Just something that's been on my mind for a while now.....
Warning, this post is not for the faint of heart nor for young people. If you read this post, you do so at your own discretion.
Something of mine that I have wanted for a very long time now in real life. Been looking for online for at least 14 to 15 years. Have tried many many different websites and resources to attempt to find it. Yet, in my mind, its something stupidly simple and easy to do, just no one wants to do it to me or for me.
What is it you might ask? I want to be kept chained by the neck. Forced to wear a metallic collar around my neck, locked in place for the rest of my life. Or at least, a length of chain wrapped around my neck snugly that's locked in place, for the rest of my life. Never freed or released from it. With the other end of this chain bolted down, locked or otherwise secured to a solid location, like around a pole/post that I cannot move or some stake in the ground. To be given say no more then 20 to maybe 30 feet at the very most forth of freedom. Enough to move around, do my business, eat, sleep, be hydrated and anything else that might be needed for me to do to live.
The things I don't want:
#1: I don't want any sexual relationship of any kind. What I consider sexual is anything to do with trading bodily juices with each other. This does include having to watch others in their sexual acts, such as porn or the real thing. Very very squeamish about this. I don't consider cuddling, hugging, snuggling, petting/rubbing, scritching/scratching and just generally being close to someone as 'sexual'.
#2: Pain for pleasure or punishment.... I don't want any of this. No beating, spanking, hurting physically or mentally.
#3: Not any 'toilet' sort of play/use such as scat or watersports.
#4: Not to be left alone or ignored.
#5: Not to be locked inside of a cage or in any enclosed room that I would need a key to leave. If I'm not to be given access to some room though, that's fine or have it so the chain does not allow me to reach that point.
#6: No kitty, puppy or pony play/dress up situations. Not really something I am into.
#7: No large groups that could cause me to be overwhelmed. I can only mentally keep up with at most 2 to 3 people.
#8: Not really looking for a Dom or Dommie, anything that would be more in the way of BDSM as that's pretty extreme.
The things I do want:
#1: Being comforted or being able to comfort others with just my presence and being close. Much like an animal pet is to most people. While I understand we might have differences and heated arguments or opinions, as long as we work through them we'll be able to better ourselves. If nothing more, just walk away and give me space without ridiculing me for needing that space.
#2: Help with control of my diet. This doesn't mean force me to eat some things or demand that I 'try it first', but at least help me to be able to eat healthier. I can give a listing of what I do like and what I don't like if desired.
#3: Given access to something I might be able to use for exercising in my reach. Something like a stationary bike comes to mind with a place I might be able to place the chain so it is out of the way.
#4: Access to a bathroom without having to be unchained to be able to use it. Something with a shower would work, doesn't need to be a full on bathroom.
#5: Perhaps kept for the most part in a central room rather then a side one, such as like a living room rather then a bedroom.
#6: If I could get outside partly, would be nice too... Though unless hidden very well, this might not be an option.
#7: Positive reinforcements and praising. I mentioned before just to give me space if things are getting heated... rather then demeaning me mentally or physically (See above).
#8: If I 'paw off', let me without taking it as a license to hound me for sexual favors....
#9: Partial clothing such as undershorts and sweat style shorts or pants. Button up shirts would be nice too for cooler/colder months.
#10: Be a part of a small group and be able to socialize without being interrupted.
#11: Access to the kitchen with fresh ingredients. I do like to cook from time to time. Not required though.
Middle ground area: (Things I have encountered but have no real experience with.)
#1: Having to call someone Sir, Master, Ma'am, Mistress. Something I might forget about but don't want to be treated unkindly if I do forget about it.
#2: Taken out for walks or to go places. I would prefer to be chained 24/7/365 but might welcome a little release from that confinement now and then.
These lists will likely be added to over time or modified if I think of something I might have missed.
Closing statement: I should mention that I am emotionally 'broken' cause of how people have treated me before in the past cause of my desire. Kind of one of the reasons why my list is the way it is. I have mental disabilities dealing with emotional control, leading and landing within the autism spectrum. I don't want anything that would cause this condition to worsen so no mental hospitals or clinics... and no telling me 'Oh, I should take medication for this.' The only medicine I'm likely to take, if I have access to it, would be the occasional pain pill or allergy/sinus pill. And maybe a vitamin supplement or two. Though with that, I would prefer if my diet by nature supplied the vitamins I need.
Hopefully this posting won't get removed or deleted cause of its nature.
I'll add or modify things in this post when I think of them or someone mentions about them.
Would really love it if this could happen before my next birthday / hatching day which comes just a little after mid December.
Been waiting and wanting something like this for the last 30 plus years roughly at least. Don't really remember my original draw to wanting to be bound and kept, just something I've always wanted. So for those of you who are out there who keep saying 'Be patient', I think I've been patient enough. No one should have to wait a quarter of their life for something to happen. Yeah, I can understand a year or two years maybe but not 30 plus.
Tired of false promises and hopes. This goes for chats as well as going for the real deal. You want me, then here I am.... don't beat around the bush about it. Tired of hearing the same excuses over and over again. I've gone half way across the country, spending my own money chasing this dream... to the point that I am in debt. Been left high and dry, left on the wayside.
Just...idle thoughts, don't mind me.