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More woozle than heffalump.
263 Watchers25.6K Page Views204 Deviations

Uprising

U

Uprising

They move as one in the dark, twenty furry bodies shifting and writhing against each other in a single, perfectly coordinated unit. Their digging claws are wrapped in thick felt, war ribbons, masking their progress as they pour through the abandoned tunnels in perfect silence. Art’k breathes deep and bares his teeth with savage pride. His team has trained well. Their musk is so strong it will be impossible for the enemy to pinpoint their position. As they approach a juncture Art’k flares his scent folds and releases a coded message, a scent so subtle that it may as well have been a drift of sand. His team understands. Main unit, hold position. Skrth’k, scout ahead. Skrth’k detaches himself from the tightly packed ball of writhing bodies and scurries down the leftmost tunnel without hesitation. Their musk is so powerful Art’k doesn’t even smell him leave but he trusts Skrth’k. When this is all over, Skrth’k will mate with his daughters, he will make sure of it. But that is after.

The Riddle

Repairs

R

Repairs

     Heat bakes off of the concrete of the cul-de-sac in undulating waves, a shimmer that distorts the picturesque facades of the homes into half-remembered dreams. Jutting from a ring of withered monkeygrass in this suburbian atoll is a fire hydrant. A shadow slips across the flaking yellow paint. An elderly man in bermuda shorts stands before it, sweat glistening on his shaggy beer gut. His brow furrows as he sizes up his opponent. This was his place, his home and he'd be damned if he was going to let this yellow hunk of metal go unpunished.    He closes his eyes and lifts his arm into the air. His fingertips gently probe the air beside h

A Lime Named Rick

A

A Lime Named Rick

A curious rich little brat fell into a well with a splat where he saw brownish things with some leathery wings. Now this idiot thinks he's a bat! ---------- There once was a man in a cowl who spoke with a gravelly growl. He fought crime with a will. Then he took a pastille and now all of the crooks are his pals. ---------- They say if a man loves to frown and gallivants all over town beating men with his fists though they try to resist then it's risky to dress like a clown.

Version 10

Adult -ery

Mr. Charlie

M

Mr. Charlie

They all say Mr. Charlie is friendly to all but it's mostly to children, the weak and the small. He's a strange looking gent standing six foot eleven with long gnarled fingers, each hand having seven! They are crooked and curved like the roots of a tree and they're perfect for crushing an ill-advised plea. He will slink through the dark of your room late at night and he'll stand just outside to make sure you're alright. If you feel there are those that have done you a wrong then just whisper their name and he'll be right along. He will climb up their houses and in through their windows. He'll snap all their neckbones in violent crescen

Missing Parts

M

Missing Parts

If it's true that life is like a rollercoaster; mine has missing parts.

To the Moon

T

To the Moon

I'll build a ladder to the moon, the tallest ladder ever. I'll build a ladder big and strong that's reinforced with leather. I'll cut the tree down in our yard and chop it up for wood and use the neighbor's fence for rungs to build this ladder good. My friends will all be jealous of my ladder to the moon. I'll have to build it super quick! The sun is rising soon.

Counter-logic

C

Counter-logic

I had the perfect trick to use I knew just what to play. If I could lay down one more card I'd surely win the day. I looked into your gleeful eyes. and at your spiteful grin. I saw you had two islands and I knew I wouldn't win. While we were walking I had found a coin and made to grab it but saw you had two islands so I stopped and let you have it. While we debated I thought up the wittiest retort but saw you had two islands so my argument fell short. I met a girl and knew she was the one, without a doubt but saw you had two islands so I watched you ask her out. But then while we were old and grey and you were unawares I saw you had no i
See all

Uprising

U

Uprising

They move as one in the dark, twenty furry bodies shifting and writhing against each other in a single, perfectly coordinated unit. Their digging claws are wrapped in thick felt, war ribbons, masking their progress as they pour through the abandoned tunnels in perfect silence. Art’k breathes deep and bares his teeth with savage pride. His team has trained well. Their musk is so strong it will be impossible for the enemy to pinpoint their position. As they approach a juncture Art’k flares his scent folds and releases a coded message, a scent so subtle that it may as well have been a drift of sand. His team understands. Main unit, hold position. Skrth’k, scout ahead. Skrth’k detaches himself from the tightly packed ball of writhing bodies and scurries down the leftmost tunnel without hesitation. Their musk is so powerful Art’k doesn’t even smell him leave but he trusts Skrth’k. When this is all over, Skrth’k will mate with his daughters, he will make sure of it. But that is after.

The Riddle

Repairs

R

Repairs

     Heat bakes off of the concrete of the cul-de-sac in undulating waves, a shimmer that distorts the picturesque facades of the homes into half-remembered dreams. Jutting from a ring of withered monkeygrass in this suburbian atoll is a fire hydrant. A shadow slips across the flaking yellow paint. An elderly man in bermuda shorts stands before it, sweat glistening on his shaggy beer gut. His brow furrows as he sizes up his opponent. This was his place, his home and he'd be damned if he was going to let this yellow hunk of metal go unpunished.    He closes his eyes and lifts his arm into the air. His fingertips gently probe the air beside h

A Lime Named Rick

A

A Lime Named Rick

A curious rich little brat fell into a well with a splat where he saw brownish things with some leathery wings. Now this idiot thinks he's a bat! ---------- There once was a man in a cowl who spoke with a gravelly growl. He fought crime with a will. Then he took a pastille and now all of the crooks are his pals. ---------- They say if a man loves to frown and gallivants all over town beating men with his fists though they try to resist then it's risky to dress like a clown.

Version 10

Adult -ery

Mr. Charlie

M

Mr. Charlie

They all say Mr. Charlie is friendly to all but it's mostly to children, the weak and the small. He's a strange looking gent standing six foot eleven with long gnarled fingers, each hand having seven! They are crooked and curved like the roots of a tree and they're perfect for crushing an ill-advised plea. He will slink through the dark of your room late at night and he'll stand just outside to make sure you're alright. If you feel there are those that have done you a wrong then just whisper their name and he'll be right along. He will climb up their houses and in through their windows. He'll snap all their neckbones in violent crescen

Victim of Circumstance

V

Victim of Circumstance

The auto-teller chimes at you and spits out several bills. You glance around and see nearby a man that gives you chills. He's filthy and bedraggled, plus you're certain that he smells. He looks at you and smiles wide. The fear inside you swells. You snatch the cash and walk away uneasy with his kind. But after several hasty steps you hear him close behind. Your pulse increases with your pace. You know the number - call it. You feel a hand upon your shoulder. "Hey! You left your wallet."

Run, Rabbit, Run

R

Run, Rabbit, Run

Breathe little rabbit. Breathe Breathe little rabbit. 'Cause another baby's comin' and he's not the only one. Drink little rabbit. Drink Drink little rabbit.'Cause you gotta get your fill but then your mama's gotta run. Hide little rabbit. Hide Hide little rabbit. 'Cause the farmer is a comin' and the farmer's got a gun. Run little rabbit Run Run little rabbit 'Cause you gotta keep on runnin' til your runnin' days are done.

This Guy

T

This Guy

I have a friend a special guy I think you know the one. He uses all the dishes but won't clean them when he's done. He's an able architect. He builds things in a flash. I just wish these structures weren't all made out of trash. Don't get me wrong. He's not a slob. He's clean as he can be. That's why the washer and the dryer are always full you see. Sometimes, I think while I am gone he smuggles in a bear. How else, I wonder did our shower fill with so much hair? When he takes his shoes off I have to pinch my nose and ignore the grove of mushrooms that he grows between his toes. It's all these things that make him such a very special fri

Bears and Wolves and Lions

B

Bears and Wolves and Lions

Mother said Look for the child in everyone And you will know them better And you will love them better. I had you and them I knew you and them Why should I look? Why should I search? And then I left I hunted dreams I swallowed starlight, inhaled the sun I walked with bears and wolves and lions And feared them And feared to know them Because I had you and them Because I knew you and them. Until I looked ahead for just a breath And when I turned You were gone and they were gone There was only me Weeping starlight, breathing sunfire Among bears and wolves and lions. And Mother said Look for the child in everyone And you will know them better

Spotlight

The Inebriate Guild of Pistachio Juggernauts

T

The Inebriate Guild of Pistachio Juggernauts

I will tell you a story as best as I can   but I warn you it's mostly untrue   and what parts of it are, I am sorry to say   have a meaning that's lost upon you.   Now the story begins, much as they often do   in a once, an upon, and a time   and the words I must say, with a heartfelt regret   for the most part incessantly rhyme. It all starts in the west in a desert most vast   in a teapot of massive proportion,     one whose walls were decrepit and falling apart   and afflicted by quite vicious torsion.   And inside this strange hovel of tea-stained decor   lived a warlock so cunning and foul   even demons who lurk in those worrisome waste
18Comments
Artist // Hobbyist // Literature
  • May 12, 1988
  • United States
  • Deviant for 10 years
  • He / Him
My Bio
Hi! I'm Josh. I'm a man who loves to read (got a couple thousand books under my belt and I'm always lookin' for more) and write, though I often frustrate myself at my inability to finish anything prose related. I primarily write poetry of the rhyming sort and, while a good deal of it is very silly, I can't help but inject a little darkness into some of it. So if that's your cup of tea then pay my gallery a visit.

I'm not the most active artist in the world but I'm always willing to help, critique (with what knowledge I possess), or just generally be a person to talk to. Don't be afraid to message me about anything!

Favourite Books
ALL OF THEM!!!
Favourite Writers
Way too many...
Favourite Games
Tabletop
Favourite Gaming Platform
A Table
Tools of the Trade
My incredible sense of nonsense

Comments 826

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YouInventedMeHobbyist Writer
Happy Birthday! :cake:
SubjugatedSandwichHobbyist Writer

Much thanks for the birthday wishes! :D

xlntwtch Writer
:iconhappybirthdaysignplz: ... :iconcakeplz:... :party:
SubjugatedSandwichHobbyist Writer

Awww. Much thanks!

Thanks for the fave!
SubjugatedSandwichHobbyist Writer
You're welcome! Thank you for the awesome writing. =D
satellitenotesHobbyist Writer

Thank you for your fav on Worm :pumpkin: