Published: March 23, 2013
Epilogue: Prelude to Kingdom Hearts 3
"Yeah. What do you think?"
"Sorry, but I'm still trying to wrap my head around this. You actually managed to hack your copy of Kingdom Hearts 2 and play as Kairi and Naminé?"
"Well, I had to take a few liberties. I did some model swaps, custom animations, new audio files, and a 'clothes dynamic system' which allows the girls' clothes to get ripped apart from damage."
"But you're a girl. Why would you want the girls to be getting stripped instead of the guys? If you were capable of doing that to Kairi and Naminé, you could've just as easily done it to Sora and Riku."
"What? You think just because I'm female doesn't mean that I'm not into ecchi fanservice?"
"No! I didn't mean it like that!"
"Uh huh. There was no real reason. I did it for the challenge."
"I'm surprised you managed to do the whole Vs. Organization XIII battle. No one has ever been able to get more than three different Organization bosses at the same time since the game can't handle all of that data simultaneously."
"Well, the Kingdom Hearts 2 discs can't. That's why I ripped the data onto my computer and worked from there."
"So it's not really hacking KH2, just creating your own fangame based on the current software's capabilities."
"Kinda reminds me of that fanmade Chrono Trigger midquel that bridged Chrono Trigger and Chrono Cross. You know, before Square sent that C&D letter?"
"Meh. Not my fault that they didn't think of it first. Besides, I'm not going to make any money off of it. In its current state, the game is still in beta and most computers wouldn't be able to handle the mods."
"Wait. What's that file right there? 'Nomura.DAT?'"
"I haven't been able to figure that out yet. It's one of those key files that seems to hold the entire game together. It can't be modded or hacked without severely corrupting the entire game."
"Maybe Nomura put his own secret avatar in the hidden depths of the game where no mere player can see him?"
"Yeah, right. If that were true, the internet would've heard about it by now."
"Still, you really think it's a good idea to alter the very essence of the game itself?"
"Why not? I beat the game legitimately hundreds of times. I think I deserve it. Besides, it's not like the changes will affect anything in canon anyway..."
* * *
"Wow. Just wow." Kairi closed her eyes and let out a sigh of contentment as she snuggled up closer to Sora. After a plethora of "physical activities," Sora and Kairi lay outside on the deck of their honeymoon suite. There was a slight chill in the air as the couple cuddled underneath the starry night backdrop. To stay warm, Sora had offered his half-jacket to her, but that didn't stop them from pressing up against each other for body heat.
The Keyblade master smiled at the lovely girl curled up against his chest. "Not bad for our first time, huh?"
"Are you kidding? That felt so..." Kairi's shoulders bunched up from happiness. "...exhilarating!"
Sora gently brushed his fingers through her long, red hair. "You're sure you haven't done it before?"
"When I'm with you, I feel like I can do anything," Kairi murmured dreamily. Her eyes suddenly snapped open when she felt something hard pressing up against her thigh. "Um, Sora..."
She raised her head up slightly and smirked at him. "Is that your Keyblade or are you still happy to see me?"
Sora couldn't hide his surprise at the playful accusation. He immediately reached underneath the makeshift blanket, rummaged around for a bit, and pulled out Kairi's Keyblade. "Does this answer your question?"
Kairi giggled. "I was wondering where that went." The Princess of Heart took it from his hands and casually tossed it aside before resting her head back against his chest. "You haven't done this with any other girls, have you?" she asked mock-suspiciously.
Sora knew better than to take her seriously. "Why? Jealous?" The sound of his heavy breathing felt soothing to her ears.
"Maaaaybe." She traced a finger lazily over Sora's chest. "Doing it under the stars is the best part." Then her head perked up. "Can we do it again?"
Seeing the excitement in her eyes, Sora flashed a toothy grin. "You're not exhausted?"
Kairi laughed. "No way! I love it!"
The bushy-haired youth inhaled deeply and let out a satisfied sigh before replying, "Of course!"
"Careful, Sora," Roxas said. "If this keeps up, Kairi might break you."
"Oh, buck up, Roxas," Naminé teased. "How many times have we almost died now? Your body can take it."
"I still can't believe it," Kairi said. "I really flew! If this is what sex feels like, then I can't wait until we get married for real!"
"Let's not get ahead of ourselves, Kairi," the Memory Witch replied.
"It was nice of Peter Pan to give us this honeymoon package even after calling off the wedding," the redhead continued.
Sora nodded. "Tell me about it. I've always wanted to take you back here ever since I learned how to fly. Almost wondered if you'd actually believe me or not."
"It's all about the happy thoughts," Roxas added.
"Happy, not perverted, right?" Naminé joked. "No English nannies or chimney sweepers needed!"
Kairi sat up with Sora following suit. "Seriously, Sora. We would've been mobbed if it weren't for you..."
* * *
Olette's eyes fluttered open in a daze. She found herself sitting in a pew in-between Hayner and Pence, who both seemed groggy themselves. Looking around the wedding hall, she realized that she wasn't the only one who was confused.
"What's going on?" Hayner rubbed his eyes sleepily and stared at her.
"I have no idea. Last thing I remember was that Sora was up at the altar and we were taking bets whether Kairi would go through with this or not." He glanced up at said altar. "Speaking of which, where is Sora?"
"Riku's missing too," Pence observed.
To everyone's astonishment, a corridor of darkness erupted out in the middle of the aisles, causing everyone to rip open their smuggled packages and don their weapons. Donald gave a sideways glare at Goofy.
"Uh, Goofy?" Donald began. "I thought you were in charge of security."
"Yup!" Goofy thrust his chest out proudly. "I'm Captain of the Royal Knights!"
"Then how did all the wedding guests bring their weapons inside with them?"
Goofy shrugged. "Gawrsh, I dunno. All of 'em were carrying long, thin boxes for the weddin'. I thought they were the presents."
Donald crossed his arms and started tapping his webbed foot in impatience. "Were they wrapped?"
"Hmm..." Goofy took off his hat and scratched his head. "Now that you mention it, I don't believe so." Donald smacked his forehead in disbelief.
"Kairi, wait for us!" The Princess of Heart burst out of the portal followed by Sora and Riku. "We're back!" Sora exclaimed. The corridor evaporated, leaving the group smackdab in the middle of a circle of weapons, causing them to flinch.
"It's them!" Selphie yelled. There was a collective sigh of relief as blades, guns and magic were lowered. The other teenagers ran up to the Keyblade wielders and gave them affectionate hugs.
"Kairi! Why aren't you wearing your wedding gown?" Olette raised an eyebrow. "Did you get cold feet after all?"
"And what happened to the tuxedo I lent you?" Tidus asked Sora.
Before the former bride and groom could answer, Riku cut them off. "I think we better get the announcement over with. The sooner, the better."
Kairi cleared her throat and cupped her hands in front of her mouth to shout over the commotion the other wedding guests were making. "Attention, everyone! I'm sorry, but the wedding's off!"
There was a moment of silence as her words sunk in. Then everyone responded with a huge "WHAT?!"
"I know this will be hard to believe, but this entire wedding was a plot to destroy everyone's worlds again!"
"Don't worry, though. We took care of it!" Sora chimed in.
Riku walked up to King Mickey and got down on one knee to speak easier.
"I'm sorry, your Majesty. The letter you got from Ansem the Wise was actually forged by Xehanort beforehand."
The King looked slightly wary. "How do you know this?"
"It's a long story and now might not be a good time to give you the details. But we're telling the truth." King Mickey shifted his gaze towards Sora and Kairi, who affirmed Riku's statements with quick nods.
"If what you say is true..." The King smiled warmly at the trio. "...then there's no reason to continue the ceremony, is there?"
"So what happens now?" Olette asked. "You're not seriously thinking of sending the guests home after all the trouble of getting them here, are you?" Indeed, the crowd was getting restless and Kairi didn't know what to tell them. She turned to Riku.
"Any ideas?" Riku crossed his arms and dropped his head deep in thought.
Surprisingly, it was Sora who came up with the solution. "We're still having the reception!" he called out. "So, free food!"
The wedding hall went silent again, only to be broken by Jack Sparrow shouting "To the rum!" Everyone misheard him say 'room,' but cheered nonetheless. With the mob crisis averted, the wedding guests began clearing out to the reception hall.
The Destiny Island trio waited until the wedding hall was empty before releasing sighs with relief.
"Figures," Kairi said, shaking her head. "Of course they wouldn't care less as long as there's free stuff."
"Almost like they're pirates," Roxas observed.
"Well, one of them is a pirate," Naminé corrected him. "I guess that would make the rest of them his crew?"
Sora wrapped an arm around Kairi's waist, giving her a quick one-armed squeeze. "Looks like you're not going to have to worry about ruling Radiant Garden after all, Kairi."
The redhead winked at him coyly. "Just because I'm a Princess of Heart doesn't necessarily mean I have to rule over something. Look at Alice and Belle!"
"Regardless, I think we should keep the rest of the exposition to ourselves for the time being." Sora and Kairi looked stunned at Riku's suggestion, making the silver-haired teen chuckle. "I mean let's enjoy the party first. No reason to spoil it!"
The trio snapped out of their private conversation bubble when the sounds of expensive china breaking and Stitch's cackling echoed from the reception hall.
"Somebody catch that panda!" Mushu's voice rang out.
The Keyblade wielders looked at each other with smiles of amusement and without another word, headed off to rescue their friends from an ever-increasing catering bill...
* * *
"You know, it's odd," Sora said, stroking his chin thoughtfully. "I looked around for Tarzan, but he seems to have vanished out of existence. I asked around for him, but no one knew who I was talking about. Maybe Nomura wasn't able to restore him or something."
"Could he have swapped his data with Tron?" Roxas suggested. "I'm surprised that he was outside the datascape this time around."
"Now that I think about it, I don't think you ever mentioned Tarzan at all until the wedding," Kairi pointed out.
"I haven't? Strange. Maybe Naminé didn't put all my memories back exactly the way they were."
"Hey, don't blame this on me. It's not my fault that a naked man in a loincloth wasn't imprinted deep into your psyche."
"Aren't we all naked under our clothes?" Roxas quipped. "Goodness knows you girls have proved that."
"How exactly do you know that?" Naminé gasped in surprise. "You shouldn't have any memory of me being naked!"
"What?! I was talking about Kairi! When were you naked?" Roxas paused in thought. "You Mind Crushed me again, didn't you?"
"No," Naminé responded flatly. "To prove my point, I will now perform the Jedi Mind Meld."
"Naminé? Let him be." Kairi pursed his lips. "You can't solve everything with a lobotomy."
"Not to mention you combined Star Wars and Star Trek again," Sora added.
"As tempting as it is, changing Sora's alter egos whenever something bad happens to us might be stunting his maturity growth," Kairi said. The corners of her mouth started to twitch downward.
Noticing the slight frown on her lips, Sora could tell there was something on her mind. "What's up, Kairi?"
"Nothing, just reflecting." She stifled a yawn. "Remember when I said to you 'Don't ever change?'"
"How could I forget? Sunset on the dock with just the two of us." Sora absentmindedly caressed the tips of his fingers down Kairi's neck, causing thrills down her spine. "If anything, you ended up changing more than me."
Kairi flashed him a mocking grin. "You're still the adorable, lazy bum I grew up with."
"You know, I've been wondering about that for a while now. What kind of bum are you referring to? A lazy butt or..."
"What, did you want Sora to don a beige trenchcoat and an orange knit hat shaking a styrofoam cup and shouting 'Change?! You got change?!'"
Naminé's voice shivered. "Gee, thanks a lot, Roxas. Now I can't get the image of Sora with facial hair out of my head."
Sora smiled from ear to ear and began rubbing his thumb and forefinger near the edge of his lips. "I've always wanted to twirl a curly mustache."
"I swear, you can forget about kissing me if you end up with a face full of fuzz. You know how prickly and uncomfortable that can be?"
"It's like if we forgot to shave our..." Naminé stopped herself. "Just...don't grow anything, okay?"
"I really doubt we'll turn into a werewolf like Saix's mother," Roxas replied.
"I feel a bit guilty about Riku," Sora said suddenly.
Kairi raised an eyebrow. "Why?"
"All the hustle and bustle for our wedding and I don't think Riku was able to pick up any girls."
"Please. That's because he wasn't even trying. But now that you mention it, who was that girl with Tidus? I don't think I've seen her before."
"Her? That was Yuna. She's actually a faerie taking on a human form," Sora explained. "I think that she's dating him now."
"Interesting." Sora looked slightly taken back from Kairi's indifference. "What?"
"You don't seem that surprised about her being a faerie."
"Sora, we live in a universe with yellow canary-ostrich hybrids and Moogles. Faeries turning into human girls are considered a normal thing around here."
"You know, it's strange," Naminé commented. "Even though they have no memories of fighting alongside each other, everyone still seemed to be drawn together into groups by game."
"Like Leon and Selphie? Or Auron, Tidus and Wakka?" Sora shrugged. "Maybe they were destined to meet regardless. Getting everyone together for the wedding just happened to speed up that meeting."
"Speaking of games, doesn't it bother you to know that our entire lives have been chronicled into a video game franchise?" Kairi took a look around at her surroundings warily. "There are literally thousands of people out there that know our private lives, watching every move we make, holding power over whether we win or die." Even though she had body heat and Sora's jacket, she couldn't help but shiver slightly. "Now that it's pretty much been confirmed we're not completely in control of our journey, there's always going to be this tiny part of me that doubts whether I'm in full control of my actions or not."
"I wouldn't worry too much about it, Kairi." Kairi tilted her head, curious. "If anything, everyone will be watching me, Riku and Roxas."
"Not to mention my panties," the redhead muttered darkly. "Seriously, Nomura couldn't have just made underneath my dress a black hole?"
Roxas started to say something, but quickly decided against it. "I'm not touching that with a ten-foot pole."
"Or any other part of your body," Naminé countered.
Sora suddenly grinned. "Okay, how about the rest of your body?"
Before Kairi could react, Sora flipped her over and straddled her, locking her arms against her sides.
"So, I can't touch...here?" He gave a quick tickle poke to her ribs, eliciting a squeak from Kairi. "Or...here?" Sora swiftly prodded her other side. "Or here, or here, orhereorhereorhereorhere..." Dropping all pretenses, Sora rapidly began tickling up and down Kairi's ribcage like playing a keyboard with her giggles as the symphonic piece.
"NYAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" The redhead tried to buck Sora off of her, but his body weight kept her helplessly immobile. All she could do was kick her feet wildly in the air with endless mirth.
Despite having been ruthlessly tickle tortured a few times throughout her adventure, Kairi was surprisingly okay with Sora doing this to her. Although he was being merciless in making her laugh, the feeling of his touch on her body sent tingles pulsating throughout her nervous system. Maybe it was the strong bond of trust they had with each other or the fact that she had wished that he'd always be close to her, but there was no fear or reluctance within her mind or heart.
Kairi was truly enjoying herself, but had a daring idea in mind. When Sora let up for a few seconds, she burst out with "Hey, Roxas! Want to get Naminé too?"
"WHAT?!" Naminé protested, but Kairi was already in the middle of shifting bodies. Naminé struggled to remain out of the nerve endings' reach, resulting in both girls to be in a melded, limbo-like state. The boys were slightly taken back to see Naminé with Kairi's shoulder-length hair and red highlights.
Not to be shown up like this, Sora and Roxas attempted to do the same thing, resulting in Roxas with Sora's brown hair with blonde highlights, giving the illusion of a brilliant gold flame on their heads.
"Roxas! Don't you dare!" Naminé tried to plead with a cute doe-eyed pout, but the adorable gesture backfired as it only spurned more motivation for the ticklers to continue. The boys dug their fingertips into the girls' closed armpits and began vibrating inside the soft, sensitive hollows.
Both lovers somehow managed to teeter in-between identities, synchronized to be able to enjoy and experience simultaneously. Naminé was reminded of the last tickle torture session she had experienced with Xemnas and the tentacles, but the difference this time was that she had an outlet for her laughter.
The endorphins running through the girls were given a sudden spike when the boys quickly stopped the assault and planted their lips over the girls', eliciting surprised, but welcome, moans of pleasure.
"So soft..." Kairi thought as she melted in Sora's arms. When they finally broke apart, Kairi had reverted back to her complete self while Sora had done the same. She could feel her face radiating with warmth from both blushing and recovering from the tickles.
When she finally regained her voice, she asked "What brought that on?"
"You sounded like you needed some cheering up," Sora said, still grinning. "It's not like you to still be brooding when everyone we care about is alive and well."
"But what about-" Sora placed a finger on her lips.
"I'm not leaving you behind this time." Sora rolled off of Kairi and gently brushed her cheek with the back of his fingers. "I promise."
Kairi smiled a non-forced grin this time. "I'm sure you say that to all the girls," she giggled.
"He probably does," Naminé chimed in. Roxas couldn't help but laugh.
Kairi got to her feet and extended her hand out to Sora. "We'll go together."
Sora enthusiastically grabbed her outstretched hand and nodded. "Yeah!" As soon as he was upright, Kairi dragged him hurriedly toward the nearest railing and over the edge of the deck. Adrenaline pumped through their bodies as the two tumbled into freefall, plunging into the great void.
"WOOOOOOOOOHOOOOOOOO!!" As soon as the couple dropped far enough, the thoughts of being with each other filled their hearts and they began spiraling upward into the starry night sky. Looking back, they watched in awe as their honeymoon suite, Captain Hook's stolen pirate ship, sparkled with fairy dust in the soft moonlight. They hovered silently in one spot, gazing lovingly into each other’s eyes.
"There's something I've been wanting to tell you for a while now..."
"I love you, Kairi." Kairi's eyes widened at Sora's sudden confession.
"You dork! I was about to say that!" She smacked him playfully on the shoulder.
"Well, there's nothing stopping you from saying it now," Naminé said.
Kairi sighed. "Fine. Sora, I lo-"
"Get a room, you two!" Sora and Kairi jumped at the familiar voice. Riku was flying toward them with an amused expression on his face.
"Oh, come on!" Kairi glared at Riku. "Really, Riku?! Really?"
"What? I needed to ask-"
"I was about to...ERGH!"
Riku glanced at Kairi and then back at Sora. "Oh. You two were having a moment. Sorry about that." Awkwardly excusing himself, the silver-haired teen flew around the other side of the ship and out of sight.
Kairi rolled her eyes. "Why's Riku here again? You know what, doesn't matter right now." She waited a few seconds to make sure there weren't any more sudden interruptions. Sora looked at her expectedly. "Sora, I-"
The redhead's jaw dropped. "What."
"Sorry, that's my phone." Sora reached into his pocket and looked at it. "Oh, it's from the King. I wonder what he wants." Before Sora could pick up, in her unvanquished frustration, Kairi snagged the phone and chucked it back onto the ship.
"Damn it, Sora! I love you, okay?!" And then in a quieter tone, "I love you, Sora. With all my heart." Kairi leaned in and kissed her shining knight with all of the passion she had reserved for him.
When their lips broke apart again, Sora chuckled. "Hmm...I think I can get used to this."
"Congratulations, you've been promoted to make-out partner," Kairi teased, lightly tapping him on the nose.
"Wait, what was I before?" Kairi only giggled. Taking his hand in hers, she gave him an affectionate look.
"Ready, SIR Sora?"
"But, of course, PRINCESS Kairi!"
"Shall we, SIR Roxas?"
"I'd be honored, PRINCESS Naminé." And with that, they tightly grasped each other's hand, sealing their hearts' connection eternally and soared through the night sky to wherever the force of destiny would lead them...
*TO BE CONTINUED IN KINGDOM HEARTS 3*
*...THE HACKED VERSION...*
*...OKAY, PROBABLY NOT...*