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×… - Facebook art page.

I do not check DA very often anymore, sorry if I am excessively slow to reply to messages. I do not reply to notes very often.

Commissions -
I am currently closed for all commission types. I will only consider future commission projects which allow a lot of artistic freedom.
Have a day.

  • Listening to: Die Warzau - Insect
  • Reading: Man and his symbols - Carl Jung
  • Eating: Curry + jalapeno
  • Drinking: Feijoa wine & grape juice
Something this Saturday -…
  • Listening to: Error - Brains Out
  • Drinking: Cold coffee
  • Listening to: Machines of Loving Grace - Animal Mass
Last week I flew over to Sydney, mainly for the purpose of seeing a NIN concert, along with just seeing the city itself. I've previously never been to a larger city than Auckland, and the experience kindly elucidated what a tiny shithole Auckland's city actually is. Still, I can't say big cities are my thing.
The first couple of days of the trip were all right. Investigated the zoos, the parks, and the beaches. I was quite impressed by the amount of wildlife over there, even around city areas. NZ seems totally dead in comparison. The wild pelicans, ravens, ibises and lizards made me particularly happy. But mostly I was looking forward to the NIN concert, as I am tragically obsessed.
On the day of the concert we got there pretty early, and waited around outside the venue. People with spiral tickets were allowed in earlier than everyone else, so there wasn't too long to go. You could hear what sounded to be the band rehearsing before the concert, inside.
And then I overheard someone in the crowd, mentioning that the concert was cancelled. I didn't take this seriously, with it being so soon until the concert was due to begin, and hearing the band right inside. But as I wandered around the area, I began noticing this was the topic of conversation for near everyone in the vicinity. So I went to ask the person at the box office about this, and he validated that the concert had indeed been cancelled, this feking soon before it was supposed to start D: D: FAIL.

So, overall, I'd say this trip was a very big waste of money. If I'd been able to get further outside of Sydney CBD to do some exploring it would have been cool. But I guess I'm glad to at least have seen Sydney. I want to travel more, preferably some place further away from NZ next time.

On a semi-related note, I'm really liking NIN's Year Zero. Wasn't so sure about it at first, but it's got some interesting sounds to it that I'm really keen on. The music style has taken quite a different direction, and in some parts the hiphop influence is a bit too apparent for my liking. The lyrics generally make me cringe, along with the vocal style in some of the songs, which again seem to show a hiphop influence. It's an album that I find best as a whole, conveying a kind of story, which unsurprisingly happens to be a rather depressing one. But, it's not as "personal" as previous albums, which I'm ambivalent about. While I've gone off blatant "WHAAA I HATE MY LIFE" themes in music, overused political themes (which seems to be what YZ is centered around) aren't my thing either. But, ignoring this, the sound of the music is great. I think this album is far superior to With Teeth, so I'm happy :D
I'm curious about others' opinions of this album, too. Anyone?

Yeah. Felt like I should actually update this thing, and this has been the most significant thing that's happened lately.

Also, no digital art for a while. My larger screen died on me.
  • Listening to: Samael - From Malkuth to Kether
I decided to set up a Flickr gallery, for photos I've taken of stuff. Most of it is NZ nature, in the North Island. Although assorted crap can also be found there.

Otherwise, I've been trying to come up with something to do art-wise that isn't purely drawing. Then the other day I chanced upon a CUNNING PLAN. Or perhaps not so cunning. I've decided I want to fix up this thing -

I started on that when I was 12, I believe, so the anatomy is obviously quite off. It's around five feet tall, and made up mostly of cardboard, paper, and a wooden frame holding it together. Because the anatomy is so hideously bad, I think most of the effort would involve reconstructing the body to get it to a state where it's at least vaguely anatomically believeable.
For quite a while I've been considering where and when to burn the thing, but I've decided I'm going to try and give it a different fate, if that proves to be feasible.

I have also decided that if I'm going to have a "new year's resolution", it's to be more productive with art. I've uploaded one pictures to "deviations" here this year. Go me, for my mass amounts of productivity!
But I'm going to try harder to change that. I have countless ideas which I need to get around to putting onto paper, or whatever else.

Be happy now, everyone!

--… - VCL account
  • Listening to: Faith No More
  • Watching: pixels
  • Eating: NaCN
Feels as though I should actually update this for once. And I realized I've never really used this thing for the purpose of a "journal", so I will attempt to do so.

Life isn't very exciting at the moment, as always. I suppose stuff could be looked at as eventful and busy-ish, but unproductive. However, I have been down to Wellington multiple times now, to do work for Weta. It's a very interesting enviroment to work within, and being surrounded by such amazing artists as are there is intimidating, yet somehow inspirational. Just having the benefit of knowing what movies and things are in production is kinda cool, too, especially when you can contribute :P Certain upcoming movies look like they're going to be feking awesome. If not in story, then in concept and special effects at least.
Because most of what I did was intended for movie concept purposes, I can't display any of what I've done online, other than a dragon sculpture that I did for myself that Weta did two casts of. I still have yet to paint the one that Weta left plain...

Um, I'm no longer sure about the moving out thing, and I still have not determined whether or not I want to do commissions :D For now I think I'll give it all a miss. I'm still keen on moving out eventually, obviously, I'm just not sure... when.

Otherwise, I'm not online nearly as much as I used to be, so I don't have prolific amounts of time to sit and check everything on deviantart. I apologise if I'm slow with replying to comments on here. But, I currently have over 1,500 unchecked messages in my message center, and I don't exactly intend to devote my life to every one of those.
I still need to attempt being more productive with art. I continue to have endless unfinished pictures, and untouched ideas for images. The fact that seemingly everything possible has already been done is slightly offputting.  I don't find the idea of drawing something that's likely been done 3983048392 times before to be very favourable, since it seems to negate one of my primary motivational sources. But I don't think that's an aspect of art that can be escaped from.
I think I might try and put my Furaffinity account to use as well. Tragically I don't have much in the way of porn to offer, which at a glance would appear to be what the site revolves around. But as I saw while at Aerinl's place the other day, there's actually quite a lot of decent stuff on there :P My username on there is also Zarathus.

Also, it's my birthday on the 24th. I have no idea what I'll be doing then. Oh well.

-- - Livejournal… - VCL account - MySpace
Might be moving out soon, and I'd most likely need a bit of extra money to survive comfortably. So I was wondering, if I started doing commissions, would anyone be interested? And if so, what sort of pictures would people be interested in... pencil, ink, markers, etc...?

-- - Livejournal.… - VCL account. - MySpace
I don't really update this journal. So... look, a livejournal I rarely update either!… ... wow! :O :O :O

And I will upload art... EVENTUALLY. Yay! :|

This has been an exciting, and informative journal entry.
Probably won't be around for a while because :iconsecretagentrynn: is staying with me for a week.

I have a livejournal, which I update more than this thing, even if that still may not be much.… for anyone who is actually interested.

I'm quite sick at the moment, so I might take a while to reply to the 3497497393 messages I have, but I will get around to it eventually. So yeah, I am not ignoring anyone or anything...
Time feels like it's going by so quickly. When I look back to dates at things that feel like they just happened yesterday, I realise this especially.
Even having started a new school, I still get a lot of time to do stuff, but that time seems to just... disappear. Being the Procrastinator I am, that also doesn't help with things. I put things off for longer and longer, until it gets to the point where I feel it's probably too late to even bother.
I know I've done this with a lot of things on here. To the people who did stuff for me that I never commented on, I'm sorry. I do appreciate it, and I'm not trying to ignore you.
But... eh, if there is anything anyone feels I need to do, then just... tell me?

I'm sure I've said something about this before somewhere, but I can't even remember right now.



My best friends
:iconaerinl: :iconsecretagentrynn: :icongeddarkstorm: :iconsiliwili:

And.. my sister.
I will disappear for a few days. Um... I am going away with seymour.

Devious Journal Entry

Thu Sep 23, 2004, 4:09 PM
I am now 16. How um... wonderful.

And.. stuff. ...comic account, which I need to update.… ...vcl gallery.

Dragon drive is interesting.

A subject

Mon Sep 20, 2004, 1:30 AM
I don't update this thing very much.

There isn't exactly much to say, though. Well um... my birthday is in a few days
Also... I have a lot more art here, if anyone would want to see...…

The excitement!! o.o; really surprised by the amount of attention my last deviation got. Funny that....quick retarded little comic type things get more attention than even my best art. Isnt that just wodnerful.
Eh..oh well. It seems a lot of other people notice that stuff to. Im sorry if that deviation upset anyone or really wasnt meant to. I just like pointing things out that i notice. I'd say out of all the things i pointed out on there, the only bad ones would be the stealing, copying, and taking photo thing.

In other news...Alec is here for a few days. Im not sure what to think. I really need time alone..and he isnt giving me any. Well...right now hes actually out with my mum to take the dogs to the kennel place. So far everything has been ok, i would

Im also going to great barrier for five days...again, tomorow. So i wont be around for a while.
Well...i hope you all least a reasonably good christmas. Christmas was yesterday for me...It was ok...ish. Dad just got out of the hospital after having an operation on his back, so we couldnt really do as much as we usually do.
I got...just a whole lot of figures. I collect dragon, and interesting looking creature action figures. I finally got one ive been wanting for a long time..the Final Fantasy X bahamut. I was both pleased, and disappointed with it. I personally think its the most beautiful figure i have so far. What disappointed me about it...was the fact that one of its wings fell of as soon as i got it out of its packet, and none of the parts that were meant to go together, actually went together. I had to cut parts of it down to make it fit together, then use very strong glue for the wing.

Hmm...I dont know if anyone else has noticed, but lately ive been feeling less...anti-social, than i normally am. Im not sure why this happens sometimes. I will have short bursts of confidence, then for no apparent reason go back into hiding. *scratches head* I dont believe its anything to do with happiness, or depression...often when im "in hiding" i feel perfectly fine. The only thing is...actually talking to people. I feel fine with emailing people, or posting comments and such...but actually talking to people on things such as msn messenger...stresses me. It seems really odd though..usually no matter what my mood, talking to people doesnt stress me out like this. not telling anyone to stop talking to me. I really appreciate when people so much as even bother to say "hello" to me.

Im still so confused about myself. That probably sounds really stupid...but I cant even seem to decide what kind of things i do, and do not like. A lot of the time i will view the world in a very negitive way (and no, it does not depend on my mood) then the rest of the time i will try to understand everything and be all..peaceful like. I just feel so strange about it. Like i dont have an actual...self. I feel like this about many things..i can never decide on one certain thing. And even when i do manage to decide, my mind soon changes. Im not sure why this is making me feel so strange, either. Maybe its just because i see everyone else being able to settle on one thing...they seem to always be...the same person. Whenever people find something they like, they seem to be able to keep at it, and like it...forever. Then theres me...i often TRY to keep things up...but i cant.
Im sure there are a lot of other people who feel this way, too though. Maybe no one even notices these things in anyone other than themself. or maybe i just think too much...about everything.

I dont think ive ever really said this, and probably dont seem to care...but thank you all my friends for simply...being my friends, anyone who doesnt bite my head off for saying something slightly wrong, and everyone who does so much as look at my art.  I really do appreciate everything. I hope i dont seem like im ignoring people if i dont reply to things you say. I know how you might feel though if i dont reply to stuff...*flattens ears back*
Oh yeah...and thanks to kada ru for emailing me and made me feel a lot better about that certain thing that was bothering me before.

Anyway...i hope your all doing well. But..i better go to bed...before parents decide to kill me...
I cant say it doesnt bother me, or doesnt annoy me in any way...because it does. I cant say i like arguing with people, or upsetting anyone in any way...but i suppose that is inedivable with me...i seem to just annoy the hell out of everyone even when i dont want to. *sighs* I am sorry for that...I know i can be a complete fucking retard when it comes to communicating online...or anywhere at all for that matter...abuse me all you like for that, but its not going to make any difference.
What DOES get annoying, is when i try to have a reasonable argument with someone, and in return all i get is insults fired back at me. I cant help but see anyone who does that sort of stuff as really...unintelligent. It seems like they just feel trapped with what im saying, and resort to petty name calling to avoid what it is im saying, or try and offend me. Im sorry to say, but name calling and stuff does not offend me in the least bit. Its kinda funny, if anything. Sure you could say it must at least upset me a bit, because i go and talk about it..but..if no one has even noticed...i like to talk about anything and everything that isnt exactly..nice.

No, i dont hate you. I dont want to have you as some sort of enemy...but you contradict yourself, and say...stupidness so begins to really bother me, and i just...say stuff about it. You cant say because of that im stalking you. I watch you because you have very nice art..and i really love some of the dragons you draw, including your personal character. I watch anyone whos art, and creatures i like (which is a whole fucking lot, mind you) probably seems because i rarely say stuff to anyone else but you, that im picking on you. Im not. Like i said before, you just say so much of that kind of stuff that irratates me..that..i reply to some of it.
You have told me to stop posting to i'll do as you say. Unless, of reply to anything ive all ready said, or say something that seems to be kinda...about me >.> Again, you'll probably just insult me for that, i told you...i can never just seem to let things go without saying at least..something, in turn.

If you for some reason actually decide to look at my page, you'll know who you are. have my doubts about the person who thats directed at, actually seeing it though...but oh well. I dont know if thats a good or bad thing...they would probably take everything i said the wrong usual -.-' other news...i saw brie (~aerinl) ...and she stayed the night. Yay...i think. Im still hoping she at least doesnt think im TOO weird in real life ._.
Only problem about seeing her, is she lives so far away. Although..shes the only..real friend type person ive met on the internet who is also from new zealand.

I know I havent uploaded much lately. I have drawn quite a bit, actually..but none of it is finished..and im not sure if i should even bother uploading it, anyway. I have to color stuff...i havent felt like coloring anything.
I still have to get my website up ( and when i do..i think i might leave devart. Im not sure yet...i just..dont like devart so much anymore. The only good thing about it, i people do actually get to look at your art..people often seem to lazy to go and look at websites.

I think i should update my tumuki's journal more...or just make a journal for all of my characters. I dont know..others might think its just plain weird, but i like to give sort to my characters. Only reason why tumuki is the only one that currently has a hes my only character who actually has a sort of...story.

Um..yes. The end!