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ProtC Prologue: Page Five

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I've redone this page twice trying to get the dialogue flow right, and I still think it needs another redo. This is going to have to do for now. Poor Jahrd's just not quite getting the hint, is he? Although maybe he's got a point there. Not necessarily an original point - you can bet others have thought the same thing - but a point nonetheless.

Edit: At the suggestion of a wise reader, I switched some of the panel art around. Hopefully the result is clearer. :3

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Prophecy of the Circle: Tangent, page five. For more info see the official site at www.prophecyofthecircle.com.

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hannahmcgill's avatar
Still liking the traditional media touch to these. :)

In the last two panels, the direction of the character faces are confusing--In panel four, the green guy is facing right, then in panel five, it's the brown guy facing right. It's reading as a zoom-out panel, and the switch to a different character in the same position confused me momentarily.

Try flipping panel four so that green guy faces left, and put panel four on the right corner of the page so that it becomes the new fifth panel. Adjust the positions of the text bubbles and see if that reads as more smooth. :heart:

I can draw a doodle if that would help, I'm having a hard time conveying my suggestion in text.

Anyway, keep it up!