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About Varied / Artist Max HarmonyUnited States Group :iconyouthrights: youthrights
 
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Deviant for 10 Years
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Literature
Bird Haiku
Birds, mere silhouettes,
Flying in a leaveless tree
On a cold grey sky.
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Literature
Induction Day
As the lights dimmed, I wondered how I had gotten into this situation. Last night I had a perfectly normal life, but now this. I was now a member of this nation's armed services. I definitely didn't want to, but it was hardly unexpected. They were drafting everyone. They first lifted the men-only restriction, then the 18-26 restriction. I would have qualified from the beginning, of course, but I somehow escaped their notice. Until now. While I was at the café, sipping a mocha, no less than three men (one each from the Army, Navy, and Air Force) in full dress uniform stepped in. I felt a chill, but dismissed it. After all, they had just opened an exterior door on a cold day. Then they came to my table. I felt my throat tense, and one (he looked like the highest-ranked, but what did I know?) said "you've been selected. You are to come with us or face charges of treason. Treason during wartime carries a sentence--" "I know, I know", I said, "treason during wartime carries the death p
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Literature
Telemarketers and Police
The phone rang. RIIIIIIIING once. Again. Thrice. I ignored it, and it let out one feeble half ring before voicemail picked it up. I'd have to see who it was later. Couldn't have been anyone important; they'd have IM'd me instead. People know I'm almost always online. Honestly, the only reason I have a phone is for a few people who don't have computers, and work. Well, I do have a mobile phone for when I'm away from home, but that's not what's ringing. Ringing AGAIN. It must be a telemarketer. I guess I'll pick up and teach them to STOP CONTACTING ME BECAUSE I AM POOR AND DO NOT WANT YOUR CRAP. I pick up, and in a fake-automated voice I say "Hello. You have reached our automated billing line. Please enter your order number."
"Wait, what? Is this John Epps? At 631-813-7861?"
I laugh. "Hahaha, yeah, it is. Sorry, I just put the baby in the oven and I really don't want to be interrupted."
"Oh, that's alright. I'll just call back later."
"No", I say, "you don't understand. I don't want to b
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Literature
Professor Hildeg's Car
Dammit. I have three days left to write this essay. "Spontaneous regenerative autonomous cellularly-inspired growth of non-organic pseudolifeforms". What the fuck does that even mean? Well, actually, I know exactly what it means. That doesn't mean it actually makes sense. This essay, you see, is about looking at cells-- like in the human body, not a prison cell, though if I were in the latter I'd certainly have a good excuse for not turning this in-- and using their growth-- which is "spontaneous and autonomous" which basically means it happens on its own (there's a slight difference between the words, but not enough for anyone to actually care about, other than my professor anyway)-- to get non-organic pseudolifeforms (so basically things that pretend to be alive but aren't) to fix themselves. That would be a better-explained topic ("how to make cars fix themselves"), but my professor likes to use the proper SCIENTIFIC words. He can get stuffed, incidentally.
So, three days to write a
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Literature
Untitled Gender Experiment
"Ugh!", I shouted, "What IS the vile muck?"
"It's merely horse excrement and urine. It's quite beneficial to your health.". Ugh. Of course. Micheal. He liked to be called Mikey, but I certainly wasn't going to do that for him after THAT comment. I considered getting some form of revenge, but of course he'd probably hurt me for it.
I'm Dora. I absolutely despised Micheal (actually, I still do!). Even though he knows I hate him, he's always hitting on me. Or completely screwing things up, like he just did. Well, he would be completely screwing things up if he'd had a chance in the first place. I glanced over to my friend Sylvia, who shook her head slightly. She mouthed "it's just some nasty flavouring" to me, and I calmed down a bit. Not much, of course, since I HAD just been told I was drinking horse shit. Of course, people who had otherwise not been paying attention somehow noticed that I calmed down after looking at Sylvia. Great. This would only fuel the rumours that we're secretly d
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Literature
Sinking Ship
"What is this?!", I cried. An alarm was going off somewhere. Even though I'd been drilled for weeks on the sound and meaning of every alarm, and passed the test with a perfect score, actually hearing this was different. Very different. Someone shouted back, "I think it's just a fire", but another, this one with the authority of the Captain's voice coming over the PA system, warned us otherwise: "we are facing armed attack from a terrorist group strongly suspected to posses nuclear weapons". Terrorists with nuclear weapons were attacking us? I didn't even know terrorists had nuclear weapons at all! The captain continued, "it is entirely possible that this is a distraction from a nuclear attack, or that other members of the group will initiate a nuclear attack should we succeed in destroying the enemy ship. I have therefore decided to allow our ship to be sunk. Remember that I hold full authority on this ship. Good-bye.". I stood there for a moment before realising that my Captain had ju
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Max Harmony
Artist | Varied
United States

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:iconcdraccoon:
CDRaccoon Featured By Owner May 1, 2010
Thanks for the Llama ^^
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:iconairshiptango:
airshiptango Featured By Owner Apr 21, 2010  Professional Digital Artist
:llama: Thx :)
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:iconblades123:
blades123 Featured By Owner Apr 21, 2010
thanks for the badge
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:iconduct-tape-cookie:
Duct-Tape-Cookie Featured By Owner Apr 20, 2010  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Nice doing llama business with you.
:dummy:
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:iconui264:
Ui264 Featured By Owner Apr 20, 2010
thx for teh llama xD
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:icontsu-la:
Tsu-la Featured By Owner Apr 20, 2010  Professional Digital Artist
Thank you for the :llama: !
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:iconsysreqpremium:
sysreqpremium Featured By Owner Apr 20, 2010   General Artist
You're welcome, all people who got llamas from me!
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:iconinseperable4ever:
Inseperable4ever Featured By Owner Apr 20, 2010  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you for the Llama badge. :3
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:iconmerides:
Merides Featured By Owner Apr 20, 2010  Hobbyist General Artist
:iconthanksllamaplz:
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:iconnyuuchi:
Nyuuchi Featured By Owner Apr 18, 2010  Student General Artist
Thanks for the llama badge!
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