snickiedude's avatar
is not actually a dude.
52 Watchers18.6K Page Views291 Deviations

FFM 2020 30

F

FFM 2020 30

"Can you play like Squidward???" Sigh. Deep breath. She's six; she doesn't know any better. Squawk! Squeak honk squawk! The kids giggle and laugh while I hold back tears. Look what they made me do to my baby, my prefect reed. "Did you know Squidward isn't actually bad at clarinet?" the resident meme master states. "He sounds bad because he's playing underwater." Deep breaths. It's okay, Squidward isn't -  "Who would put a clarinet underwater? You'd ruin the instrument." "It's just a -" "Squidward is bad at clarinet because he has tentacles, no fingers. He's pressing all the buttons at once." "Oh."

FFM 2020 29

F

FFM 2020 29

“I want to go swimming but it’s thundering.” Jenna checks the radar. “Looks like these are pop-up storms, not really moving anywhere. You could probably jump in the pool and swim like two laps and hop out.” “But it’s thundering!” Jenna shrugs. “Then don’t swim.” “That’s not helping! I want to swim!” “Then... swim. You’ve got time.” “But it’s thundering.”

FFM 2020 27 - Mutual Motives

F

FFM 2020 27 - Mutual Motives

Annie is small and pale, with a fighter’s physique. She’ll look like a whale soon enough though. Caitlin is tall and just tan enough that onlookers at the public pool silently question her race. Her physique is much leaner, perhaps an illusion given by her height, lending her the appearance of a grasshopper. Between the two of them and within an about five feet radius around either of them, there is not even a single ripple on the surface of the pool. “So how’s school?” Annie finally says. “Oh, you know,” Caitlin muses. “Stressful.” “Ah. I feel that.” “Uh-huh.” The silence that hangs over the pair is palpable. A six-year-old enters their five-foot radius chasing after a toy, panics, and swims away screaming. Nobody hears him until he exits the radius, and then all eyes are back on the pair of metas huddled in the corner of the pool. The toy magically makes its way back to the kid. The radius of silence expands another foot. “So,” says Caitlin after the eyes start turning away.

FFM 2020 26 - Out

F

FFM 2020 26 - Out

"He's a good guy," says Jenna. "He would make a suitable life partner." "Suitable?" "We have similar beliefs and similar enough interests and enough common sense that we can debate and not resent each other at the end. He's intelligent too. Knows how to cook." "But you don't like him." "Of course I like him, I just…" Jenna heaves a sigh. "Platonically I'm very open to him. Romantically I'm very lukewarm. I don't have a particular desire to kiss him or anything like that." “That’s normal.” “Apparently not,” says Jenna. He wants a girlfriend, maybe even a wife. He wants her. But she doesn’t want him, not like that. But she does want him. , “You know, when I had crushes on boys, it was usually boys that I was already friends with. Like ‘ooh, he talks to me and he’s funny.’ Those were the boys I fantasized about.” Jenna blinks. “You know, in the LGBT community, they would call that demisexuality. Like you’re not physically attracted to a guy until you’re already emotionally

FFM 2020 31

F

FFM 2020 31

“I’m going to need you to get rid of the squirrels in your hair before we get started.” “Oh! I should have known that, terribly sorry,” says Freddie. “They live there for warmth. Guess it’s unsanitary or something. What was I thinking, bringing them to a dentist appointment?” “Indeed,” says the dental assistant. “But the real problem is that Doctor Karwowski is allergic.” “...I hope she has Allegra.” One sneezy dental consult and a half dozen masks later, Freddie walks out of the dental clinic with explicit instructions to lay off on the Sun Carbon. They’re nuts if they think xe’ll actually do it. That stuff is clean and the best energy drink xe could find that doesn’t make xir heart race. It always loses, anyway, in its self-imposed half marathons. There’s a vending machine in the nearby park. Freddie goes to it and feeds it some coins. The machine says thank you and spits out a Sun Carbon. Xe stares at its other offerings before buying a can of tomato juice as well for xir

FFM 2020 28

F

FFM 2020 28

A cow pasture. In the middle of the city. A bright green field of tall grass and a line of distant, dark green trees that top the hill and hide more skyscrapers on the other side. The barbed wire fence with a gaping hole about the width of a pregnant cow. And no cows. “So where’d they go?” Her eyes twitch, scanning the historic brick street - out of place in a city full of asphalt and cement - for any signs of cows. Manure. Displaced old loose bricks. Scrapes on the corners of buildings from too-big trailers squeezing into the too-narrow street. Cows don’t just vanish into thin air. She puts a hand to the ground. Sorting out and identifying vibrations proves difficult with millions of potential sources. Filtering out the white noise to find the source required. Oh. How simple. Three-quarters of a mile down the road, inside the disused civic center with interior decoration that screams "1970s", the local capes gape at the non-humanoid inhabitants. "So what do we do?" asks the tin

FFM 2020 22

F

FFM 2020 22

Little girl, nine, what are you doing tonight? I’m hiding under the stairs from the big scary storm. It’s gonna rip our house apart but in the inside closet with no wind, everything that I love will be safe. Everything? Well, not everything. It’s only a few hours of rattling and crying and flying tree branches, but then tomorrow we go to dig our friends out of the wreckage. , Big party soon! Will you be there? I cried at the last party. We’re going north with everything we love. Everything? Well, not everything. Our friends are leaving too, but they and their pets will be there for the party in the house on the big hill. Please be nice to them. Don’t worry, we’ll save some afterparty for you. Can’t let you miss out on all the fun! , Surprise party! The fuck is this? Your buddy just had a party here two weeks ago. Go away. Yeah, but I wasn’t invited. Fuck you, I’m coming anyway. Fuck you and fuck everything. Everything? Well, not everything. Parties are better with friends. That way we

FFM 2020 23 - Agent of Orange

F

FFM 2020 23 - Agent of Orange

Snickie shuts the laptop. Ugh, this challenge. What am I supposed to do? No, seriously, what am I supposed to do? She opens it again because she immediately forgot what she was supposed to do and it’s on her laptop. Also, Google Docs where she writes her stories is more accessible from the laptop. “The hell is Discordianism, anyway? Not some kind of ploy to get more people into the Discord channel, I’m sure. The collaboration challenge’ll take care of that.” The collaboration challenge. Ugh. Hydra’s been hinting at it for well over a week now. Smashing her head seems like a really good idea. Also painful. Let’s not do that. Even though it’s totally Snickie’s fault that she’s so behind on Flash Fiction Month and on studying for Solid Mechanics. The test is next week and Snickie hasn’t even cracked open the eBook for the chapters it’s on. Better get a move on or you’ll be stuck with a C in a Very Important Class. Snickie gets up and heads into the kitchen. I’ll be able to study once

FFM 2020 24

F

FFM 2020 24

Sharlene arrives at work to the sight of a long line of late-teenagers and early-twenty-somethings and one or two middle-aged folks. She is confused - it isn't exam season yet - until she pushes past them to the front desk and the badge scanner refuses to acknowledge her credentials. A system-wide network failure, the student in the front of the line explains to her. Just what she needs. It does explain why there has been no email about it though. But IT is working on it, says her colleague who is on her cell phone with them now. They should have it back up and running any time, they say. And the exam is due today, and the professor isn’t answering his email (big surprise). So the students stay. "Any time" doesn't come quickly. Some students have sat down to study in the hall. Others pace anxiously back and forth - "I don't think studying will help me at this point." Sharlene watches them wear a hole in the floor with their pacing. She can't do anything until the system comes back

FFM 2020 25

F

FFM 2020 25

The City always works: it has sidewalks and buildings, and that one cat that people always call about getting stuck on the fire escape. Most of the time, the cat could get down on its own if it wanted to, and even if it fell it would land well. But Deadra rescues them anyway, just for the smiles of the children. (Think of the children!) And it’s a nice break from bashing in the heads of mob bosses hooking street kids on drugs, making Lovelady’s night job easier in the meantime. Oh, the joys of being a superhuman who can easily run on no sleep for days at a time. Deadra swoops into the police station, her latest catch draped over her shoulder: a thief who had stolen a pair of samurai swords from a shop in the city's Asian district in a foolhardy attempt to use them to take down the resident supers, namely Deadra herself. The fight had been easy, as is wont to happen when your skin is like titanium. The only reason to have broken a sweat was that it was 96 F and the sun was only
See all

FFM 2020 30

F

FFM 2020 30

"Can you play like Squidward???" Sigh. Deep breath. She's six; she doesn't know any better. Squawk! Squeak honk squawk! The kids giggle and laugh while I hold back tears. Look what they made me do to my baby, my prefect reed. "Did you know Squidward isn't actually bad at clarinet?" the resident meme master states. "He sounds bad because he's playing underwater." Deep breaths. It's okay, Squidward isn't -  "Who would put a clarinet underwater? You'd ruin the instrument." "It's just a -" "Squidward is bad at clarinet because he has tentacles, no fingers. He's pressing all the buttons at once." "Oh."

FFM 2020 29

F

FFM 2020 29

“I want to go swimming but it’s thundering.” Jenna checks the radar. “Looks like these are pop-up storms, not really moving anywhere. You could probably jump in the pool and swim like two laps and hop out.” “But it’s thundering!” Jenna shrugs. “Then don’t swim.” “That’s not helping! I want to swim!” “Then... swim. You’ve got time.” “But it’s thundering.”

FFM 2020 27 - Mutual Motives

F

FFM 2020 27 - Mutual Motives

Annie is small and pale, with a fighter’s physique. She’ll look like a whale soon enough though. Caitlin is tall and just tan enough that onlookers at the public pool silently question her race. Her physique is much leaner, perhaps an illusion given by her height, lending her the appearance of a grasshopper. Between the two of them and within an about five feet radius around either of them, there is not even a single ripple on the surface of the pool. “So how’s school?” Annie finally says. “Oh, you know,” Caitlin muses. “Stressful.” “Ah. I feel that.” “Uh-huh.” The silence that hangs over the pair is palpable. A six-year-old enters their five-foot radius chasing after a toy, panics, and swims away screaming. Nobody hears him until he exits the radius, and then all eyes are back on the pair of metas huddled in the corner of the pool. The toy magically makes its way back to the kid. The radius of silence expands another foot. “So,” says Caitlin after the eyes start turning away.

FFM 2020 26 - Out

F

FFM 2020 26 - Out

"He's a good guy," says Jenna. "He would make a suitable life partner." "Suitable?" "We have similar beliefs and similar enough interests and enough common sense that we can debate and not resent each other at the end. He's intelligent too. Knows how to cook." "But you don't like him." "Of course I like him, I just…" Jenna heaves a sigh. "Platonically I'm very open to him. Romantically I'm very lukewarm. I don't have a particular desire to kiss him or anything like that." “That’s normal.” “Apparently not,” says Jenna. He wants a girlfriend, maybe even a wife. He wants her. But she doesn’t want him, not like that. But she does want him. , “You know, when I had crushes on boys, it was usually boys that I was already friends with. Like ‘ooh, he talks to me and he’s funny.’ Those were the boys I fantasized about.” Jenna blinks. “You know, in the LGBT community, they would call that demisexuality. Like you’re not physically attracted to a guy until you’re already emotionally

FFM 2020 31

F

FFM 2020 31

“I’m going to need you to get rid of the squirrels in your hair before we get started.” “Oh! I should have known that, terribly sorry,” says Freddie. “They live there for warmth. Guess it’s unsanitary or something. What was I thinking, bringing them to a dentist appointment?” “Indeed,” says the dental assistant. “But the real problem is that Doctor Karwowski is allergic.” “...I hope she has Allegra.” One sneezy dental consult and a half dozen masks later, Freddie walks out of the dental clinic with explicit instructions to lay off on the Sun Carbon. They’re nuts if they think xe’ll actually do it. That stuff is clean and the best energy drink xe could find that doesn’t make xir heart race. It always loses, anyway, in its self-imposed half marathons. There’s a vending machine in the nearby park. Freddie goes to it and feeds it some coins. The machine says thank you and spits out a Sun Carbon. Xe stares at its other offerings before buying a can of tomato juice as well for xir

FFM 2020 28

F

FFM 2020 28

A cow pasture. In the middle of the city. A bright green field of tall grass and a line of distant, dark green trees that top the hill and hide more skyscrapers on the other side. The barbed wire fence with a gaping hole about the width of a pregnant cow. And no cows. “So where’d they go?” Her eyes twitch, scanning the historic brick street - out of place in a city full of asphalt and cement - for any signs of cows. Manure. Displaced old loose bricks. Scrapes on the corners of buildings from too-big trailers squeezing into the too-narrow street. Cows don’t just vanish into thin air. She puts a hand to the ground. Sorting out and identifying vibrations proves difficult with millions of potential sources. Filtering out the white noise to find the source required. Oh. How simple. Three-quarters of a mile down the road, inside the disused civic center with interior decoration that screams "1970s", the local capes gape at the non-humanoid inhabitants. "So what do we do?" asks the tin

FFM 2020 22

F

FFM 2020 22

Little girl, nine, what are you doing tonight? I’m hiding under the stairs from the big scary storm. It’s gonna rip our house apart but in the inside closet with no wind, everything that I love will be safe. Everything? Well, not everything. It’s only a few hours of rattling and crying and flying tree branches, but then tomorrow we go to dig our friends out of the wreckage. , Big party soon! Will you be there? I cried at the last party. We’re going north with everything we love. Everything? Well, not everything. Our friends are leaving too, but they and their pets will be there for the party in the house on the big hill. Please be nice to them. Don’t worry, we’ll save some afterparty for you. Can’t let you miss out on all the fun! , Surprise party! The fuck is this? Your buddy just had a party here two weeks ago. Go away. Yeah, but I wasn’t invited. Fuck you, I’m coming anyway. Fuck you and fuck everything. Everything? Well, not everything. Parties are better with friends. That way we

FFM 2020 23 - Agent of Orange

F

FFM 2020 23 - Agent of Orange

Snickie shuts the laptop. Ugh, this challenge. What am I supposed to do? No, seriously, what am I supposed to do? She opens it again because she immediately forgot what she was supposed to do and it’s on her laptop. Also, Google Docs where she writes her stories is more accessible from the laptop. “The hell is Discordianism, anyway? Not some kind of ploy to get more people into the Discord channel, I’m sure. The collaboration challenge’ll take care of that.” The collaboration challenge. Ugh. Hydra’s been hinting at it for well over a week now. Smashing her head seems like a really good idea. Also painful. Let’s not do that. Even though it’s totally Snickie’s fault that she’s so behind on Flash Fiction Month and on studying for Solid Mechanics. The test is next week and Snickie hasn’t even cracked open the eBook for the chapters it’s on. Better get a move on or you’ll be stuck with a C in a Very Important Class. Snickie gets up and heads into the kitchen. I’ll be able to study once

FFM 2020 24

F

FFM 2020 24

Sharlene arrives at work to the sight of a long line of late-teenagers and early-twenty-somethings and one or two middle-aged folks. She is confused - it isn't exam season yet - until she pushes past them to the front desk and the badge scanner refuses to acknowledge her credentials. A system-wide network failure, the student in the front of the line explains to her. Just what she needs. It does explain why there has been no email about it though. But IT is working on it, says her colleague who is on her cell phone with them now. They should have it back up and running any time, they say. And the exam is due today, and the professor isn’t answering his email (big surprise). So the students stay. "Any time" doesn't come quickly. Some students have sat down to study in the hall. Others pace anxiously back and forth - "I don't think studying will help me at this point." Sharlene watches them wear a hole in the floor with their pacing. She can't do anything until the system comes back

FFM 2020 25

F

FFM 2020 25

The City always works: it has sidewalks and buildings, and that one cat that people always call about getting stuck on the fire escape. Most of the time, the cat could get down on its own if it wanted to, and even if it fell it would land well. But Deadra rescues them anyway, just for the smiles of the children. (Think of the children!) And it’s a nice break from bashing in the heads of mob bosses hooking street kids on drugs, making Lovelady’s night job easier in the meantime. Oh, the joys of being a superhuman who can easily run on no sleep for days at a time. Deadra swoops into the police station, her latest catch draped over her shoulder: a thief who had stolen a pair of samurai swords from a shop in the city's Asian district in a foolhardy attempt to use them to take down the resident supers, namely Deadra herself. The fight had been easy, as is wont to happen when your skin is like titanium. The only reason to have broken a sweat was that it was 96 F and the sun was only
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Well Disguised

W

Well Disguised

Banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana banana bandana.

Arnold The Sentient Pina Colada's Very Busy Day

A

Arnold The Sentient Pina Colada's Very Busy Day

EXT. LEAKY BOTTOMS BOAT RENTAL - EVENING ARNOLD THE SENTIENT PIÑA COLADA sits at the front desk of his beachside establishment, LEAKY BOTTOMS BOAT RENTAL. Row upon row of kayaks and catamarans lie untouched upon the sand. It is late in the day. It is evident from the neatness of the ranks of boats that there have been no customers. JOLENE, a perfectly ordinary jellyfish, drifts about in a shallow rock pool nearby. ARNOLD and JOLENE listen to upbeat reggae music emanating from a cheap, wind-up RADIO that also rests upon the front desk. ARNOLD Nice weather. Mild. JOLENE propels herself into the side of the rock pool, pauses, then reverses direction. ARNOLD You said it. Surprised we haven't seen more business today, really. I wonder if it's because... JOLENE drifts lethargically towards the other side of the rock pool. The light is getting low, and - as a perfectly ordinary jellyfish - she is becoming lethargic now that dark is falling. ARNOLD What a remarkably succinct summary of
Artist // Hobbyist // Varied
  • May 30, 1995
  • United States
  • Deviant for 12 years
  • She / Her
Badges
Super Albino: Llamas are awesome! (211)
Birthday '17: Celebrated DeviantArt's 17th birthday
Fan Art Mashup Challenge: Took the Fan Art Mashup Challenge
DeviantArt Originals: Participated in April Fools' Day 2018
Paranoid: Wears a tinfoil hat
Khush: Participated in April Fools' Day 2019
My Bio
IxTP | gave up on figuring out my enneagram | Phlegmatic-Melancholic | She/Her | Dream journal goes back to 2010 with some even earlier entries

Obviously Snickie is not my real name but the name of my online persona. I hope you'll forgive me if I say I don't trust most random strangers on the internet. ;)

Current Residence: Florida
OS: Windows 10
Can do: semi-realistic amateur pencil drawings, novice anime style, portraits, (humanoid) character design, fanfiction, occasional poetry
Also like: photography sometimes, fractals
Fandoms: Code Lyoko, Yu-Gi-Oh DM, SAO (before s2), Star Trek DS9, Steven Universe, Naruto

I currently do not accept commissions. I procrastinate on important life stuff enough already. ;)

I accept llama trades. I also give llamas for favs. Now, if you fav something of mine and I've already given you a llama, ... I'll get back to you on that. Maybe.
No need to thank me for llamas, faves, or watches - pay it forward!~

I am terrible about replying to comments and such mostly because I don't know what to say and then six months pass by and I forget and by the time I remember it's been an awkwardly long radio silence. ^^;

Personal Quote: Procrastinate now. Don't put it off! -- Ellen DeGeneres

Favourite Bands / Musical Artists
Dream Theater, Yes, Chicago, Frederick Delius, David Maslanka, Piotr Tchaikovsky
Favourite Games
Cantr II
Favourite Gaming Platform
PC
Tools of the Trade
Pencils, watercolor pencils, Inkscape, Paint.NET, FreshPaint, Photoshop Elements 7, Canon PowerShot A1000 IS, Sharpies, S Note
Other Interests
life, music, clarinet, calculus, typology, medical sciences, sushi, Cantr, drawing, fanfic
11 days until Flash Fiction Month 2020 begins. *stress stress stress stress* *hype hype hype hype*
Nothing like doing a digital art drawing and being well into it, and then you flip the image horizontally and realize your lineart is all sorts of f#@%ed up and nothing lines up and this is not supposed to be a Picasso painting, okay. :XD: 

old meme

old meme

Stolen from someone HAVE YOU EVER: ● dated someone twice? Considering I've only ever dated once, .... ● been cheated on? I hope not? ● kissed someone & regretted it? Forced familial affection. (No, nothing R rated.) I only kiss my cats now. ● lost someone special? Yes ● been depressed? I had a few bad months in fourth grade. ● fallen for a friend? Maybe? I don't actually know. I'm pretty stunted in that emotional department. ● broken someones heart? Probably. Not intentionally. ● turned someone down? Yes    THIS YEAR HAVE YOU: ● made a new friend? Yes. ● laughed unti

Comments 152

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Thanks for the fav!:)

Thanks for the favorite, snickie-not-actually-a-dude! This isn't my real name either.

:D lol No problemo. I enjoyed it immensely.


Wow, so many people on here who don't go by their real names!

Thanks for the watch, Snickie!

Lol it took long enough for me to do it :)

lol yes, shame on you! Now I guess I should create some actual content if somebody is actually watching.

Thank you for the :+fav: