Hello everyone, I'm currently trying to make a novel series following the story of Branden Ureki, his friends, and many hijinks situations that he (Unwillingly) gets involved in, its mostly a down-to-earth action story that mixes anime and cartoon tropes into it. I would also like to hear some feedback as well since I have tons of ideas for new abilities and gimmicks (but I worry that i might either over or never used them in the series) thank you and good.....(should I mention I writing this down to make a game , cause improving and rewriting it is what I like to do before adding more)
Chapter 1 – The High School Kid | Looking for feedback!
> Hi everyone! 😊
I’ve just published Chapter 1 of a supernatural coming-of-age story I’m developing, titled “The Biscuit Curse.”
This is part of a 27-chapter series I’m working on as a collaboration. Chapter 1 introduces Gary Wadeworth, a high school basketball player whose life begins to change in mysterious ways after a game — and a strange biscuit.
📘 Read Chapter 1 here:
https://www.deviantart.com/.../Chapter-1-The-High-School...
💬 I’d really appreciate your thoughts or suggestions:
– What did you think of Gary as a protagonist?
– Would you like to see more suspense, character development, or action in Chapter 2?
– Any favorite (or unclear) moments?
Thanks in advance to anyone who reads — even a short comment helps! 🙏
I’ll be continuing the series step-by-step and improving along the way based on feedback.