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Say something...

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...I'm giving up on you
I'll be the one, if you want me to
Anywhere, I would've followed you
Say something, I'm giving up on you

And I... am feeling so small
It was over my head
I know nothing at all

And I will stumble and fall
I'm still learning to love
Just starting to crawl

Say something, I'm giving up on you
I'm sorry that I couldn't get to you
Anywhere, I would've followed you
Say something, I'm giving up on you

And I will swallow my pride
You're the one that I love
And I'm saying goodbye

Say something, I'm giving up on you
And I'm sorry that I couldn't get to you
And anywhere, I would've followed you, oh-oh
Say something, I'm giving up on you

Say something, I'm giving up on you
Say something...

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-


Every stride sent a wave of dull, aching pain through her tender white paws and up her thin legs, but on Kaia ran.  At this point, she couldn't remember how long she'd been running.  There was only one thing on her mind.  She had to get away...away from Loki...away from all of those shocked, terrified faces...away from all of it.  How could this happen...how could the Astir do this...?!  Vale wasn't just a territory, it was their home...her home - the only one she'd ever known.  They were a family.  Families didn't do this.  They didn't tear each other apart and leave each other to fend for themselves.

It was all wrong.

Her vision blurring as her eyes began to well up with tears, Kaia couldn't see where the ground shifted unevenly ahead, and it was all it took to bring her frantic flight to an abrupt end.  Her right shoulder dipped down as she lost her footing then the rest of her body followed, lurching and tumbling several feet before she finally skidded to a stop on her side in the long grass.  A sharp tendril of pain shot through her wrist, and she gritted her teeth.  It wasn't supposed to be this way.  As the dust around her settled, the quiet of the evening returned to envelope the field Kaia now found herself in.  The birds had already returned to their nests, and the other small fauna settled in for the night.  The sun which had been hanging low in the sky upon her departure from the group had gone, and a pale, eerie moon amidst a mass of storm clouds had taken its place, occasionally giving everything a soft, silvery glow whenever it broke through the cloud cover.  Kaia's left ear flicked toward a faint rumble of distant thunder, then closed her eyes as the faintest sprinkle of raindrops caressed her face.  She laid there for what felt like hours in silence, helpless...alone.

Eventually, she was jerked to her senses by a much louder crack of thunder.  She couldn't stay here.  The worsening weather made it clear she would need to find shelter soon.  With a soft whimper and a grit of her teeth, she managed to pull herself up into a sitting position, though the young she-wolf's head hung limply between her shoulders.  It was gone...it was really gone.  Another loud burst of thunder rippled across the sky and suddenly the world around her was blanketed by a downpour.  It was only then that the floodgates burst and the torrent of tears that had been building all this time spilled over and streaked down her face, accompanying the rain.  Sobs shook Kaia's body, starting small at first then growing into violent, high-pitched wails.  She howled.  She screamed at the ground, demanding it tell her why this was happening to her.  Momma...Liz...Charlie...Levi...where would they all go?  Nothing made sense anymore.  Everything seemed so hopeless.

At last, the sobs slowly subsided into soft cries, her forelegs trembling in utter exhaustion.  She had to face the truth.  Vale...was gone.



The past six months have been...extremely rough, especially the last three.  I've already lost my Nana mentally to dementia and now I may be losing her physically as well.  She was really the only normal grandparent I had growing up, given my other two grandparents both suffer from bipolar disorder and mental instability in general.  In addition to this and an utterly hectic school schedule, I thought I had met someone who was potentially "the one".  Everything just seemed to click between us, and I truly fell for him, head over heels...  After going through so much heartbreak in my past, it took a lot for me to learn to trust someone again.  But I trusted him...I thought he was different...  Yet, after calling me precious and saying he was attached to me, he broke things off less than a week later, which afterwards I found out he'd been seeing another girl for some time before he ended things with me.  I'd been used and discarded again, just as I've been multiple times before before.  Then just recently, after many mixed messages and feeling like he was continuing to string me along, I called him out on what he'd done to me and ended our friendship, because I wasn't going to be taken advantage of anymore and I needed actual time away if I was ever going to heal from the experience.  But instead of respecting me and how I felt, he turned vindictive and started spreading rumors behind my back that I wasn't worth being in a relationship with.  And for someone who already struggles with depression and self-worth...that's the most cruel, heartbreaking thing you can say.  When you already have that voice in your head constantly telling you you're not worth it...to hear someone else actually say it...words can't describe how awful of a feeling that is.  All I can say is that even if you're hurt or angry...even if you feel disrespected...please think of how your words may affect others.  A lot of times, people seem like they're strong and have everything together when they're really just trying to keep their head above water.  You have no idea what could be happening in their lives.

Given all this, understandably my creative passion has been running dry, and I've barely had time to think as of lately with my schedule, which is why I've been so absent from DotW.  When Vale disbanded, I also felt like the one thing I'd been waiting two years for had just up and dissolved as soon as I got to be a part of it.  So safe to say this piece is pretty symbolic for not only Kaia but myself as well.  I'm not terribly happy with the sloppy sketch feel, though in a way it's more raw and heart-felt as opposed to the "perfectly clean" lineart and color I usually strive for.  Hopefully I've made it through the thick of the storm and will be coming out on the other side soon.  My schedule should lighten up after mid-May, so God-willing I should have most evenings free again after that for the rest of the summer.  I want to thank the DotW admins for being so gracious, patient, and understanding during these tough times.  Heart



:icongroupthing1plz::icongroupthing1-2plz::icongroupthing1-3::icondomain-of-the-wolf::icongroupthing2plz::icongroupthing2-2plz::icongroupthing2-3plz:
+1 bone for Kaia [1 ct Illustration]
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Kaia
ReferenceBone Tracker | Medallion

"Every day is a journey, and the journey itself is home."
- Matsuo Basho


Kaia © TyraDragoness (me)

Credits: Rain Texture © incolor16
Image details
Image size
1024x1583px 1.55 MB
Published:
© 2019 - 2021 TyraDragoness
Comments5
anonymous's avatar
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dragonfreak1112's avatar
Guyman543212345's avatar
Cry thunder
Sword in his hand
Warriors defending
One final stand
Zoketi's avatar
my baby ;W; <33 this is so moving hhhh 
i'm sorry for all your recent struggles and i hope things get brighter soon!!! <3
PheonixStarman's avatar
Oh dear poor Kaia... I just hope she's alright... I just love the scene and parody ;_; :heart: So emotional