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:iconwaltz-with-me:
First off, I thought this poem had very great impact. It was the charged language, the words like "malice," "cyanide," "tortures," "skeleton," et cetera. I don't necessarily agree with your use of a few of them, but they did help make the poem powerful, in my opinion. Good work.

However, some of it got a little melodramatic. Consider "orbs of malice." I feel like I've heard that line time and time again. Try twisting that image on its head, making it say the same thing just in a way I haven't seen - and I would suggest not using "orbs" for "eyes" at all.

Put a semicolon after the line "You tell me you love me." I like the next line, despite the use of "suicide," because it's unexpected - makes me think about what you're saying, and I like it. Love the use of the word "cyanide." I would suggest eliminating the line "as I am ripe and harvested for such tortures" altogether because it is wordy and doesn't say anything extra.

Love the line "schlepped off along the waysides"; it's extremely effective. I would suggest putting a semicolon after waysides and changing "compositing" to "compost," to make it just as powerful. "They are busy digesting the words my tongue would say if it owned a body." Beautiful!

I'm not sure if I like the use of "composting" and then "decomposition." I would consider finding another word there, so it's not so glaringly similar. I would take out the word "spring" so it's just "off-season cleaning," because I think that works better.

And hmm, I'm not crazy about the last line. But I don't have any suggestions for it, either, so maybe just think on it? Wow, that's supremely unhelpful. Sorry! Just flag it. ;D

So, all in all, I really liked this poem; I thought it was powerful and had some really, really nice word choice. The only things I thought could use some work was some melodrama and some wordiness. Other than that, it's wonderful. Good luck!
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