Falling down is how we grow

15 min read

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::Today's News::
I spent most of last night watching movies, chowing down on Banana pudding ice-cream and junk food. Yes, I will admit I am a Junk food Junkie!
Any-hoot I watched Alice in wonderland for the very first time. I kept asking myself throughout the movie how and why I went year’s with-out watching it. It truly inspired me and I found myself watching just about every version of it. It really got my mind racing about life, people, the past, present, future, and everything in between. As I am sure for those who have read my previous post. You all can tell I have been kind of stuck in a rut. We all know life can be extremely hard at times. It’s like you try so hard to move forward and can’t. Eventually, the worse gets the best of you. And you slowly begin to believe life, everything, and everyone around you are your enemy. Sometimes I feel like my life resembles “The Truman show” but more on an evil horror side. Where, the whole town knows you and everything about you. As if people are plotting on the next best thing to make your life more difficult.
But on to where I was getting at. While I pondered on all these thoughts; I asked myself is the universe really to blame? Maybe it’s not everything else, and maybe it’s just me. Questioning what point in my life did I take the wrong turn? I know there were many times when growing up I had gone down the wrong path of life. However, I learned from them and always found my way back.
I realize the last two years I have been walking with the devil, and down yet another one of those paths. When my father passed, I had lost the person that I really am. I pushed away everyone who was important to me, and gave up on many of the things I once was passionate about. I realize my actions and attitude is the only thing to blame. While watching Alice in wonderland I found myself feeling content, a feeling I have not felt for a very long time. I was inspired by all the interesting characters, the effects, and sceneries. During this moment I felt a strong breeze come through the window. When I turned and looked outside. There he was; a beautiful owl peeking out the owl house hanging from the tree. At that very moment I felt a strong presence in the room. Taking in a deep breath I whispered “Dad, I love you I miss you, and I need you and tears began rolling down my cheeks. The wind blew again picking up a swisher sweets cigar scent. I couldn’t help but cry and smile at the same time. Has I was 110% sure my father was there with me. He adored owls along with eagles, Loved watching movies in the dark as he drank shots of hard liquor and smoked a swisher sweet cigar.
Before bed last night I prayed for the very first time. Shortly after without realizing it I fell asleep at the kitchen table and woke up this morning to the sun beaming into my eyes. I looked up and across from me was my son sitting there all bright eyed preparing himself a bowl of corn flakes. He looked up with a smile, and said Good morning mommy would you like some breakfast? I looked back with tears of joy in my eyes. That moment all I could do was smile. I wanted to pause time and cherish it forever. We sat there for a good while talking. I was at peace I felt like I had finely found myself and the person I was before. The person I wanted to be, the person I needed to be, and the person my son also needed me to be. I knew I was where I belonged.
“I have decided that today would be the new day. That from here on out I will walk with god by my side and have faith in him. I will no longer dwell on the negative but focus on the positive.”

Thanks for listening, :tighthug:

:: Today's Favorite::
: Considering I am feeling so amazing today and back to myself. I thought I would Feature some of my (today’s favorites). :heart:
:thumb328440818: Autumn drops by xxida Sweet Lullaby by SwiFecS Walk With Me by MichalKownacki Tiny Baby 2 by Metterschlingel Eiffel Tower by cloe-may clock by cloe-may:thumb328083733: A Time for Magic by melilotmaranwe An Elven Fairy's Backyard by BlackMageAlodia Fairy Dust by MissUnfortunate Little Fairy by deathbycanon Alice in Wonderland by kirawinter Definitely time for tea by Mimi-93 Vintage Red Apple by jstyle23 ladybug - vintage by vxside hope by Megson there's  always hope. by this-is-the-life2905 Shuttered Memories by crackedbliss Colorful memories by EliseEnchanted Memories by ahermin:thumb303839963::thumb161784417::thumb216623383: Eurasian Eagle Owl by In-the-picture Key to Wonderland by ShadowinLight Mushrooms by WouterPera ..::Autumn Wonderland::.. by Whimsical-Dreams Winter In Wonderland ll by littlemewhatever Escape To Wonderland by oO-Rein-Oo Wonderland by ClefairyKid To Wonderland by HQheart Time for Wonderland by Glittercandy Magic Wonderland. by NFstar Magic by stardixa Magic by rad-ix Make a wish by ntpdang Hot Chocolate by LeoSous dice splash by Maegondo:thumb288310425:

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Gitbitwu's avatar
:iconwipetearsplz: Be strong friend..... :) Never let anyone stop you .... :)
SnapColorCreations's avatar
:iconnekushikikiss1plz::iconnekushikikiss2plz: Thank you so much for your kindness and support Hun. It really does mean a lot. Hope you have a wonderful day :iconflyingheartsplz:
Gitbitwu's avatar
(You are very welcome :) You too)
crackedbliss's avatar
aw thank you so much dear. :heart: :kiss:
SnapColorCreations's avatar
Metterschlingel's avatar
thank you so much for featuring :huggle:
SnapColorCreations's avatar
You're welcome Hun it was my pleasure. :huggle:
Minophelia's avatar
Thank you for the feature ^^ :heart:
SnapColorCreations's avatar
You're welcome Hun it was my pleasure. :heart:
HQheart's avatar
Thanks for including me in such a lovely feature :heart:
SnapColorCreations's avatar
Thank you Hun and your welcome it was my pleasure. :heart:
melilotmaranwe's avatar
First and most importantly: I am so very sorry to hear about your struggles! Let me know if there's anything I can do for you. :hug:
And second; Thank you so much for the feature, I really appreciate it! :heart:
SnapColorCreations's avatar
Thank you for your kindness Hun, and your very welcome. :huggle:
Selaks's avatar
I'm sorry to hear you went through hard times :heart: I hope everything gets better for you :nod:
SnapColorCreations's avatar
Thank you for your kindness Hun :heart:
Selaks's avatar
:) It's always better to have someone's support in tough times. I know what it feels like :nod:
ntpdang's avatar
Thanks for the feature! :heart:
SnapColorCreations's avatar
You're welcome Hun it was my pleasure. :hheart:
Foxfan1992's avatar
Awww, that's adorable :)

I agree. When my friend didn't want to be around me anymore, I felt the same way. I pushed everyone else away trying to be strong, but my heart was grieving for the loss of the person I loved like I would my own little brother. But over time, I've moved on and realized there are much more important things to think about, although I keep my friend alive in my heart as my beloved character, Timothy. :)
SnapColorCreations's avatar
Thank you Hun, :huggle:
I defiantly can relate to that. It can be hard, when your very best friend decides to ditch you, or decides not to be around you anymore. I have also had many so called friends who have totally ditched me. One in particular was a friend I had met back in 3rd grade. We spent practically everyday together up until high-school ended. Through out those years we was constantly getting into trouble. Got in with the wrong crowds, started doing the wrong things. But I got pregnant got a job and started changing my life around. Sad thing is I still was there for her. When she called me out of the blue in need etc. I have not heard from her though sense I moved to Florida. Last I knew she was still into hard drugs and in trouble with the law. Even though at first I was confused and didn't understand why she hated me. But, realize now that it was for the best. I still pray and think of her from time to time. Anyways I will shut-up now :heart: have a wonderful day.
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