I think the idea of people marrying before 18 makes me a little uncomfortable. There's simply no way you could have been seriously dating someone for long enough to really know them while still getting married at 16 or 17.
I mean, I am 17 right now and I'm dating, and I'm hoping to make it last... but really, I recognize that I'm not ready for marriage. I'm fine with waiting - I think that extra time will help to prove to myself and other people that I and my boyfriend are actually serious about the relationship - and plus, that seems like what we will have to do anyway. We live over a thousand miles apart, not to mention I am going to college. Meanwhile, he is still in high school. There's just no way that would work economically, physically, and etc.
That said, though, I've managed to date him for nearly a year now despite the fact that we live so far apart, so I think we are doing better than most people our age. I've already kind of decided that I will marry him if we are still together after college. I'll (hopefully) be 25 and have a PhD by then, so I see no reason why I wouldn't be able to make a decision then. 25 is more than mature enough, and I should be more than able to get a good job.
But anyway, no, I don't think it should be under 18. Maybe in times past it made sense but I just don't think it fits in our current social structure. It's difficult enough to support yourself just being a single teenager with a high school diploma, let alone a married one. The thought of scrapping college to move down and marry someone and hoping to support myself with just a high school education sounds like a really bad decision to me.
EDIT: Also read through the comments, and saw some really good points. Someone said that if a <18 couple was confident of their relationship lasting and thought they were meant to be together, they wouldn't have a problem with waiting. And I completely agree with that. As I said, I feel pretty confident in my own relationship lasting, but I'm not exactly jumping in line to get married right away. I've got time. I don't see us breaking up before I turn 18 anyway. Something really drastic would have to happen for that to occur. But that's my opinion. I simply wouldn't consider marrying someone if I was that worried about them breaking up with me in the next couple months.
I'm split between this one. Girls as young as 12 are having babies in third-world countries and raising them. Hell, even in our own country not too long ago girls could marry after 15, it varies by state law but that's how it is.
on the other hand, marriage is nothing but a contract. That's the way it has always been, and still is. There's no reason for them NOT to wait. Until very recently, love had nothing at all to do with it. Marriage was merging two houses together. Two families. (or more, if you live in Utah lol). The modern concept of love and marriage is just that… modern.
I'm all for waiting, myself. Just playing Devil's Advocate for a minute with the last response. There's no reason not to wait. Having been one myself, kids don't know what love really is. Boys think with the wrong head. A lot of them still do. Even me sometimes
The idea that you have to get married to be seriously together is crap. When you break it down, all marriage is is a huge celebration, a big promise and paperwork. I feel like if they truly want to spend the rest of their lives together, they can totally wait until they're at least 18. Besides, people at that 15-17 age tend to be a little immature about relationships, solely because they haven't really had too much experience with 1. really serious relationships and 2. the idea of spending the rest of your life with someone because it is most definitely not what they think it is. As much as I'm cringing at the idea of generalizing that group of people and tying them down to the teenager stereotype, I feel like this point's one that needs to be pointed out anyhow. That's a little bit of a worse, more lacking argument on the subject, but I still stand by what I believe. ovo
Exactly! There's no reason not to be able to wait. Yep, same. And even if there are exceptions... I don't feel like we should make those exceptions the rule, if the rule is something the majority cannot handle properly.
How could they financial support themselves I don't even know. I'm turning 19 and my boyfriend 20 and neither of us has a job yet, he's in college and I'm unable to attend school or get a job because of my anxiety and depression. I can't rely on him to be the only one to support us in the future now can I? So that means I have to find ways to work around my anxiety to make an income. That will take time. Now I know plenty of people have jobs starting as early as 16 but you still have to think, is that a job you want for the rest of your life? Can you support a family with it? Probably not. If you truly love your partner and are responsible enough to consider marriage you should wait until you are in a secure position. Now that said I have nothing against someone who is younger getting engaged to their partner. And engagement can be drawn out for years and if they want to power to them, just wait on the ceremony kiddies.
I think that if a couple under 18 are devoted to each other and were truly meant to be together, they will remain dating until they are older. If you fear your partner will leave you before then, it most likely isn't worth it, because they'll break up even in a marriage.
Yeah. There was this huge thing in Australia a few years back where a 15 year old didn't want to die a virgin so his friends hired a prostitute(they made sure everything was safe ect.) for him. He died happy but lots of people were pissed off.
ZombieRaccoon5Featured By OwnerJul 14, 2014Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Depends on the people. If they're both responsible, and mature then yes, because they're "serious" If they're a bunch of "swag swag alchohol and drugs yolo" then it might be a mistake, but then they just get married after 18, so it really dosn't matter.
Well, but you can't really decide who is "serious" and not serious from the outside. It's either everyone or no one, I don't think a system where "they can if they're serious" would work. Besides, I don't think you should make the exception the law - I don't see why they just couldn't wait?
While I'm all four freedom and rights and stuff, I don't really think this would be a smart idea. I hate to say that kids shouldn't be given too much freedom, but this is one restriction that might be good. I think dating is fine for minors, but marriage should wait until after one becomes a legal adult.
No, I don't. Seventeen, yeah sure. MAYBE sixteen, but anyone under that age are almost definitely not mature enough to make that huge of a decision. Even people who marry at eighteen don't usually have a good marriage, so fifteen, sixteen, or younger is definitely out of the question in my book.
No, they should not be MARRIED until they have a career set out for them and have a degree in college and all that shit. But getting engaged is fine! It's not that I doubt teenagers can understand their love for eachother, but if they get married young and have babies before they get a working job, them and their child's life would be screwed. Only the father would be able to get a working job and the mother would have to stay home and take care of the child, thus making her drop out of schooling/college/her job/pretty much everything.
However, that assumes that they are in a heterosexual relationship. Even with a homosexual relationship, though, getting a home together costs a LOT of money and getting married costs a LOT of money, which would make it more difficult to pay for college.