Starlene's avatar
Musicals and stuff.
464 Watchers99.7K Page Views649 Deviations
Artist // Hobbyist // Varied
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Super Albino: Llamas are awesome! (172)
birthdAy '10: decade of deviousness
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I've seen it: It's Coming -- Stay Tuned!
My Bio
Siiri. 22 years old. Finnish. Passionate musical theatre fan.

Also likes drawing pictures.

Favourite Movies
Titanic
Favourite TV Shows
Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Favourite Bands / Musical Artists
musical cast recordings, Voltaire
Favourite Books
Don Rosa: The Life and Times of Scrooge McDuck
Tools of the Trade
mechanical pencil, watercolours, Photoshop CS6
Other Interests
writing about all things musical-related in my blog

Statistics

Page Views99.7K
Deviations649
Watchers464
Watching115
Favourites773
Comments Made24.1K
Comments Received1.3K

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464 Deviants

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115 Deviants

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4 Groups

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Comments

No problem! :)
Exactly my problem with the star system... Hard to give fanart originality points, and for things like technique... everyone does things their own way, so what is the example that should be considered worthy of five stars? No idea.
Your chains are still mine
:star::star::star::star-half::star-empty: Overall
:star::star::star::star::star-empty: Vision
:star::star::star::star-empty::star-empty: Originality
:star::star::star::star::star-empty: Technique
:star::star::star::star-half::star-empty: Impact

Okay, I don't often write dART critique (I dislike the star system), but let's try...

First of all, that detail!! The Red Death is The Phantom's most amazing costume by far, and you did it beautiful justice - he totally outshines the beautiful lady next to him, haha!
I think the composition is very nice and intimate, I like that they're so close to each other and how worried/frightened Christine seems.

I think there are slight problems with how the Phantom's hand and the chains he's holding look like. The chains seem to defy gravity a bit or something, they just look a bit unnatural, and I also think the fist could look more 3D - maybe check how you'd really hold a necklace like that.

I really like how you give the characters a slight white outline - but I think, because of that, the background could have a stronger or a darker colour.

Overall, I think this is a beautiful piece of Phantom fanart!
Your chains are still mine
:star::star::star::star: Overall
:star::star::star::star::star-half: Vision
:star::star::star::star-half::star-empty: Originality
:star::star::star::star::star-empty: Technique
:star::star::star::star::star-half: Impact

I like the idea of this piece.
I would've given even more originality stars if I didn't know that half the school is doing these things in the art class. But of course everybody has a different picture and a different story going on in theirs. And I like your story.
It takes a moment to figure out what's going on and even after that I'm not completely sure what happens. Is she afraid in the last picture, feeling that the man is taking away her freedom or maybe abusing her? Or is she crying with relief because her loved one didn't let go of her? Good thing you didn't show us his face, it would've told too much.
Without the photo of the hands I'd almost believe the first interpretation, but that shot seems gentle and loving to me. I'm sure you know what's going on, but if you want this thing to be more interesting for the watcher, don't let us know!

I like how you've used contemporary, somewhat undetailed clothing and hair for the characters. Even though the story could've happened in any time of history I think it's nice you went with the simple. It would've been distracting viewers from the story if you'd used some rococo or Edwardian clothing or too much details.

You've handled the pencil very nicely here. The shading is beautiful. The white lines around the characters in the first picture ft the picture perfectly and make the characters stand out of the darkness, so make sure to use that in the last panel, too.

The anatomy seems mostly correct. There's still a little something I'd like to point out:
The first picture with her face bothers me a bit. I think it would've worked a bit better if they eyes looked more realistic. And you should be able to see some flesh behind her left eye when looking a face in that angle, but here the eyeball meets the background weirdly.
I'm also not sure if her ear is in the right place or a bit too high in the last panel. Think about it while you still can change it.

I think that this drawing could work even better without those faint straight lines around your pictures. But it would've required a lightbox to make the panels look neat without drawing the lines, and I understand it's hard getting to use a lightbox in school's art class.

Now, with all that said I'd like to point out that these are very little things, actually. They don't ruin the whole picture in any way, most of the people probably won't even notice them.

I bet the last picture will look great when finished, too.
So, let the teacher know that I'm really upset if she doesn't give you a great grade on this.
School project WIP