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So hey it was a long time ago that I updated my journal here (over a year ago actually) so why not update a bit on some nice things thats happened this year;

First of all, as I have mentioned once; I've got a new job. This time also as an art teacher, it's amazingly fun! It takes a lot of my time but its fun and very rewarding teaching children how to draw <3

Next thing worth mentioning is that I ended up first place in a huge comic contest here in Sweden, I still can't really believe this happened but wow, this was just incredible!

Another thing that has happened is that I'm currently working on a sequel to the childrens book I illustrated last year, it's gonna be published around April next year!

There is yet another big project I'm working on, though I'm not sure if I can talk about it or not, so that will just have to wait.

So the last thing I'm putting on this list is....I've got a boyfriend! Yup, there's a first time for everything :o we work at the same school and he's a piano teacher there! It's all very cute <3

This makes 2015 seem like an amazingly lucky year fo me, but it's really been a struggle with awful things happening to my family and people around me. I don't want to write about everything bad that has happened out of respect for the people it's happened to (just trust me, it's a LOT of things). If anything I really hope my "luck" with things may happen to them 2016, they deserve it more than I do right now.
So to end this, I hope you all had a great year and that 2016 will be amazing, take care of yourself and go and give your family and the people you love a hug, 'cause you never know when thing's like these may happen.
Hello again guys, once again it was a long time since I updated my journal!

As I mentioned last time, I'm now working on two jobs, one as a cleaning lady and another as a comic/art teacher, between those two I am freelance worker and I try to also be able to live my life and take care of my dog.
Let's just say that life is crazy busy right now!
But on the other hand, the second half of this year I will be off duty from the cleaning job and will be working full time on being an art teacher and a freelancer, I might even get some time to open up for commissions online.

So let's put it like this - first part of this year = Crazy busy and stressful
second part of the year = awesomely creative

long time ago since I updated my journal, and now I only do it to update a little about what's going on in my life atm!

First of all, I've got back to work now (as a cleaning lady wohooo...), or well, I've been back at work since June BUT ANYWAY. It's boring. That's about it. Though I've been asked to hold some classes about making comics at the school where I work, so that's kinda nice!
Second of all, starting from January I will also have a second job! And this time, as an Art teacher! Which will be AWESOME.
Third thing to say is that I have managed to kept my webcomic b.b.f ( read it and cry, because of the stupidness) alive for almost a year now which is like a record for me, and I will have 220 pages finished by the end of this year, yeah!

A fourth thing I can mention as well is that right now I'm working on two childrens books (with two different writers) and both of them have their deadline in December, so this is keeping me very busy right now and I sadly won't be able to show any of the art until I get an ok to do so (IF I get an ok to upload them)

So...all in all I will be busy as never before and I will barely have ANY time to work on personal art right now, so don't expect much from me right now...
I'll be in Stockholm this weekend, selling comics at SPX! We will be sitting pretty close to the entrance so it should be easy to find me and my friends table!
hope to see some people there :D
but... I made it into Kvarnby comics school in Malmö which is a school I have wanted to go to for 4 years now...

I got the letter today and was all like asdhjadhjashjsd

one part of me just can't wait while another part of me is scared when I was about to go to the other comic (and arts) school :o

the thing that makes these two schools different is that this one in Malmö is MUCH harder to get into and it's at a harder level overall!

Sooo anywaaaay...I'm wondering if there might be anyone else here who have gotten a yes on their application?
it would be fun to know about it <3 yeah, anyway, I find it amazing that I actually managed to get in there, I didn't think I would stand any chance <3

and before you ask, I don't know how my hands will survive it though, but I DO have the ability to change drawing hand at will nowadays and I guess that will help me out very much in this case!
my hands again that is, auuugh sorry for going on and on about it but I get so many questions and writing hurts my hand so I prefer to just write it all down so that everyone can read it, so there will be some questions I get a lot here:

-what happened with them?
(this one goes for newer watchers I guess) I got carpal tunnel syndrome(CTS) in both of my hands, it started in my right hand (my dominant one) and then it happened to my left hand as well.
I have written a longer journal about this (… ), anyone who's an artist should know about it and the pain that comes with it and try to avoid it as well as they can if you ask me.

-how are your hands doing after the treatment?
I'm not gonna lie, they aren't perfect or anything like they used to be.
...or well, my left hand is pretty good but my right hand probably won't go back to it's old self again.
Pretty sad but I have cried enough tears over this and accepted it so it's just how life is now.
I am also pretty much done with the treatment after several months of it, so I have said myself to the one treating me that we aren't making any progress anymore.

why don't you operate them?
because of several reasons:
1. there is a chance that it won't help at all and I prefer not to go through with something that might be compleatly useless and leave me without work for over a month.
2. there is also the risk that it might turn out WORSE, I have my mother as a living example for that one.
3. Even IF they get better there is still a very big chance that it will go back as how it was before.

So as I said, I prefer to not go through with something like that, if I can avoid an operation I will.

why did you start using your left hand?
Only because of the fact that I got fricking depressed over the fact that I couldn't do the thing I love to do.
At first I kind of did it as a joke that I was so horrible at it, but after really sitting down, taking mt time with it I noticed that the result wasn't all that bad after all, so I continued with it.
And yes I haven't ever known about that before this happened, I have never felt the urge to draw something with my left hand while my right hand was working just fine.

and now you are ambidextrous?
That could be discussed, if you look closely the lines are shaky and not nearly as stable as they would be with my right hand, coloring is almost impossible and I can't handle digital art at ALL with it.
But sketching is not a problem at all and the majority of all the art I do upload here nowadays is sketched with my left hand.
...Not that I have uploaded all that much since this all happened but you get my point I guess.
So you can say that scetching (and writing) is pretty much mastered
lines is hard but I do my best
and coloring ain't anything near what my right hand can do.
So yeah see it as you will, I kinda see myself as ambidextrous but I still have a lot to learn before I can fully say that I am.

Sooo that's all I can think about atm, now my right hand hurts after all that writing...xD¨
So yeah, sorry about me not answering barely ANYTHING atm but you have the reasons here.
10 000 watchers! :o
that's AMAZING!

and just because of this I am probably gonna lose like ONE watcher just to destroy this moment...XD

I was about to make a pic when this happened, but I can never trust on my hands working whenever I want them to, so this will have to do!

I am gonna try to be more active now that my hands are better, as I have said, my left hand shows no signs at all anymore! But that doesn't mean that I am gonna overuse it like before, so I still have to take things easy.
And my right hand is kind of...meh? sometimes it doesn't get tired or start to hurt for HOURS, and some days I can barely even move the hand without it getting numb and/or hurt...
Today seems to be a good day though, so hurray I guess? ;)

...wooopsieee this turned out longer than I planned to, time to leave, but bye you guys, thank you for making my morning <3
I was asked to write a journal about how my cts is doing, so I will do so!

As you might know/remember I did go to a massage therapist to see if she could do something agains't it, I didn't have too much hope about it though because the doctor tould me that an operation would be the ONLY way to fix this.

Well so I went there once after having to wear my handbrace on my right hand for 4 months (and one for my left for 1 month) and you kno what happened two hours later?
I walked out there WITHOUT those braces.
Yes it did hurt, but not at ALL like it did before I visited her!

And what is even better?
I haven't had to wear them even ONCE after that.

This is the closest to a miracle I have ever gone through honestly, I NEVER believed the effect would be so noticable just after ONE visit.

She massage my wrist, she uses acupuncture (which hurts like hell but it DOES feel MUCH better afterwards), she uses laser and possibly the most important thing - she TALKS about me with my problem and let me talk and cry however much I need to do which is something I have needed to do ever since this started. That might not be the most important thing for my hands, but to talk with someone about this after what I have gone through is REALLY important! I have been VERY depressed about this from time to time with no one I really could talk that much about it with. (and by that I mean that I want to talk with a person face to face, it just isn't the same thing to alk over computers...)
So yeah, maybe it sounds silly but it DOES make me feel a lot better afterwards, both physically and mentally.

I still go through pain while doing normal everyday stuff, like lifting a shopping bag, cleaning at work(and at home), driving my car, carrying Molly etc etc (and living out in the country doesn't help this a bit as that leads to a LOT more things having to be done), and while drawing I have to take a break every five minutes or so because it starts to hurt.
But at least that's an improvement, before I couldn't even HOLD a pen with my right hand because it started to hurt so bad.
So slowly but surely I am getting better, I will have to visit the massage therapist a LOT of times which I don't mind at ALL.

The only thing that will change after this is that I am going to (or am already doing) is to use my left hand a LOT more!
I am getting a lot more stable AND quicker with it, so yeah, why not?
I have already said it several times on tumblr that I PLAN to use it as my scething hand in the future, but that has already started to happen really.
Usually while trying to scetch with my right hand I actually end up changing hands in the middle of everything (or redo it all) just because I am actually starting to PREFER to use my left hand for scetching.

I never knew I would end up in that situation, but it's actually a pretty good thing as it spares my right hand from a LOT of work!

So to end this - both hands are getting better, my right hand is still having some issues but my left hand is starting to turn out really good after all of this!
I'm sorry about going on and on about it but once again this is about cts - Carpal Tunnel Syndrom

But this time it's not for my sake, it's for OTHERS sake. Because since I've gotten this I'm surpriced by the amount of people -ESPECIALLY other artists- who have NO idea what it is!

It is a HORRIBLE thing to suffer through as an artist, I wish people could be more aware of it because artists ARE in the riskzone of getting it. It doesn't mean that you WILL get it in the future or anything, I'm just saying that it's (sadly) a big possibility. It's even a bigger chance that you might get it if you are a woman.

So I'm just writing this to maybe make some people more aware of what it is. I am just talking out of my own perspective and some usual symptoms, but it is pretty easy to find information about it online if you just google it!

No mather if anyone reads it or not I still think it's worth to at least MENTION it, who knows, it might help someone out there?

So to start with the most Obvious thing:

-If you get tired by drawing - TAKE A BREAK.

I know everyone is saying it, but you don't understand until you are in a situation like this JUST how important it is to take those breaks and stretch your hands and everything.

I ignored when my hand got tired and kept on working until my hand started going numb and started aching.

I still didn't let it rest enough.

Now this isn't anything that started suddenly, I have had it like that for AGES but it wasn't until 3 months ago that it "finally" burst out and have left my right hand nearly compleatly useless to me.

I don't even think I have to mention that you would NOT want this to happen.

-If your hand start to go numb or tingle while drawing that's NOT a good sign, that's a sign that the nerves inside the carpal tunnel are getting pressed together (if I have understood this right) and not being able to function properly. If this happens - slow things down, take long breaks, consider getting a handbrace to keep your hand in the "right" angle to prevent this from getting worse. Also keeping your wrist warm might help!

-If your hand starts to hurt/go numb during sleep (to the degree that you wake up from it and/or have a hard time sleeping) that's pretty much a sign that you might already have cts, that means it is time to go and talk with a doctor OR -once again- try to wear a handbrace every now and then, even consider wearing one during the night.

It IS uncomfortable at the beginning and it might be hard to sleep with them on, but they DO help as they help you keep your hand steady during sleep. You automatically tend to crook your wrist during sleep which has the same effect as mentioned before - your nerves get "blocked" which causes the symptoms.

Now also consider how many hours you sleep every night, like 6-8 hours? that's a VERY good chance to let your hand rest while being in the "correct" angle!

-For some people it might be cured on their own, not by any medicine but by taking things easy and letting your hand rest enough. IF this doesn't work there IS a high chance that a doctor would want you to go through with an operation which could be worth a shot.

BUT- Keep in mind what they do - they slit open your carpal tunnel so that the nerves will be more free which will take away a lot of the pain, but there IS a high chance that it WILL come back in the future.

As I have mention I'm gonna try light therapy and massage, this does work for some and it means that you might not only be cured, but you do NOT have to worry about an operation that may or may not help, or in some cases, even make things worser. I can't say myself until next week if it has had any effect on me personally, but I do hope it will work!

-IF you feel you have the symptoms mentioned here, consider using your other hand for doing stuff, you DO have two hands after all. BUT keep in mind that your other hand - your non dominant hand - usually gets tired MUCH quicker than your dominant hand. Do NOT overwork it because you risk getting cts in BOTH hands if you are unlucky.

That's what happened to me, I HAVE overworked my left hand which led to getting cts in both hands.

This ended up much longer than I thought it would and I could STILL go on and on about it because I couldn't warn people enough about it. As I started out it's a HORRIBLE thing to go through as an artist and I hope this will at least make SOMEONE out there more aware of what it is.

-as stated in the beginning, I'm talking about my own experience and common symptoms, people can have different symptoms and experiences of it. Even my own mother has different symptoms than I have as she "only" suffers from her hands going numb.

this was originally uploaded on my tumblr… I think it IS worth spreading out, more people NEED to know about this. That's why I'm uploading it here as well
EDIT- so I got in contact with a woman who's gonna try massage and/or light therapy to treat this! I am willing to try almost anything before I even consider making an operation, s I think it's wort a try!
The treatment will start December 1st and I'll have to go there 3-4 times, but I hope this will work :) I will update further after he first visit there!

Sorry for being so inactive, it's not like I have been able to draw much since I have had to wear handbraces on both hands...
I'm not sure when I can get back to drawing or anything honesly, I'm not sure if anyone really cares or not, but this is for my own health >.>

I AM working on a certain thing ATM but I'm not sure if I can even finish it or continue on it due to all the pain, and if I CAN finish it I don't know when I will upload it or IF I will upload it.

Also I got the news that i'm probably getting my old job back, which means that 1. I will be kind of busy with two jobs, and 2. I will be in even MORE pain as I will have to clean all day long :o

I don't feel nice doing this, but I think I might as well go out with a break again, I HATE doing this but I really can't help it atm.

my CTS has NOT gotten any better at all and I am afraid the only choices I have with my right hand is to either ignore the pain or go through with an operation :/ (or find something else that might work, I AM looking for other possibilities :O )

So sorry again people, I don't know when I can be more active, I will visit dA every now and then but I'm not sure when I'll be able to draw stuff at the pace I want to again.

I don't understand how you're supposed to write a journal in there :/

ok anyway, LONON EXPO TODAY!!

if you are there today already it would be cool if you could say hi :D I won't cosplay today but I'll be wearing a shirt like this… (but with the older MUCH larger print) and have a black ugly bag where it says "Valerei" on the top :D
Saturday and Sunday I'll be cosplaying as Karkat from Homestuck, and I'll be there together with NellyOnly and both of us will be looking somewhat like we do in this video ->…

so if you dare to it would be fun if you would say hi or something <3 my english really is horrible, so you'll have to deal with my Swedish accent (and the fact that I forget some words all the time ending up with me asking Nelly for some help in Swedish...xD)
So I went to the doctor today, she made some test to see what would hurt or not, and quickly came to that conclusion that I have carpal tunnel syndrome (… ), I do have some strange symptoms so there might even be more behind it……fml plz?

This MIGHT go away with the right treatment, meaning that I'll have to wear a stupid thing on my hand(fuck english, HANDSKENA FFS.) both at day and night for a month, but at the same time it might not help, which in turn means that they'll have to make an operation.

uggghhhh this put me in such a bad mood you have no idea :I

so yeah, I'm barely allowed to use my right hand for ANYTHING for a month, meaning that I'm not allowed to draw anything for all that time, so yeaaah, you'll have to deal with my left hand art for some more time I guess.
I and :iconnellyonly: made silly videos yesterday ->…
and today we both got the idea to answer some questions like that 8D

ok, as you may guess this is more a tumblr-thingy, but we want to be able to reply to some messages, so it would be awesome with some more :D

so ok, go ahead, ask stuff here -> or here if there's something you want to know/ask, it doesn't have to be about drawing, maybe you want me to say something silly with my horrible accent? something else? (though I probably won't reply to anything sexually or so, Nelly might reply to those though ;P ) now is your chance!

I don't want questions in this journal though I think, so don't go and spam stuff here D: (ok, some are still gonna do this anyway >.> )
hhh I can't believe it, I was in SUCH a bad mood you wouldn't even believe me before because of several different reasons, one of them being that internet was down.
So suddenly it got back and I was like "I should at least check DA before I go to work", so I did....

only to find out I've gotten my very first DD O.o
and on the same drawing that killed my right hand!!
Homestuck tribute by Valerei

So worth it :icondatass:
hhh so many suggested it, thank you all so very much for all the kind words <3 this truly made my day <3

.....oh shit I still need to go to work in just a few minutes D: BUT I LOVE YOU GUYS <3
Edit- well, I might go back from this break faster then expected, not that my right hand is any better, but...

...Well...Being all desperate about drawing I kind of noticed that I'm actually kind of able to draw with my left hand...

I never knew that, I've always made fun of myself of how useless I am at using my left hand ._.

Well anyway, the thing is that I MIGHT upload stuff drawn with my left hand, it would actually be kind of fun to try and do a somewhat serious drawing like that :P
So far it looks like this, but I'm still getting used to this:

I've yet to try and color anything traditionally using my left hand, but what the heck, if I can ink I should be able to color!
So we'll see, I might or might not upload some stuff done with my left hand, but I'm not sure yet xD it would be nice to hear your opinion :)


yes this is shamefully copypasted from my latest drawing as I want to spare my hand from writing as much as possible-

The thing is, ever since that big ass HS-drawing my hand has been hurting like never before, it's been like...over 2 weeks ago since I finished it? and it's been hurting non stop since then...
So anyway, I feel guilty if I don't upload stuff on DA for some stupid reason, so I might as well say that I'm on a break/hiatus so that you won't except some new art for a while.

It may be for only some days, maybe for some weeks, who knows?
The only thing I know is that I'll have to go to a doctor next week if it hasn't gone away by then =_=

I'll still be looking at messages and stuff, but I do HAVE to try avoiding the computer as that doesn't make the pain any better :c

and this does in NO way mean that I don't plan to come back, come on, dA is WAY too addicting for that D:
How about starting with some good news? ALL RIGHT!


I and NellyOnly have now bought the tickets for London mcm in october, so we'll deffinetly be there <3 If anyone would like to meet up that would be awesome ;) I'll probably come with more details later on about how I'll look and so on!

okeeey, then for some NOT so good news, baaw D:


My hand is acting up and is hurting like CRAZY. YES I have drawn way too much in my life so I'm quite used to the pain, but after I finished that huge ass HS-drawing it's been worse then ever before :c so as you might've noticed I've been VERY bad at updating here, and that's the major reason for that...

And then onto some sad news for me that might be considered good by some (eh?)


I probably won't have any job after this thursday, but I don't know anything yet D: and having no job = much more free time = much more time to draw stuff, so...who knows, maybe I can FINALLY get some time to work on my comic and MAYBE even get time to do commissions again, but I don't want to promise ANYTHING >.>

and the last thing that I don't even know what to call so I'll just go for a random Swedish word!


I'm holding a sort of contest at tumblr atm where Im GIVING away things for free :)
That includes a home-made keychain and the originals from this
so yeah, it IS homestuck related but anyway, I don't give away stuff like free all the time you know, but this time I wanted to do something fun for once for the people who follow me, so if you like to join just go here -->… and read about it <3


and that's about all I can think of now! ...errh...*slowly goes back into the corner I came from*

oh dear I really need to sleep
So I and :iconnellyonly: ARE gonna go to London now! :D we have booked tickets and a room at a hotell and stuff <3
we are just aiting for the London mcm tickets (for the one in October) to be released now!


IF we wouldn't managed to get tickets we will still be enjoying this little trip as we've talked about doing this for some years now! And once again, IF we can't get inside we'll probably still go and look at all the people over there, to see what they will cosplay and stuff ;)

and if we DO get tickets inside we're totally gonna cosplay Vriska and Karkat from Homestuck, I'll be Karkat and Nellyonly will be vriska, we're totally gonna look like we fell into gray color and black wigs and got lost AWESOME!!

I hope I'll be able to meet some people from DA, that would be awesome, even though I'm already scared of how bad my English is xD
I'm not even that good at writing in English, and then imagine me speaking it...:c

So if anyone's willing to speak to me I'm gonna be like "OOOH MYYY GOOOD I CAN'T SPEAK AT ALLLL *continues talking forever until Nellyonly tells me to shut up*"
and for you Homestuck-fans, prepare for some horrible sounding Swedish-pronounced names >:D (bara jag och min syster som utalar Karkat som "karr-katt?"? alla verkar säga "car-cat" xD) because I totally can't change the way I read the names!
Thank you so very much for all the birthdaywishes <3
It makes one feel kind of special xD

I'm having a hard time replying to stuff lately, and I'll be busy all this weekend (including today) so I won't be able to reply to all the birthdaywishes ATM *fails*
i'm in fact writing this just before going to work...

Anyway, I'd a very good day, I spent it together with my family, and we ate a LOT of ice cream (as I'm one of those people who doesn't like cake) and I got what I wiished for, which was money for the London-trip!
Yeah, I'm getting a bit old for presents (or is that just me?) but I really want to be able to go there and actually be able to spend some money on stuff and not spend EVERYTHING on travelling and someplace to stay! we need the entry tickets for the con whenever they are released...
oh well, jeez, look a the clock! I really need to go now D: bye!

sorry for being absent for some time, I've been busy reading a CERTAIN comic for a week with almost no breaks except for working and eating.
sooo I am writing this because I and NellyOnly have talked about going to England together for some time now, and we also talked about going to a con while we were there!

and receantly (well, just some days ago) we started talking about maybe cosplaying some characters from a CERTAIN comic, so I got the brilliant idea; why not cosplay them at a con in England if we want to go there anyway?

BRILLIANT IDEA WAS BRILLIANT or so I thought!....Nelly too! HURRAY 8D

urhh...we are thinking about going to London MCM Expo 8D it looks kind of awesome anyway, but here's why I'm writing this;

any of you guys going there? have any of you been there? is it any fun and so on?

any other con worth looking up?

hope I can get some answers! :D

holyfuckishomestuckawesomeorwhat?!?!*personal opinion, you're welcome to have your own*
it doesn't feel like it should be over already, but alas, it is D:

I'm SO tired and should be sleeping now, but I just have to share some photos and stuff :)

let me remind you though, I'm a VERY bad at taking photos, and I didn't get the chance to take that many anyway, but I'll show you the ones I have!

I did plan to take a photo of :iconnellyonly: at our table, but...I somehow forgot about it?
So instead, have a photo of a guy who wanted to try and draw in my style, so he ended up taking over my place at the artists alley, so I just called him "Sissel 2" and let him act as a substitute while I visited other artists!

so pretty xD

So during the whole convention I was living at my great aunts place, and for some reason she has hanged up a certain painting in the room I stayed in..:c

that...might be one of the scariest things I've ever seen! 8C It had to be shown!! D:

And being my usual forgetful self I missed the chance to take a photo of some VERY cool cosplayers, due to my camera being allergic to backlight :C are at least a few of them awesome cosplayers ;)

(childhood friend to the rescue!)

...yes yes I DO happen to like Zelda very much ;)

Anyway, then...........

okeeey, on to the next photo D:

Some stuff I bought at the Artist Alley :D
I bought stuff from :icongabbi: :iconlooneylolita: :icongustavee: :iconattac: :iconnattserier: :iconfoervraengd: :iconvelka: :iconerupan: :iconmwarui: and  :iconfightbeast:
So many awesome people at one place :)

I loved this weekend, I managed to sell a LOT of stuff and say hi to a LOT of people, I really look forward to the next one <3