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First off, I want to thank all those on the long commission list for your patience with me, usually I'm not this slow. That being said, I'm officially all settled in, my work life is back under suitable control (for now), and I can continue servicing my fellow niche fetishists at an appropriate pace.

Things should be returned back to their normal level of productivity and you won't have to worry whether I'm dead or not - which I'm pretty sure is not the case, last I checked. Those who have commissioned me, we'll be in touch. You may now return to your regularly scheduled programming. 
Just an update for my commissioners, I'm in the process of making a long distance move so things may be a little delayed. I'm not dead nor have I stopped working, just a little over encumbered. Thank you all so much for your patience!
I think I might want to get involved in the community just a little more. Anybody care to point a friend toward a fruit related discord, place, or site?
    Feeling too wealthy? Can't get out of bed from all the gold lining your pockets? Want some relief from your financial burdens? Well have I got a deal for you! Stop on by your local niche deviantart page and commission up your least favorite inflation-related author. The rules of the game are simple:

    - One dollar per page
    - Every page over ten will have an extra dollar charge in addition to the original one dollar
    - A twenty page limit per piece will be instituted to ensure profit of my time and that the quality of your piece does not dilute. If you want something beyond that, another piece will have to be commissioned
    -Paypal is the only form of payment, DA points are not accepted. This is non-negotiable
    -I reserve the right to deny anyone anything as well as any aspects of a commission I do not agree with. Animals, vore, and feeding are automatically off the table

    You determine every twist and turn of the piece. You can make it as clean or salacious as you desire. Have a specific character in mind? Want something specific to happen to them? We can make it happen, you and I. Or, be as vague as you like and leave it to me to improvise on the blanks. Want a story that's one page? Or five? Or fifteen? You decide or let me have my way and see where it winds up. Every bit of information will be discussed in private for protection of the commissioner.
    So stop by and slip me a note as we'll strike up a plan. Any questions, feel free to ask!

    Disclosure: All commissions are a transformative effort by both the writer and commissioner. Ideas are bounced between two persons and nobody is solely responsible for any elements that you may be uncomfortable with. Attacking either person for something you cannot handle is unwarranted and immature. There are always warnings before each piece so there are no excuses for you.