Resurrection 'F' Redux (Digest Version)

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On one of MasakoX's What If Roundtable streams, I asked “What if Frieza was reincarnated as a human?”  His answer was that he'd be Mr. Azeirf, the zookeeper who hates monkeys.  Good for a chuckle, but I had something specific in mind:

The basic premise is that when Cyborg Frieza came to Earth and got killed by Future Trunks, he was now subject to the cycle of Earth’s afterlife.  (There’s been some vague mention in the series that maybe each planet has its own division of Other World.  This is at odds with an earlier assertion from King Yemma that he judged everybody, but this is hardly the first retcon.  Bureaucracy will be bureaucracy.)  So since Frieza in this timeline has committed no sins on Earth, he didn’t go to Hell and was processed for reincarnation instead.

For starters, why assume that Frieza would be a human male?  We use masculine pronouns for the few examples of Frieza’s race we’ve seen, but we’ve also seen no females and they’re all clearly designed to be androgynous, so it’s a 50/50 possibility that Frieza could reincarnate as a human female, right?

After it was brought back to Masako's attention courtesy of Gussygus28 and RedDragonForce2, the question “What if Azeirf was the daughter of [X & Y]?” became a running joke on the stream, so I thought maybe there was some real potential here.

The way I saw it, Azeirf was not related to anybody in the named cast.  But she was born the same day as Trunks, for extra irony.  Fast forward to Age 779.  Sorbet and Tagoma travel to Earth to use the Dragon Balls, intending to resurrect Frieza, but Shenron says “No can do, that one’s soul has already been reborn on this world.”

To this Sorbet says, “Whatever you have to do, please bring our master back!”  This is just vague enough for Shenron to work with, so he locates the soul in question and reawakens in 13-year-old Azeirf the memories of her past life.  The rule is that Shenron can’t grant a wish that affects somebody stronger than him without their consent, but at this point in time, Azeirf isn’t stronger than Shenron.  She has great untapped potential, just like Uub, but no awareness or ability to access it.  Until now.

The newly awakened Azeirf has all of Frieza’s memories and cunning.   Combined with her human knowledge of this world, it is a simple matter to locate Capsule Corp in West City.  Over the next four months, she starts training, orchestrates a meet cute with Trunks, ingratiates herself with the Brief family, and gets her little hands on technology sufficient to communicate with the Frieza Force remnants (whom had since retreated to space in disappointment).

A plan is devised: Azeirf stages her own kidnapping by the Frieza Force, knowing that a large scale invasion will draw out Goku and Vegeta (whom have been training on Beerus’ planet this whole time).  Just when the Z Fighters (plus Trunks and Goten, whom are there to rescue their friend) think they have everything under control, a spine-chillingly familiar laugh rings out:

“Ooooh ho ho ho ho!  My hatred for you transcends life and death!  Behold, the face of your doom!”

Azeirf’s skin turns gold and her hair purple as she unleashes a power beyond what Frieza ever had.  Now she is Golden Azeirf!  While her power may be a match for the likes of SSGSS Goku and Vegeta at first, she hadn’t reckoned that her dainty human body doesn’t have the stamina to keep it up for long.
Vegeta has no mercy for the girl and plans to vaporize the reincarnation of his hated foe, but Trunks interposes himself.  "Don’t do it, dad!  She’s not all bad, I know it!“  Goten is right there at his side.  "We both made friends with her, there’s no way it was all a lie!”  This is enough to win over Goku.  Vegeta is unconvinced, but relents for his son’s sake.

Azeirf’s first instinct is to use this opportunity and the last of her power to destroy the planet, taking them all with her.  But in this moment of compassion, she has to admit, the human part of her … kinda does like Trunks.  A little.  Maybe.  Uhg, the half-breed son of a filthy monkey?  Disgusting!

Nevertheless, Azeirf gives up.  She knows the Saiyans like a challenge, so she will consent to withdraw this day and come back to give them a better fight later.  Azeirf turns up her nose at Trunks: “This doesn’t mean I like you or anything!”
a.k.a. “What if Frieza was reincarnated as a human?”

Pieced together and reposted from MasakoX's subreddit.

P.S. In my head, Azeirf is still voiced by Ryusei Nakao, except he’s using a falsetto. =P
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