from my own mind.
I usually don't do this, but it's late enough for me to be exhausted yet unusually active, so have some babbling.Actually, maybe I do usually do this. Am I getting old for the adolescent journals?
Work has been incredibly stressful on me lately. While I definitely feel valued where I'm at, it's also a job that I landed, more than the job I'd have chosen if I could have chosen - and I find myself struggling with the company ideals (which are in conflict with my own), and with the endless issues that come up every day. I was never good at separating work life and private life, and with the position I currently have, the line becomes blurry as I'm always reachable on my phone - and while it's definitely handy, it leads to people thinking you are always at their disposal, which is incorrect, and sort of disrespectful as it seems to assume I don't have a life of my own.
I think that it would be easier to manage, feelings-wise, if this same situation had taken place in my home country. But here, I feel without a support network of any kind - and it's hard to confide in my friends back in Italy, because as sad as it is, my relationship with them has changed dramatically. We're not as close as we used to be, in every sense of the word.
they are "best friends" I can't open my heart to anymore when it comes to certain things.
And then there is a thing in my life, with a peculiar orbit of its own; that moves away for a while, as the seasons go, but always eventually comes back. I think the reason why everything has been stressing me more than usual lately is that this feeling made its way back to me, and it won't let go. And while the easy solution is of course "talk about it and get it off your chest"... yeah.
not everything can be cured that way, haha.
I need a vacation. Anyone have a couch I can sink in?
I come with the incredible perk of "watch me as I sleep for 14 hours straight, and then maybe we can do something together."
And last but not least, how are you