You can find some interesting things on the Internet, lurking amongst the slightly terrifying porn, ghastly Flash ads and misspelt hatemongering: an occasional gem, shining all the brighter for all the slag they're encrusted in. What can be still more interesting, however, is when your package actually arrives, as it had now done for our protagonist...
Brian stood before the giant pet carrier, which was easily big enough to hold a Hummer. His arms were folded, the left hand holding a dog collar and an invoice, the right drumming an irritated tattoo on his arm.
"For the last time, come out of there!"
From the pet carrier came a thick wisp of smoke, and a wily glint like greasy gold.
"Why ssshhhould I?"
"Because I paid good money for you, you're mine."
"Money poorly ssspent, it ssseemsss," came a replying hiss. "I am no-one'sss to give, or to own."
Brian shut his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose.
"I ordered a pet, not a big box of sarcasm."
The contents of the carrier gave no repl