I wanna vent, I'm tired and angry, and depressed, but I don't know how to put it into words. There is a lot of things that make me this way but I completely lost the words I wanted to say! Long in short of it, my mom's job and her own mother is making it more and more stressful for her and for me to, I am still unemployed, I have little to no friends in real life, I have to put up with bias bigotry and anti-sjw bs all over the internet, I have to drive a lot and it's stressful, and even though I had all summer to do more art work I barely did any; I have a rough cintiq monitor at home, and even then I still wouldn't know what to write for my stories or how to draw something, and there's always something in real life to detract me from what I want to do, and both online and in person anything I say or do can be a big mistake that'll make me regret who I am. It also doesn't help I tend to have post-traumatic stress so I tend to remember bad things from my past every now and then.
I made no secret that I want to be an artist, I want to have a career in animation and make shows or even films for everyone to enjoy; I also want to write my own stories for people to enjoy as well. In general I love to create and share. But there are always factors holding me back, and not a single day goes by without me fearing of being an insignificant nobody wasting his life away when he has so much potential for something greater! But at the end of the day I wonder...
Is fame really even worth it?! Considering all the scandals that turn up, or generally how many of the people we admire turn out to be complete monsters; and aside from that there's also the risk that your work may not get picked up anyway for whatever reason, and even if it does, the people you work for may just stab you in the back so they can take what's yours and suck it dry.
So again, is it even worth it?!
I'm not looking for other people's sympathy, I shouldn't have to spill details of my personal life but I need an outlet; I'm sad, angry, stressed, and confused; and I don't know what else to do.