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Being a Supportive Friend by Spottedfire-cat Being a Supportive Friend by Spottedfire-cat
Sometimes it's rough when you have or ARE a friend that has some sort of issue, or fear, or even condition. Being on the supportive side of it can be a bit difficult too; like how do you help without harming anyone?

I quickly made this because this is something extremely relevant to me (as i'm always on both sides or the thing), and I thought it might help some peeps who are having troubles finding a way to support their friends. Trying not to tell peeps how to handle their friendships or anything, and each situation and person is different, so yeah. e3e

And as a final and very important word, if someone says their being bothered by the situation or discussion, don't go "But we're talking because we care!" because that is actually manipulative mind poop. If what you're currently doing is only stressing the person out, stop. Good intent or not, what you're doing is harmful and you're doing the exact opposite of what you want to do. Take a step back and think things out; you'll get it eventually~
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:iconlegoninjagogirl:
legoninjagogirl Featured By Owner Sep 14, 2014  Student General Artist
aww it's so adorable and helpful about friends
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:iconwaterpaw11:
waterpaw11 Featured By Owner Jul 28, 2014
Thanks for the advice spotty! :) it's helped me a lot.
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:iconjayfox31:
JayFox31 Featured By Owner Jun 28, 2014  Hobbyist Artist
it's so hard to get good friends who will abide by that. =o
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:iconpunqq:
punqq Featured By Owner Edited Jul 11, 2014  Student Digital Artist
ikr
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:iconjayfox31:
JayFox31 Featured By Owner Jul 11, 2014  Hobbyist Artist
Yus
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:iconpunqq:
punqq Featured By Owner Jul 11, 2014  Student Digital Artist
i shall quote one of the truest quotes ever
"they act like they love you, they act like they'll be there forever, and then one day that pack it all up and take their love with them!"
~mittens
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:iconjayfox31:
JayFox31 Featured By Owner Jul 11, 2014  Hobbyist Artist
Huh... So true. I've been on both sides of the story. But I leave people because theirs a problem.
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:iconpunqq:
punqq Featured By Owner Jul 11, 2014  Student Digital Artist
i have had some of my closest friends attack me, then act like we're still friends
it hurts, ya know
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:iconjayfox31:
JayFox31 Featured By Owner Jul 11, 2014  Hobbyist Artist
OMG, one of my ex's is just the worst about that.

she ignores me, puts me down, makes fun of me, won't play games with me anymore, and kinda just treats me crappy. And I practicaly walk on egg shells for her cus I liked her. And then she finds one thing to be a bitch about and basicaly tells me to fuck of and die.
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:icontalonstar-swiftclan:
Talonstar-SwiftClan Featured By Owner May 17, 2014
I love this so much, and I wish people would just be like this with me.
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:iconlithiarose:
LithiaRose Featured By Owner May 12, 2014
This is cute and nice, like it
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:iconcoolkhgirl:
CoolKHgirl Featured By Owner May 2, 2014  Hobbyist Filmographer
i can understand,
i usually confort  my friend who has some emotionally promblem, she ususlly tell me or if i see somethings up i ask her
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:iconnekomyuki:
NekoMyuki Featured By Owner Apr 15, 2014
Great little explanation :3 
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:iconalicornluna123:
AlicornLuna123 Featured By Owner Apr 7, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Spottedfire? YAY I FINALLY FOUND YOU ON DEVIANTART! I LOVE YOUR VIDS SO MUCH!
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:iconimmaemmakitteh:
ImmaEmmaKitteh Featured By Owner Apr 6, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
You go Spotty!
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:iconfrozenvolf:
Frozenvolf Featured By Owner Apr 4, 2014  Professional Writer
THank you for the wonderful information Spotty. :) This will help me as much as possible. ^^
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:icongirlykitten:
girlykitten Featured By Owner Apr 2, 2014
what about if my friend is cutting, and i can't get to them or contact someone who can get them help?
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:iconspottedfire-cat:
Spottedfire-cat Featured By Owner Apr 2, 2014  Professional Digital Artist
That is a tricky situation because there is self harm involved. Since cutting usually boils down to severe depression, you really just have to be there and be that friend that's always there when they're sad. There are even alternatives to cutting if the behavior is addictive, and ones that are much safer in fact. If you really think something bad is about to go down you really must either contact their family or the authorities.

My advice is not to pound into them that they should stop, since sometimes peeps get that burst of stubbornness when they get told what to do when it's something they have strong feelings about. Instead, maybe help them find something that will make them not want to harm themselves and end it all, something to go on to the next day for. Again, this IS a tricky situation, and since you know the actual situation better than I you can probably think of a better, more personalized approach, and if you have really REALLY serious concerns you need to tell someone about it. If you know the address then that's all you need to call the authorities. There are also many Suicide Prevention things online, and I would really give them a look.

Otherwise, just be a caring friend that's there to listen to their darkest thoughts, and when you can let yourself be available when they're having those thoughts at the loneliest part of the night. I really hope that helps.
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:icongirlykitten:
girlykitten Featured By Owner Apr 2, 2014
thanks. one more thing, i rarely get to see my cousin anymore, and the last time i saw her, i found out she was being abused by her mother. (the family already knows, but my cousin and her parents dissapeard and have not been in contact since i last saw her. :( )
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:iconkittycatr0x:
kittycatr0x Featured By Owner Apr 3, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Abuse is a very serious thing and can be harmful to her now AND in the future. Talk to your parents about it, and if they won't do anything and you're afraid for her safety, you should probably contact the police. Even if it isn't an everyday occurrence, it's still serious and could affect her seriously. It's probably a good idea to look at other resources too, though. Here's some links to help:

www.community.nsw.gov.au/docs_…

psychcentral.com/ask-the-thera…

If those don't help, google is your friend.
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:icongirlykitten:
girlykitten Featured By Owner Apr 3, 2014
thank you very much.
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:iconczmavery:
czmAvery Featured By Owner Apr 2, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Awwwww ... <3
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:iconartisticbunny6:
Artisticbunny6 Featured By Owner Apr 2, 2014  Student General Artist
totally agree
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:iconlilysplash:
Lilysplash Featured By Owner Apr 2, 2014
Adorable~! >w<
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:iconcreamykittens:
CreamyKittens Featured By Owner Apr 2, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
this is a really good tip thank you :D
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:iconcatslow:
catslow Featured By Owner Apr 2, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
this is so true and cute it hurts >7< :heart:
I usually try to help my closest friends this way. There are times that people don't understand this so the ask and ask about the issue, what obiously is uncomfortable for them, so I tell them to stop or puch that people away. Once some people told me that I was being selfish and that I only wanted my friends for my own :/
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:iconkatiekat842:
KatieKat842 Featured By Owner Apr 2, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
this makes me think of my super amazing friends omg
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:iconflashkat7:
FlashKat7 Featured By Owner Apr 2, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
yay
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:iconyo-featherstar:
Yo-FeatherStar Featured By Owner Apr 2, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
wow its awesome!!!!!
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:iconneonliights:
neonliights Featured By Owner Apr 2, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Thanks for making this, Spotty! Very useful tips. I'm often on both sides.
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:iconlyragoldenwarriorcat:
LyraGoldenWarriorCat Featured By Owner Apr 2, 2014  Student Traditional Artist
Thanks so much for posting this! An issue came up just last weekend, and I've been seriously worried about what to do for a while, but this helps a lot. Thanks again!
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:icondarcblakwolf:
DarcblakWolf Featured By Owner Apr 2, 2014
Absolutely true. Even just letting someone know you will be there for them can make a world of difference to them.
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:iconsnoeflayk:
Snoeflayk Featured By Owner Apr 2, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Good tips. :-)
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:icondesireewolfe001:
DesireeWolfe001 Featured By Owner Apr 2, 2014  Student Digital Artist
Me and friends can be so emo sometimes we can't go a freaking month without being bothered by something, and whats bad is my other friends have it a lot worse than me and they cut themselves and stuff. This might help, thank you~ >w<
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:iconartistic-optimist:
artistic-optimist Featured By Owner Apr 2, 2014  Student Filmographer
ouo Thanks for making this. I have a bunch of friends who need help, but I'm not always sure what to do even when I want to help fix the problem. Sometimes mentioning it makes thw problem worse, so this seems like the best solution.
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:iconsketchthekat14:
sketchthekat14 Featured By Owner Apr 2, 2014  Student Digital Artist
Ahh now I understand, thanks Spotty!! >w<
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:iconnephose:
Nephose Featured By Owner Apr 2, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Very cute! Also helpful!
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:iconshiveringrose:
ShiveringRose Featured By Owner Apr 2, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I needed this ;.;

Thanks, Spotty. You made my day
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:iconjcat4ever2:
Jcat4ever2 Featured By Owner Apr 2, 2014  Student Digital Artist
Cute and thoughtful! I love it. :)
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:iconnarsoghistdefinition:
narsoghistDefinition Featured By Owner Apr 2, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Aah, this is a really nice idea! But I'm having trouble understanding part of the "there's only that one friend who has issues we have, have heard about, or are." Line. Or are?? I'm really confused? Probably just me being stupid. That aside, everything's pretty accurate and lovely. >w<
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:iconspottedfire-cat:
Spottedfire-cat Featured By Owner Apr 2, 2014  Professional Digital Artist
You found the error thing. It's supposed to be something along the lines of "we all have friends that have an issue" and such, but I was tired and wrote it all funny. Gonna fix it right away. ewe;;
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:iconnarsoghistdefinition:
narsoghistDefinition Featured By Owner Apr 2, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
The things lack of sleep will do.
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:iconlilysplash:
Lilysplash Featured By Owner Apr 2, 2014
Ah~! Font is still too small! But looking forward to fixed bugs because the mini pictures are still so cute!
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:iconkimeters:
Kimeters Featured By Owner Apr 2, 2014  Student Digital Artist
There are some issues with conveyance on this. o:
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:iconspottedfire-cat:
Spottedfire-cat Featured By Owner Apr 2, 2014  Professional Digital Artist
Yeah, but I can't pin them out at the moment because tiredness and it's late kfjhsdfk

I still have the file so once I figure it out I can fix it. >w<;;
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:iconkimeters:
Kimeters Featured By Owner Apr 2, 2014  Student Digital Artist
you ready to get 12 extra comments on it?
get hyped
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:iconzapp1n:
ZAPP1N Featured By Owner Apr 2, 2014  Student Digital Artist
First coment XD
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:iconzapp1n:
ZAPP1N Featured By Owner Apr 2, 2014  Student Digital Artist
Ahh ok :3
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