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  • Listening to: Voices in my head
  • Drinking: Anything I can get my hands on
Well spent another week in the hospital. Found out I have a blood clot in my leg that caused me to have a bunch in my lungs making it very hard for me to breath. And while I was there I found out I might also have cancer in my liver. Fun fucking year so far.
  • Listening to: Voices in my head
  • Drinking: Anything I can get my hands on
Well the title says it all. I knew something was wrong for some time. And now I know what. I’ve been diagnosed with stage 3 colon cancer. That’s why I haven’t been around for some time spent the last ten days in the hospital getting my gut rejiggered. I’m doing ok now and I am home, just some minor discomfort and soreness from surgery. In about a month I’ll be doing 6 months of preventative chemo and that might take me out of the game for a little while more but I will be back.
  • Listening to: Voices in my head
  • Drinking: Anything I can get my hands on
I have to put my little doggie down tomorrow.
  • Listening to: Voices in my head
  • Watching: Highlander: Endgame
  • Drinking: Anything I can get my hands on
My Father has died.
  • Listening to: Voices in my head
  • Watching: Anthropophagus
  • Drinking: Anything I can get my hands on
Just got off the phone with a doctor.  My dad's back in another hospital with several problems going on.  He's having trouble swallowing and breathing he might also be septic he also has pneumonia again.  They asked me about his DNR and if that included intubation and I said yes.  I don't want him intubated.  It sounds like he might be circling the drain.  They've been talking about putting him on a feeding tube but now I don't see the point in that.
  • Listening to: Voices in my head
  • Drinking: Anything I can get my hands on
The old man gets moved to hospice today.  And the best new is it won't cost me a penny.
  • Listening to: Voices in my head
  • Watching: Troll Hunter
  • Drinking: Anything I can get my hands on
The old man called me this morning.  Couldn't realy understand a thing he said.  He was in full mush mouth mode.  Couldn't even tell if it was english at first.  But I do think was asking me to kill him or to tell the hospital to kill him.  This wouldn't be the first time he's done this though.  I called the hospital just to find out was going on and if it really was my dad or just some crazy foreign guy.  Appearently he asked to call me.
  • Listening to: Voices in my head
  • Watching: Trick r' Treak
  • Drinking: Anything I can get my hands on
I have decided to put the old man into hospice care. I've been going over the Power Of Attorney and it looks like I might have the option of taking him off of food and water if it becomes needed. I would rather he die in two weeks than have him suffer for the next 6 months to a year while his cancer eats away at him. I'll have to talk to the people who help me with his estate to make sure.
  • Listening to: Voices in my head
  • Watching: Star Trek: First Contact
  • Drinking: Anything I can get my hands on
Just talked to his doctor again and his health appears to be declining but not rapidly.  He is walking with some help but he still needs help to eat and is having trouble swallowing his food.  He has also com down with pneumonia and they are treating for that.  They can't use a feeding tube because it could make it worse. They found a mass in one of his kidneys and think that it may be cancer.  They can't do a biopsy because he's at too high of a risk of dieing from the surgery.  So it looks like they can't really do anything for him.
  • Listening to: the radio
  • Drinking: Anything I can get my hands on
Since the old man has been in the hospital for Pancreatitis things are starting to go down hill. They took care of the Gallstone causing the problem and the infection. But there appears to be another infection they can't track down and they think he might need more surgery but consider him at too high of a risk to do it. His dementia has progressed to what looks like the final stage. He doesn't talk and won't feed or cloth himself. But this could also be caused by the unknown infection.
  • Drinking: Anything I can get my hands on
Just found out my little demon in a dog suit might have leukemia.  Not a happy day.
  • Watching: Thor
  • Playing: With myself
  • Eating: Flounder
  • Drinking: Anything I can get my hands on
Buried my brother yesterday.  Glad it's finally over.
  • Watching: Beyond the Door
Well since I cracked open my first pumpkin beer over the weekend I thought I'd share my recipe for cooked pumpkin seeds.

Spread the seeds out on an oiled cookie sheet or two if you have alot of seeds. Mix the seeds around a little bit to coat them in oil, this will help the salt to stick.
Salt to taste of course. I sometimes will split the batch up and use cinnamon as well.
Bake seeds at 325 degrees for about 25 minutes. stir the seeds about half way through and check on them until browned.
Remove from oven.
  • Watching: Blue Thunder
Saw my idiot brother today. Kind of looks like one of those kids with Progeria now. He leaves his nurseing home on saturday. I don't know if that's the end of his chemo or not. Can't really bring myself to care either. I'll be surprised if he lives out the year.
  • Watching: Planet Of The Apes ( the shitty remake)
A large storm wiped through my neighborhood early Monday morning and knocked out the power.  Only now just got it back at around 2 o'clock today.  While bored out of my mind I decided to do the unthinkable.  I went and saw a movie.  Not just any movie a 3D movie, that's right I popped my 3D cherry and I rather enjoyed it.  Decided to see Transformers three and enjoyed the hell out it.  But then I'm not a fan of the shitty cartoon based on the shitty toy line so I've liked all the movies.  Only problem was the ugly new girlfriend.  I'll take Megan Fox over this one.  And I found that the 3D worked rather well.

UPDATE...
Just sitting here watching Planet Of The Apes and I thought.  This version might work as a TV show on HBO or Showtime.  Something like that Sparticus show.  The large amount of make ups would probably cost too much.  But it could work with only 12 episode seasons.
  • Watching: Mother Of Tears
I think I actually saw white people melting today.  And my computer is being a bitch and won't render because of the heat.  I hate summer so much.
Godzilla: Final Wars is two hours of pure torture.  Not enough Godzilla and too much humans posing with guns and jumping around like idiots.  It's like Zach "The Hack" Snyder had somehow managed to make a Godzilla movie.  It's pathetic.
  • Watching: Godzilla: Final Wars
On Wednesday I talked to the people who help me with my father's estate and they've made it clear that my father and I have no legal or finacial responsability when it comes to my brother and his illness. Maybe I can actually enjoy the weekend. WooPee! Where all the white women at!?
  • Watching: Friday The 13th part 6: Jason Lives
It's too damn hot.  My computer won't let me render any pictures without pitching a bitch.
  • Watching: Friday The 13th part 5: A New Beginning.
Just talked to my idiot brothers nurse and he's still in the same condition he was Tuesday night so nothing has really changed. They still can't do the tests needed to make sure his mass is cancer but everyone seems curtain that it is. Lung cancer does spread rather fast and he's probably had it for some time before coming to live with me.