Shop Forum More Submit  Join Login


Smart, intelligent, funny,
Are just a few words that pop into my head...
When I think of you.

The moon and all the stars in the sky,
seem to twinkle twice as bright...
When I think of you.

Your hair, your face, your smile,
glow radiantly in my mind...
When I think of you.

I feel as if I am burning,
yet it is that of my heart yearning for your love...
When I think of you.

My feelings are intensified,
only begging for the touch of your flesh...
When I think of you.

My mind is tossing like an ocean;
not knowing what to choose.
And my feelings shall never subside,
until I have locked you safely into my arms.

But for now I can only be swallowed into a vast world of daydreaming,
where the thoughts and my desires for you are endless...
When I think of you.
*AHEM* Welcome...welcome...

This is my *first* poem that I have ever submitted on devart!! :clap: And, knowing the comments I will receive on it, probably my last too :blush: So, be nice...I'm not a poet, so don't make fun of me!! :lol:

I don't know what really "insprired" (if you can call it that) this poem...I started with the first verse, and it was about a friend, and then I kind of drifted off to a sappy poem. So this poem is mainly about obssession and lust, and never getting who you want...that kind of miserable and pathetic stuff, LOL! :giggle:

:clap: ENJOI! :clap:
Add a Comment:
 
:iconconsciencecomatose:
ConscienceComatose Featured By Owner Jul 15, 2004
i like it...i can feel the love...and it's not all sad and depressing. good work!
Reply
:icontoymachine11:
toymachine11 Featured By Owner Jul 15, 2004
thank u very much :) glad u enjoyed it :highfive:
Reply
:iconsimmo:
simmo Featured By Owner Jun 18, 2004   Writer
Great poem, I have thought that way a lot of times. :+fav: Great Job :D
Reply
:icontoymachine11:
toymachine11 Featured By Owner Jun 19, 2004
thanks, i really appreciate it! :D :glomp:
Reply
:iconed-is-dead:
ed-is-dead Featured By Owner May 8, 2004   Writer
this is a nice little love letter, but as a piece of art it doesn't work very well, because of something Paul Muldoon (a great poet) said while giving a talk at my school: every poem must have a disturbing element to it. It's all balance, nothing in life is all good or all bad. If you paint a picture that is, it isn't believable, there's no contrast.

- Ed
Reply
:icontoymachine11:
toymachine11 Featured By Owner May 8, 2004
thanks for the tip :nod:
Reply
:iconed-is-dead:
ed-is-dead Featured By Owner May 8, 2004   Writer
[link] Paul Muldoon's site
it's got him reading some of his poems, which is wonderful

just for the hell of it, a Charles Bukowski [link] site; if not my favorite writer, one of them

hope you enjoy that stuff
Reply
:icontoymachine11:
toymachine11 Featured By Owner May 8, 2004
thanks, i love reading poetry! :heart: :)
Reply
:iconed-is-dead:
ed-is-dead Featured By Owner May 8, 2004   Writer
groovy
Reply
:iconed-is-dead:
ed-is-dead Featured By Owner May 8, 2004   Writer
repeat: no worries :)
Reply
:iconchloe-brody:
Chloe-Brody Featured By Owner May 1, 2004
This is great - I wish I wrote it! :D The person who you wrote it about must be pretty damn special :cuddle:
Reply
:icontoymachine11:
toymachine11 Featured By Owner May 2, 2004
:faint: you really think so?? lol!
Reply
:iconchloe-brody:
Chloe-Brody Featured By Owner May 2, 2004
Definitely!
Reply
:iconxxtfcxx:
xxtfcxx Featured By Owner Mar 24, 2004
It's not bad, actually it's pretty good, and I'm not just saying that like your stalker fanclub. Love poems are all about passion and you covered it pretty well, nice job!
Reply
:icontoymachine11:
toymachine11 Featured By Owner Mar 24, 2004
whee! :dance: thanks alot!! :D
Reply
:iconj-mart:
J-Mart Featured By Owner Mar 20, 2004
I think it's a great poem! I can relate in some ways too.
Reply
:icontoymachine11:
toymachine11 Featured By Owner Mar 20, 2004
thanks :D
Reply
:iconameon:
ameon Featured By Owner Mar 17, 2004   Digital Artist
and do you know why there's no moon in my sky?
do you know why i won't break down and cry?
do you know why ther's a life without lie?

...

nice poem :clap:
Reply
:icontoymachine11:
toymachine11 Featured By Owner Mar 17, 2004
:O ooohhh, thats good! did u write that yourself?? ur exellent! :clap:

thanks alot :hug: :)
Reply
:iconameon:
ameon Featured By Owner Mar 18, 2004   Digital Artist
:hug:
Reply
:iconmetchim:
metchim Featured By Owner Feb 22, 2004
i jus realised the date on that!!!! i only jus got it!!! i'm like soooo out of date.lol. sorry
Reply
:iconmetchim:
metchim Featured By Owner Feb 22, 2004
i jus realised the dat on that!!!! i only jus got it!!! i'm like soooo out of date.lol. sorry
Reply
:iconmetchim:
metchim Featured By Owner Feb 22, 2004
HEY YA!!!! nice poem, me likes it alot :D i think its something everyone can relate to in one way or another so that a good thing (well i think) anyways hope to see some more poems soon, great work :hug:
Reply
:icontoymachine11:
toymachine11 Featured By Owner Feb 22, 2004
lol, thankies :D :w00t: :hug:
Reply
:iconkoodwatch:
Koodwatch Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2004
hey First verse is about me :D

hnah hnah hnah... ;)

Really good poem, good title and mood ahh wish to be that guy ;)

I like it ... hmmm where is that guy when you can only deram about him

is he just reflection of a perfection? :D
Reply
:icontoymachine11:
toymachine11 Featured By Owner Feb 22, 2004
lol, of course the first verse is about u!!!!! :worship:

:confused: hmm, maybe u r that guy;) lol, j/k, i didn't know u before i wrote the poem :( lol

i wonder if he is? :thinking:
Reply
:iconkoodwatch:
Koodwatch Featured By Owner Feb 22, 2004
hehe :D


;)
Reply
:iconsexxy21:
seXXy21 Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2004
wow for that being your first one you did really really well. And I know what your talking about because well, I guess I kinda went through it.
Reply
:icontoymachine11:
toymachine11 Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2004
thank ya! :D much appreciated :)
Reply
:iconbrokensoulfalling:
BrokenSoulFalling Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2004
Congatulations! You just became 5X hotter!
Reply
:icontoymachine11:
toymachine11 Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2004
lmao lmao :blush: teehehe, thanks :D :hug:
Reply
:iconbrokensoulfalling:
BrokenSoulFalling Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2004
=o WOW
Reply
:iconxtr3me:
xtr3me Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2004
And to think you said you were rubbish at poetry ;) :hug:

Gaz
Xtr3me
Reply
:icontoymachine11:
toymachine11 Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2004
lol :blushes: thanks :hug: :)
Reply
:icondiligent2003:
diligent2003 Featured By Owner Feb 8, 2004
wow. thats really good
Reply
:icontoymachine11:
toymachine11 Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2004
thanks so much :D :hug:
Reply
:icondiligent2003:
diligent2003 Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2004
your welcome
Reply
:iconsarahsoda182:
sarahsoda182 Featured By Owner Jan 18, 2004
this is lovely syl!.. and wow, you can SPELL!.. youre not as dumb as you seem! .. (omg im just kidding. OF COURSE ur as dumb as u seem!..lmao ok im jk again) good job. who is the friend, huh? I WANNA KNOOOO.. XD
Reply
:icontoymachine11:
toymachine11 Featured By Owner Jan 18, 2004
lol, i'll never teellllllll...lol. and of course i can speel! duh! lmao :giggle: XD
Reply
:iconsarahsoda182:
sarahsoda182 Featured By Owner Jan 18, 2004
lol!.. why wont u tell?? :( *sniffle* i feel.. SO LEFT OUT!.. *cough*.. ok well actually i dont care, but im quite curious! (thank god curiosity killed the CAT and not the BAT! :D :batman: heehee)
Reply
:icon-dexter-:
-dexter- Featured By Owner Jan 16, 2004
oh very nice indeed... i love it.. and yeah like the first person said i can relate to it as well... ah well :) nice poem
Reply
:icontoymachine11:
toymachine11 Featured By Owner Jan 18, 2004
:w00t: glad you like it!! :) :hug: :blush:
Reply
:iconpunker-fish:
punker-fish Featured By Owner Jan 16, 2004
uh oh..syl+poetry=frightened ro@die...
Reply
:icontoymachine11:
toymachine11 Featured By Owner Jan 18, 2004
hhheeeyyy...:heartbreaker:
Reply
:iconobliviousupergrl:
obliviousupergrl Featured By Owner Jan 16, 2004
well said! i can relate t_t
Reply
:icontoymachine11:
toymachine11 Featured By Owner Jan 18, 2004
aww, thats a good thing :) yay! thank ya 4 the comment;)
Reply
Add a Comment:
 
×

:icontoymachine11: More from toymachine11


More from DeviantArt



Details

Submitted on
January 16, 2004
File Size
1.0 KB
Link
Thumb

Stats

Views
851
Favourites
6 (who?)
Comments
46
×