Timmy the Reaper
Created by Tyler Gates
Warning: This written series is overly ridiculous and may cause some readers to go "wtf". Oh, it also has some nasty themes and gore n' stuff too.
"What We (Don't) Fear"
(o.o) If there's one thing you gotta admire the most about the Golden Girls - more so than their close friendships, frequent humour, or Blanche's slutty ways pre-dating that of Samantha Jones - it's the sheer fact that they always discussed their problems while eating cheesecake.
Tick, tock, tick, tock, tick, tock
the big hand on the classroom's clock face slams closer to three post meridiem. [(o.o) That's PM, just in case you didn't get that reference, which is likely since you people are mostly idiots] Jazz feels the sweat trickle down her forehead while she keeps her sight fixated on the clock. Ms Irk narrows her beady eyes into that of a leer behind her granny glasses; the demon watching Jazz intently as Jazz watches the clock intently in a very intense moment of intently-ness. Tick, tock, tick, tock, tick, tock, clunk! The hand hits three [(o.o) And is charged with assault
] as the school bell rings throughout the building's empty halls, signaling Jazz's cue to escape.
The little girl rushes to the door to leave, not even taking her tower of textbooks with her this time as she hurries for survival. However, to her dismay the exit is quickly blocked by the hasty movement of Irk, who hisses with her forked-tongue flickering. The lanky demon leans her wrinkled face in close to Jazz's.
"Run, girl. Run like it's your last day ALIVE!" Irk's breath of decay and death almost kills the wheezing girl right there.
Jazz darts past the tall figure and out of the building. [(o.o) Some of you may be asking why Jazz would decide to go to school at all while knowing her teacher is a demon, plotting to kill her. Well, allow me to answer that question with perpetual silence on the matter
------Elsewhere in Some City------
The warm shine from the sun is suddenly replaced by the cold grey of storm clouds moving overhead. Thunder claps like a retarded audience while sheets of rain start to fall upon the city. Timmy and Scythe enter the small residence of their second-to-last Named of the day Madam Luni.
Moving through the narrow hallway towards the kitchen, the Reaper glances uncomfortably at the decorative shrunken heads, gruesome statues, and relics of times long forgotten. A terrible stench begins to burn the insides of Timmy's nose and cause his eyes to water. [(o.o) And remember, this guy has dealt with a lot of corpses and rotten smells before]
"What's that smell~? IT REEKS!"
The pair finally reaches the kitchen and lays their sights upon an ominous redhead with a mass of thin, curly hair, and watches as she stands at the kitchen stove, stirring a cauldron the source of the devastating smell.
"She's a SPAGHETTI-HEAD~! Ahahaha!" Timmy then notices the crystal ball resting at the kitchen table's centre.
Madam Luni suddenly turns her attention towards the two behind her.
"I'm just preparing my dinner, so I'll be right with you."
The Reaper gives a slight look of disgust, "THAT'S your dinner? That's gross, and I bathe in moose-spit so that's saying something."
Madam Luni simply smirks. "I've been expecting you."
Timmy sighs, though this time with an ounce of frustration. "Were you now? Well it seems everyone these days is 'expecting' me! Well, it's not like it does you any good, since you all die anyway!"
Luni moves the cauldron off the flaming stove and onto the table, forgetting to turn off the heat. [(o.o) You just know that's going to end up being a bad mistake
"Relax. I was just fuckin' with you. That crystal ball there does shit all; I just leave it there to make me look genuine. Who are you anyway, some diehard Timmy the Reaper fan or something? You're pretty good with not moving your lips whenever you talk as that scythe," the woman approaches the little Reaper, "but you know, that urban legend is dying out now. It got overshadowed by rumours involving obese, slug alien abductions. God, people rave on so much shit these da-" suddenly Madam Luni's eyes widen in pure, shocking terror.
Before her, Timmy stands now shrouded and writhed in his roaring Death Cloak of energy. His eyes dripping with black substance as his face creases in extreme irritation. "For the last time
I am not cosplaying Timmy, I am not acting as Timmy I AM Timmy THE REAPER!"
Timmy's Death Cloak then kicks off in forms of tentacle limbs, smacking Madam Luni backwards across the kitchen and onto the flaming stove which quickly ignites her.
Scythe laughs in amusement at Luni's screams of anguish, staring as she collapses onto the floor, engulfed in flames.
"Ahahahaha! Redheads have always been fiery~!"
Timmy deactivates the Death Cloak and steps over to Luni. Slashing into her, the Reaper forces blood and flames to fall across the kitchen, and in mere moments the entire house comes ablaze.
------Several minutes and a shifted-scene later------
Timmy and Scythe head down the nearest street, the rain now pouring heavily.
"Scythe, show me the last Named for today."
"OKI-DOKI~!" Timmy glances at the weapon's blade and watches as a name forms from the fresh blood of Madam Luni
-----Meanwhile at the SRRA-----
Agent Shroom and a sleeping RYE are alerted by LuCy.
[ ♀ ] Time is now convenient: calculations complete.
Agent Shroom's eyes light up with anticipation. "Who? Who is Timmy's next victim?!"
Timmy reads the name formed from the blood. "Jazz, huh? That's a weird name."
Scythe giggles. "Hehe, sounds like 'jizz'~!"
To Be Disembodied
We bring you this important notification to sadly inform you all that the Timmy the Reaper series has been cancelled. Instead, a new written series titled Once You See It, It Will Slap You in the Face will be published consecutively every Sunday, starting with its first chapter, "Hell in Hello". Think we're bullshitting? Well we are! How could you tell?
(o.o) Don't miss the final chapter of Timmy the Reaper. The End is close don't you want to be a part of it?