I told er not to just eat that them there Zap Apples off the tree. But would that young-en listen? Noooooo, had to find out the hard way. She'll be tripping fer the rest of the morn befor she can remotely see straight. Better have big Macintosh tie her up good and tight befer she hurts her self in thinking glass is candy and fire is water or some other dang wird hellloosin-tarnation stuff. Her poor uncle Dump Core thought he had a tree stump growing up his noise and tried to clear it out with a stick of dynamite, when he done the same darn fool darn thing. We doen had to keep picking him out of the trees for over 2 day befer we had enough fer a desent funeral. And you can bet your last bit it was most certainly a closed affair on that one. Poor old cus, never was too bright when it came to the think part of life.
- Granny Smith.