Alright, it's sure been a while, so I'm just gonna give updates about what's going on here, for anyone who wants to know.
The last several months I've put my energy mostly into finding work, in vain which is more like killing than kicking. I'm still unemployed, but I did get myself back on track halfway again.
Last week I had an intake interview for a couple of tests that would test my intelligence and personality. Of course I already knew most of the results, but now I have them on official paper which can help me with finding a job. The intelligence test was a little surprising, though, I scored higher than I expected. Not with numbers, though, the scores for that and math was really low..
Anyway, the woman that interviewed me was extremely nice and the tests were actually meant to help me get back into school. But at the end of the interview she concluded that school just isn't my path. Which is something I already knew, but to have an actual professional telling me this, it was really special...
She asked me what I wanted to do and become in the future and I listed the things I always do: musician, writer, painter, illustrator and maybe something with clothing or merchandise. When she asked me what activities I do within those fields I told her that I'm writing music and that I wanna record a demo, and record a cd before the end of 2010. Next to that I'm writing a book, next to some spiritual prose, and that I'm illustrating a children's book as an amateur. And that it was hard for me to find school for that field because for neither of those things do I believe I need an actual education.
When she asked me why exactly I wanted to go back to school, I - after listing out all those things - simply couldn't answer it. I didn't know why! Probably for a paperwork, I said. But she urged to me that going to school for other people instead of myself isn't a very wise decision. I totally agreed and then I suddenly found my way again, I was back to my original plan. She did well me to keep up the spirit and follow short courses and just make my activities my own education. I need to keep planning, need to be consequent and concreet and keep my head above the surface.
Right now I have a serious energy and inspiration problem. When I lay this down before her today - when we discussed the test results - she told me this is a very normal thing for someone who's unemployed. It was quite a relief to hear that. Her advice to me was to find a part time job, not with money - but with energy and inspiration as the main reason. That actually got me more motivated.
So, my plans:
Get a new guitar (semi-accoustic), get recording equipment and make a demo. And a cd before the end of 2010, whether it's officially published or just released on the internet, either one is alright. Getting a new guitar can take a while though, so until then its practice practice practice!
Write a manuscript for my book and spread it to publishers for information and advice. Then keep going with the book and find a good publisher to bring it to life. If all goes well, then it's on to the next one.
Finish illustrating that children's book and see what the results are, silently hoping for some popularity and people to approach me after it. But only if I deserve it of course.
Get money to refill my paint supply... And get artisic!
Also helping out my brother a bit with his gameshop, with which he's truly going through this time. I told him I cannot be his partner, because now I've got my own activities. But I can go with him to conventions and markets as his assistent, as I will this sunday to a retro game fair.
Find work! Which is honestly my biggest problem, because I'm somehow quite picky, which is not exactly handy when you're in need... I'm trying to let that pickiness go, but it's not as easy as I thought. Nevertheless, work!
Finally get somebody to lend me a psp and crisis core, because I have GOT to play that one!
Also, it's my birthday next month and we're gonna have a kickass party. I feel up for it very much!
Next week two beltaine celebrations!
One with my family here, and one with my friends in the weekend.
Well I guess that's it. It becomes you all well, luv ya!