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About Literature / Hobbyist Phoenix HansbargerMale/United States Recent Activity
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I know I've asked for this a lot about me getting a comment on my writing. I keep doing that because some of my writing are just completely ignored. I'm sorry for asking but I do need the feedback so I can really improve. I went with all my writing that has at most ten comments.

Broken AngelI’m not sure when I first realized I was broken or different. Maybe it was when the voices in my head started talking to me more than usual. Or maybe when I started to realize my feelings for my best friend, Annie, was much more than a friend. Either way, it wasn’t normal. At least for my family. I once talked to my mom about my feelings for Annie and the voices and that’s the worst mistake I’ve ever made. She thought I was possessed by the devil and that it was wrong to have feelings for Annie. She forced me to get help or she would kick me out. I did get “help”. The help was me being forced to talk to our Preacher. I made him believe that he had “fixed” me. I’ve kept quiet about these secrets ever since. Annie doesn't know about any of these problems and she never will. If she ever finds out I’ll be killed. I think at least.
-Angel
“Angel” I heard my mom call for me as I put my diary away. She open


Meow    The room is silent as I look for my pencil sharpener. No one’s home, it’s just me and the pets. Dad’s at a friend’s house, mom’s at work, and Chris is at a friend’s house as well. I love these nights, the nights where I can get the house to myself for awhile.
    Anyway, I found my pencil sharpener. I sit on my bed as I get lost in my thoughts once again. It’s been taken apart like it has been for awhile. it hasn’t been used in roughly a month though. Hard to believe I’ve been clean for a month from self-harm. I shouldn’t relapse, people would be upset if I did. Maybe I’ll be able to hide it better this time.
    I glance at my arms. They’re pale and the scars aren’t showing anymore. They faded away so quickly. I didn’t cut very deep last time. Only deep enough for it to bleed for a minute. I miss seeing the blood but I can’t get addicted



BrokenTold I was broken today
Don't know why
Maybe because of the cuts
On my arm
Or my depression
How am I broken
From these things
How would you fix me
If I'm broken
Or maybe I'm
Unable to be fix
What will you then
How can you fix something
That will forever stay
Broken


Will It Help
Alone again
Just for a little bit
But enough time
To make more scars
You told not to
Told to stop
By family
Friends
Even the counselor
Told to write
Instead of cutting
Told to draw
Instead of cutting
Will it work though
Will it stop the pain
Will it help


Until I StopIt's almost been two years
Since I started this destruction
Two years worth of scars
Upon my arms
So many blades
I've gone through
How much longer
Will this keep up
Until I die by suicide
Or something else?
How much longer 
Until I get help
How much longer
Until I stop



Butterfly    I was born in black ink. I was just some drawing that I thought had no meaning. I would soon realize that I was going to be the most important drawing you ever drew. When you first drew me I noticed something, your arm that I was on was covered in red lines, the lines of someone who self-harmed. At that moment I realized what I was, I was a way to quit cutting. At that moment I knew my goal, to stop you from self-harming.
   You gave me a name. You called me Angel, after the girl you liked. She didn’t know this, she just knew you self-harmed. When I started to fade, I was afraid you would start self-harming again, but I was wrong. You redrew me and every time you did you whispered “I can’t lose you. I need to stop forever.” Forever I would stay.
   I watched you so through so many times where you probably would’ve self-harmed but you didn’t, because I was there. I watched you hold the razor blade in your hand, debatin


SharpieI use Sharpies a lot
To draw on my skin
And my friends hate me for it
Even though it makes
A pretty picture
In one color
There's a twist with
This one color
The color is blood
And the Sharpie's a razor blade



Save MeI'm so far in
This depression
That I can't take
Much more
I'm asking myself
If it's to late to
Save me
The thoughts are getting darker
And meaner
Getting me closer 
To ending my life
Someone save me
I might just end it all tonight
Finally make me happy
Once in for all
But I don't want to leave
Not yet
I want to live longer
And be happy
But I can't
So please, before I end it
Save me


Completely HappyThe stars are shining bright
This clear night
It's a beautiful night
To end my life
I know how now
After trying to decide
For so long
How to end my life
But first I must make sure
I have a couple of things
A letter to mom and dad
And my razor blade
I put the letter
To my side
And roll up my sleeves
My arms reveal
My history of pain
Through cuts
That travel up my arms
I grab my razor blade
And the final cut
Putting the cut over
All the others
I finally end my life
Completely happy


Clock Will Stay TickingThe clock is ticking

Counting til my end
Who knows when it ends
Not even I know when it ends
But I will be able to stop the clock
If I end my life
That thought is floating 
Around in my mind
Bringing me closer everyday
To completing that thought
I try so hard to ignore



Do I Regret?Scars running up and down my arms and legs
Carefully hidden so no one can see
They hide feelings I can't release
Feeling I don't let anyone see
I let thoughts that no one knows 
Into those cuts
Thoughts that are dark and violent
Staring at these cuts
I ask myself one question
Do I regret cutting?
The answer?
Yes, I do regret


Open Your EyesSmiling face 
Just a lie
Open your eyes
Can't see the blood
Showing though clothes
Open your eyes
Can't see the face
That just wants to die
Open your eyes
Depression fake
Just for attention
Open your eyes
There's a world
You never see
Open your eyes
There's pain out there
You need to see
Open your eyes
You could save lives
If you just
Open your eyes



Meet AnorexiaLook at the smiling girl in front of you
She looks healthy right
She isn’t though. because of who?
Whoever it is it has taken her light
It’s made her skinny
By taking away her fat
Has made her mini
And has made her look like a bat
People wonder and ask questions
Asking “How did this happen”
They give her suggestions
But they can’t help their poor maiden
They learn who took her light and life
Meet Anorexia who gave you grief

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StarFall24
Phoenix Hansbarger
Artist | Hobbyist | Literature
United States
That's Ki Ki, my favorite cat
I'm Phoenix and I love to draw. I've been drawing since I was little but I'm not very good at drawing.
I'm also a writer. I love to write and I have very creative ideas. I love to write poems and I'm pretty good at writing them. I have a fanfiction, fictionpress, and a wattpad account.
Fanfiction username: cats12812
Fictionpress username: AnonymousHeartOfPoems34
Wattpad username: HeartOfPoems34
Interests

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:iconserrara:
Serrara Featured By Owner Nov 28, 2018  Hobbyist Writer
hi
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DAKIVIX Featured By Owner May 5, 2018
Yay! Happy birthdayy!!! Wuff wuff!!
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xLunarSurgex Featured By Owner May 4, 2018  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Happy Birthday.

:iconpinkiepiecakeplz: :cake: :iconcakeplz: :iconcake3dplz:
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Unreal-Forever Featured By Owner May 5, 2017  Hobbyist Digital Artist
:iconbirthd::iconbir2::iconbir3::iconbir4:
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Hope you have a wonderful day :icondragonmusicplz::icondragoncakeplz:
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Runshin Featured By Owner Oct 3, 2016  Professional Digital Artist
150816 - Thank You-2 by Runshin  
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