Shop Forum More Submit  Join Login


we got up this morning
sore and weary
do we have time for fish tacos?

doused with chamomile shampoo
lathered rinsed
out the door with our keys
that opens different doors

maybe i'll just drop you off then
the look of sadness must have been
detectable by blue-grey eyes
are you ok
we can go if you want
to get fish tacos

no no im ok
i said
of course im ok
good bye he dropped me off
and he drove away so slowly
the gears of the car
were still attached to my guts
they could have been full
with fish tacos

june 18, 2001
but you'll be back, right?
Add a Comment:
lustrum Featured By Owner Jul 2, 2001   Writer
that is the sickest concoction of emotion i've ever read; a gruesome tincture. very here, very personal. i think i wrote this in a conversation one time, surely?
heh, ;) (Wink)

Rushing towards singularity.
miss-conception Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2001
i do that all the time..
"i'm ok"

they'll never notice. i don't know if it's unfortunate that i do that, surely i didn't have to, but..oh, "but's"...

sigh..this is sad, i've felt it all before :( (Sad)

opposite the doors we watch
an absent presence
distant are our worlds
drawn near through language
unspoken, heard only if time allows.

sometimes i comfort myself.."it's all temporary" never works. so here i hope i can share this long ache with you..

bracelet rattle
beaded soul settle-
acceptance of a hundred hungered language.

kabookie123 Featured By Owner Jun 20, 2001
I whisper in your ear
"Once heaven began to shake,
and the world stopped to listen.
This haphazzard quake,
drew artists to make,
a grand and eloquent,
An explosive growth,
of deed and art and vision.
And yet upon the heavens,
the gods they moaned and cried.
The roar deafened ear and mind,
to all but carnal distraction.
As man played games,
in the air and the plains,
the gods fell exhausted,
to the floor.
Wanting more, the people gasped,
and twisted and started to plee.
For the only thing left,
for them to do,
was sleep.
And awaken again to the world
without a shaking heaven."
This I whisper in your ear,
and ask,
"Is that sweat on your cheek?
Or a tear?"

great work as always

Riding a Phantom Lullaby
skyOrange Featured By Owner Jun 19, 2001
;( darn.

missing, missing
no, no.
wishing, wishing

and even if
he stayed
he'll still be

locussolus Featured By Owner Jun 18, 2001
anything I write here will be too little. I get the emotion, I think. The guts part is too good.
jsenn Featured By Owner Jun 18, 2001
Oh, Mari, darn, but, shoot, well, geeze, I hate that your morning started like this. He, leaving out that separate door, driving away, attached to you, you craving, craving him, but gosh he drove off so maybe you would be satisfied with fish tacos, and ya didn't get that either, darn. ;) (Wink) (man fish tacos is a hard thing to write much less imagine eating...I am glad it is evening here)
w00master Featured By Owner Jun 18, 2001

Love this poem. Beautifully crafted. There is so much longing, disappointment, and regret! At the same time, I wouldn't say that it was "depressing." The repetition of "fish tacos" was beautifully placed throughout this piece, and the use of the word "detectable" (almost SOUNDING like delectable) I thought was brilliant.

Add a Comment:

:iconsumalangitnawa: More from sumalangitnawa

More from DeviantArt


Submitted on
June 18, 2001
File Size
0 bytes