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Ultraq's avatar


My first wallpaper in a long time, and one of my most emotive pieces to date.

On the morning of a weekend I particularly looked forward to, I was told some rather shocking news over MSN; news that turned my world upside-down. Couple that with the number of books I am reading at the moment, and I tried my best to attach a narrative to that morning:

"If this were told to me in-person, I would not have been able to mask my reactions: my hands started shaking, I began a light sweat, my stomach felt as if it were twisting in on itself, and my vision blurred as my eyes desperately tried to focus on some truth behind the words that were displayed on the screen; as if there were some meaning hidden between the pixels to reassure me that what I had just read was all a joke.

Suffice it to say, the impact was great and heavy. The final pillar holding-up the view of the world I loved and held dear - finally taken away from its supporting role by none other than the owner of that pillar - now to be used as an exclamation mark to close the sentence that described an era that had been the best of my life."

Truth be told, the news isn't actually bad, just something that has hit me harder than the euphoria that should be associated with it. I should be supportive, or glad, but all I feel is... I don't know: less significant, stupid...

...and alone.

The picture, and my attempts to describe that moment with metaphor, were my outlets to help me cope with the situation. I poured so much of that emo angst into it, so you don't really even need to be an abstract thinker to see the correlation between that picture, and my story. The picture and writing have helped, but not entirely. I'm going to let time deal to the rest of it, although time and I have never been on the best of terms.

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© 2005 - 2021 Ultraq
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DarkSlinky's avatar
The colours are amazing.
you're very good at what you do.
I hope you find peace in your life. :)
vcr89's avatar
they say the stars are always shining, but we don't see them until the darkest hours. Shine on.
khorask's avatar
Looks nice... good colors but a little to much contrast for me...

good work
j3st3r312's avatar
A breathtaking piece to say the least... IMHO pefection in your color usage and the sublties (the ghosted letters behind sacrafices... the lights on the planets) are very well done... I'm glad the piece could be an outlet for you, the emotion obviously carried over... Maybe that's what speaks to me, I know the feeling of having no idea how to handle your emotions to the point where all you can do is lock up or express yourself or find some other outlet entirely too well... I don't know how comforting that can be, but weither i can relate to your experiances, your description of your emotions rang very very true.
RockerDude96's avatar
Very, very nice. If you don't mind me asking, just what was the news?
Ultraq's avatar
Without giving-away too much, let's just say that everyone around me is growing-up, moving-on with their lives, and I feel kinda left behind.
(apologies for the late reply, I was on a nice New Year's holiday; just what I needed to take my mind of things such as this, and let me face the new year with a bit more confidence)
RockerDude96's avatar
ahhh, yeah I know the feeling.
RogueWanderer's avatar
wow, that is brilliant ^^
TheEmerald's avatar
:eyepopping: Great job! :D Keep up the wonderful work! :heart:
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