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sycamoreleaf's avatar

Witd 11: Under the influence

Whispers in the Dark
a Great Mouse Detective fanfiction
Chapter 11 | Under the influence

illustrations.: prologue | 01 | 02 | 03 | 04 | 05 | 06 | 07 | 08 | 09 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 ...
the chapters: prologue | 01 | 02 | 03 | 04 | 05 | 06 | 07 | 08 | 09 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 ... (to be continued)

summary: AU - None believed that the hate-filled words of a little girl could still live on after more then 200 years, but when strange events start occurring in London the city's only hope of survival lies with one mouse ... and a rat?

After such an unacceptably long absence ... WitD is back! Since I won't be wanting to spoiler you about what's happening in this one, I'll just say these:

- it will be impossible not to know where this scene if from once you read it
- the background was fun :3
- it's 100% done digitally - no drafts, no sketches, no noth'
- the chapter was pretty much inspired by the image XD
- and I was to lazy to draw Midget ... but if you'll be leaving me a review I might just make it up to you :3

Und that ... is all for now, for I really must be getting some sleep. Anyway, enjoy! (I've done it all for you!)

artwork and story © Jessica P. (2010)
Basil of Baker Street/The Great Mouse Detective © Eve Titus/Disney
Inspector Vole and Clawes © *Mlle-Relda
please do not use without permission
Image details
Image size
600x445px 278.91 KB
© 2010 - 2022 sycamoreleaf
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ThermidorResistance's avatar
:star::star::star::star-empty: Overall
:star::star::star::star::star-empty: Vision
:star::star::star::star-empty::star-empty: Originality
:star::star::star::star-empty::star-empty: Technique
:star::star::star::star-empty::star-empty: Impact

As far as vision goes, it is a nice header to the story. Purely from an artistic POV, the lighting effects are tight, but the perspective needs work. A lot of work. The image appears too flat, even with the shadows, the characters feel "stuck on" instead of actually "in" the scene. The poses are good, but there needs to be work on the scale of the characters. Ratigan towers over Basil because he is, a rat. Again, this goes back to perspective, and foreshortening. Vole's hand is too small for how close he is to the viewer and in proportion to his head. Even with the shading, it feels rushed. I think some work needs to be done just drawing the characters and getting the feel of how the bowler hat fits on Vole, the way Clawes' hair falls, as well as some studies on how clothing drapes and falls on a person. Basil is drawn nicely, but Ratigan could use some more work in studying his character and how he is designed. Such as breaking him down into basic shape and body frame. Again, anatomy ref maybe useful here.

Wonderful job with coloring, and I really like the overall idea, using the furniture to frame the scene, and the light from the fireplace. It is a very difficult image to pull off successfully.

I think you are on the right track, just slow down and refine your process.

Look at how a fire place is done in the film, look at how they are IRL.
Draw rooms. All sorts of rooms. Get a book on perspective drawing, and study it.
Brinatello's avatar
:star::star::star::star::star: Overall
:star::star::star::star::star: Vision
:star::star::star::star::star: Originality
:star::star::star::star::star: Technique
:star::star::star::star::star: Impact

Vision: Here is a scene of confrontation between good and evil with some hiding onlookers. A rather intriguing view that longs for an explanation to know what is exactly happening. The chapter link is conveniently available for those who are curious. 5.0

Originality: Not the first time the hero argues with the villain with other good guys hiding in the shadows. Since it contains original characters, it's only new with who is present here. 5.0

Technique: Beauty never dies with the artist's love of drawing as professionally as she can. Here, she continues with vivid colors, shadow effects, and that animated feature look again. 5.0

Impact: There's feelings of discomfort and tension on all of the subjects shown here. Both Basil and Ratigan are angry with one another while Clawes, Vole and Thinker are possibly a bit nervous about being caught. It sends a chill to my bones with how Ratigan is glaring at Basil. It's a very convincing look of annoyance on his face. 5.0
MissCassidy's avatar
Awww I like Clawes with glasses! This is a brilliant piece!
sycamoreleaf's avatar
The idea stuck, and it simply wouldn't leave me alone :XD:
So it had to happen eventually :lol:

Thankee! ~:heart:
MissCassidy's avatar
**nods** you're welcome :D
682246's avatar
Great job! I love how you did the shadows!
murr-ma-ing's avatar
Heeheeheeeee Clawes with glasses >3<
sycamoreleaf's avatar
what can I say? I have a thing for guys with spectacles :iconteheplz:
AllyCatAussie's avatar
The chapter isn't showing up! No fair! I want to read!!!!
AllyCatAussie's avatar
Ohhhh eeeeee there it is!

Oh dear, poor Sherry. And darling little Midget.
sycamoreleaf's avatar
FF seems to be temperamental these days I see ...
try this: [link]
AllyCatAussie's avatar
I got rather nervous when Ratigan started sniffing about. My my, it would be awkward and disasterous for Sherry.
sycamoreleaf's avatar
Oh, indeed it would ~ious But then again, what's life without a few risks (and complications, obviously) ;)
AllyCatAussie's avatar
LOL woman-power to Sherry, mate!
LordOfPastries's avatar
uh I should read this shouldn't I.

Y-yeah I'll start now >__>
LordOfPastries's avatar
I really liked it btw, whoa late response LOL. It's a very good fic :3
sycamoreleaf's avatar
:blush: Thank you soo much!
I'm not that much of an author, so any feedback on it is more then just welcome :D
LordOfPastries's avatar
oh tee hee I feel flattered~ keep up the work I won't be dissapointed ^__^
SilverCatseyes's avatar
Mmh... Somehow Basil looks different in this pic, than in the others... Anyway, I like it^^ Clawes looks soooooooooo cute with the glasses ant the hat!!!^^ I just love him!!^^ Now I have to figure out what happens in the next chapter^^ I really LOVE this story and the illustrations... I promise, I will add them to my favorites someday... When I am not to lazy to do that :P ... :D:D Anyway great work :)
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