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The matter we're made of.
Silk. Wrapped itself around my neck,
Like it owned me.
Until, on the edge of this precipice I stood,
And the wind,
Which had travelled across the sea
Whips around my body.
Batters the bare cliff.
And took the scarf from me.
Delicately dancing and contorting in the wind.
Matching the movements of the waves below.
I think of you.
Unexpectedly losing myself.
Stolen moments.
The air that runs through us.
Owning us.
And the waves that run across my skin.
Your fingers or my mind?
I feel it in my blood.
Dancing, contorting, with your body below.
Do we dance with the sea too?
Velvet. Slips off my shoulders for the fourth time that evening.
Never staying still on my body.
Or is it my body that keeps moving?
To feel the nectar running over me,
Like liquid marble.
Smooth, rich movements as it runs between my fingers.
My legs between your legs.
Wrapped around my shoulders.
Wrapped around your hips.
Somehow luxurious.
Do you keep moving or is it I?
Shaking beneath your lips.
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simbiotic tricks
Rosy cheeks, heart beats
Soft, loud, soft, loud
My lips warm
Your chest proud
We lose the edges of ourselves
As into the night our bodies fray
Hands running on hands
blood rushing,
Left my dreams in disarray
Then falls a soft silence
Comforted by light that filters in
A golden truce, between my mind
And your skin
An end to the chaos, to the symbiotic tricks
Back to the walls, the room, the bricks
back to the books, our bodies alone
the two of us seperated,
together, known
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Creative life
The creativity is in these bones
You can hear it in these harsh tones
Pulling the world down, and you, carelessly
                         taking over me
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What do you do to me?
Shivers down the spine
reach and expand
and shrink away
the very cells that hold me together
hold onto each other
scared that if they let go
Ill disintegrate
And the blood I feel thumping
in my head
in your chest
filled with the cells that
Taking each their
small part, from my full heart
and delivering it
to another inch of skin and bone
so I feel you under my fingernails
I feel you in my hips
I feel you in the tender trails
left behind from your finger tips
Even when you move away
My body resists and
the feeling persists
from body to mind
from mind to heart
I wouldn't want to stop and think
in case I come apart
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In the roots: where love is found
The roots of two trees meet
Here is where their fate
Is found
The branches of one
Reach out to dreams
Pushing new shoots through the seams
The branches of the other
lean in for an embrace
with their adventurous lover
The roots of two trees meet
That's where love is found
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Whispering dreams capture my heart and  imagination
Catch me by surprise though they were my own creation
As the films roll in my mind I fill with a new sensation
Somewhere between elation and trepidation
The colours are vibrant
The sound is muted
The flowers blossom
And I am rooted
The leaves reach out
Shadowing the stream
A sigh sounds out
Nothing but a dream
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A fairy tale
The poison wraps around the apple
Wraps around her lips
It slips down her throat just as it
Slides along her finger tips
The unexpected intrusion
Of a silent sleeping death
A life without a motion
But with a heartbeat and breath
Until a kiss comes calling
of love, sweet and true
only then can spring return
and bring her smile anew
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One falls into the other
The sea washes over my feet
washes away the dirt of roads traveled
reveals the soft flesh, the cuts and bruises
hidden under dust and gravel
The night falls into the day
The horizon floats mysteriously at the centre of my view
An undetermined line that in the darkness withdrew
The sea and the sky cannot be held or owned
here we can feel the fragility of responsibility
we can feel the invincibility of our beliefs break away
The day falls into the night
The dawn shines a light again on a line we see as real
yet can never be reached
The horizon is as exact as the boundaries of skin
and as vague as the concept of love,
it disintegrates under tension
strengthens under apprehension,
The rain falls and dissolves into the sea,
the night falls, you dissolve into me,
an explicit and express act, as hard as the words it's written in,
contrary to belief we do not know when we know,
we know when we question,
when we listen to contradiction and suggestion,
when we feel the ambiguity between the day
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The woods grow longer. Not only in the lengthening of the shadows of the murky autumn leaves and the branches stretching covered in fungus, but also each second is drawn out, echoing until you feel like time has stopped before it drops away and the next one starts up. The sounds too grow in breadth and depth, until almost breaking the thin layer between the cold fresh air and your brain, holding your insanity captive, before creeping away again.
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A little help
It became hard to see our way back
The view behind us had grown murky
In front a few stars shine but
They only offer shimmering ideals that can't be grasped
There's nothing to hold on to now
I tripped and fell, but you held out a hand
I thought I would slip away like the sand
In the hour glass that sits in the old fire place
Growing old and slipping into unknown waters
Uncharted territory, perhaps never to be found
But you offer something, something small
Something that might just get me off the ground
And perhaps, if I'm looking hard enough
I'll catch a glimmer of your face
Something to remember in this nothingness,
something that stands out in space
More concrete than the stars,
Clearer than the fog behind
You offer a little sun light
Lifting the darkness of the blind
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A lost friend
Expelled. By a system, an institution.
Not a bad example, not an example at all.
Ignored and alone.
I pick up the phone to talk with you.
To speak with another human.
But a strange voice is on the other end of the line.
Says their fine.
I move forward with a sensation of loss.
But what do I know?
What seeds we sow,
and you helped me, helped transform me from bud to flower, watched my life grow.
As you were falling, out, away, being pushed and letting go.
I thought I'd hear your voice again but I didn't.
Not even words written in pen or embedded on the screen of my phone.
You were reaching for so long.
You were holding on so strong.
But push.
Push. Push
The system wanted you out.
And finally you had only one choice.
You had no home, you had no voice.
You went the only direction you could.
Now I stand where you stood. See what you saw.
And it's an empty view.
While the people buy buy buy, you could see nothing new.
I will continue to move forward, and hold on to you.
Hold on to what
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My Body is not big enough for what is going on inside
So I throw the paint down, write words upon words
Hoping to capture the thoughts and ideas,
I write of journeys and motions, the paint turns into colours and birds
The activity is frantic, to start with the therapy is not clear
Whether it will go somewhere, end; I feel flutters of fear
But I trust in the process, the waiting, and being
The miniature explosions that ripple through my bones
Trying to tear through my skin, leave my body to air
Under the pressure my mind and muscle groans
Yet here on the page, the meaning starts to appear
The imagery, the language, the symbols speak to the mind
At times I'm not sure who is in control, me or the paper
At times I'm scared I'll use so much colour I'll go blind
And the paper fills. The thoughts sit still for a moment
Peace is had, nothing is boiling over.
My soul is simmering nicely, like water in the pot
Until the next spark of a match that heats up the mix
Of emotions, ideas, thoughts
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Tenderness shifts
the music falls between our ears,
between your resting breaths,
between my breasts and your chest which expands and falls,
   falls like the snow,
               and seemingly forever,
the way the moments feel when we are together,
and so often life rushes on, like this poem,
trying to race down the words,
trying to capture the flight of birds,
but there is a delicacy I have to leave in my head,
 a Tenderness that cannot be said,
  that I feel between you and between me,
    where the music falls.
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Sweet nursery rhyme
You taste like a nursery rhyme
Sweet on the ear
But bent towards inciting fear
What wolves lurk in the dark
the safety net of your dulcet tones
Like a nightingale
Traps me and like a fish
I think I'm swimming to freedom
But I’m not following a trail
creating circles in this glass jar
Where yellow eyes and viscous smiles
Bearing teeth gaze over me
And any chance of escape I had
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The time that I write
I'm writing while no one is listening
Yet we are listening to the old sounds,
When the snow falls - the old grounds are glistening
Silence prevails, no-one can hear the shadows moan from underneath
muffled in their fear, muted in their grief,
I'm writing while no one is listening
It's easier this way, when there is no impact
to your footfall, not like the white floor outside
where you can stamp your pride
and it can be seen by everyone, you're having fun,
and you had it first
I'm writing while no one is listening
scared that someone would know I said it first
or last, or know I said it at all,
I want to know neither the rise nor the fall
of my actions, or my interactions, if any
Yet it could be said that no one is listening, while I am writing
ashamed to see the internal fighting,
of the mind, they remain blind.
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What time is | Take One
No way to measure time
Mixed up in pleasure and rhyme
Two bodies, two minds,
Talk about it. Think about it.
Silence. Except the sound of shivering skin
Glistening in the light, quivering sin.
Between night and day.
The sounds of dusk.
The light of dawn, indulged in your musk.
Work, play and sleep.
Runs by so fast but the minutes creep.
Your words begin and my body ends.
Your fingers scatter across me, searching.
The conversation extends. Rising.
My eyes soak up your skin, your lips.
As they chatter. And my body sings.
We are lifted as with wings, with rhythm and pace
But drifting like a feather, this isn’t a race.
The faster our blood runs, the slower time flows
And when two veins feel like one,
Two bodies fall under the sun
There is no way to measure the time
We can count only in pleasure and rhyme
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What is time | second take
I can hear our pulse beat the seconds,
in the room, the body, the moment
at the speed of your heart
as it pounds between our fingers
Yet sometimes lingers with the pace of my sighs
Relativity is all that we have. Our bodies grow in sync
with the way they move and the way that we think
and now our movements can help us render
what time is, it’s fierce and it’s tender
and what better than this animal act
to bring home the fact. the feeling.
the growls, the purrs, the fight, the flight
using our touch, our hearing, our sight
Thought’s can’t stray far
or time will float away
and what is life without time, only night and day.
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Temptress of my nightmares
You’re a temptress. You lure in me in the darkest part of the night.
It’s when my mind is most twisted that you shine so bright
You’re an asphyxiant. Taking your strong hold grasped around my throat
You take control, withholding my breath, the lifeline to my heart and soul. I gasp.
And sure, my heartbeat pays its toll, quickening and pounding, breaching the dark room.
Like a hypnotic chant that lures me to my doom. My downfall.
That’s what you will be to me. In the depth of the night.
I struggle lost at sea. There is nothing in sight.
Par the moon’s reflection and the current with no direction.
How can I escape you when you are my guide,
And when drowning alone, I cannot hide.
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The toxin of sadness
Like ink spilled onto a jotter,
or into a glass of water. It spreads slowly and seemingly at random,
clouding reality and suffocating clarity in tandem.
I thought it would pass, like a common cold, but it took hold of my skeleton
Where the depth of my coldness breathes without a sound
A hollow can be found, like breaking open a rotten fruit.
And in the space, is the unknown. The dark could hold anything
The light, the spring, the clear oasis that brought salvation
Is gone. The space breeds only starvation.
It creates an emptiness that grows.
It doesn’t stop at the edges of my bones, my skin almost groans
With the weight of the depression, I can feel it take possession.
And I let go. Let go and feel freedom without responsibility
And the emptiness prays on my susceptibility. It shall conquer all.
And I will fall.
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I lie so close, your heart beats in my ear,
it feels like you are me as your lifeline I can hear,
It doesn't tell me of the current that charges around to each bodily crevice,
This is only evident in your fingers and the warmth with which they caress,
It doesn't tell me if you are nervous or if it's all fake,
For this is proved already as the notes in your voice shake,
It doesn't tell me of how much you love me,
In your shining eyes this is plain to see
This is not an emotional tool for which I can pick at information
But the timed drum beat of your heart brings me condemnation
For believing in immortality, with your heart beat in my ear
I know to treasure what I have because the end is near
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What is Freedom?
To be a free child.
Growing up in a world that's
not as wild or full of fears
as yesteryears
When the land is our back garden
the only things to harden our bones
is the wind
You cannot sin
because you are born free.
except to be what you can be.
Because where there is no wrong,
You've to be strong
because you want to
fight hard
because that's what you do
be incredible
because thats you
but its everyone else too
and to be anything less is a sin. You've got far to go.
and you can't win.
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Where is Creativity?
Where is creativity? I found some in a friend's
lend of a cigerette
the brunette had filled it with a bit more than nicotine
like a vaccine it filled my muscles with a new life
a new strife, I took up my destiny
Now it's left my rhythm offbeat, and I have
sore feet from dancing to the bone, now I groan,
how I can't move no more, the world's
a whore for fogetting me
and I'm the one that's free
But really
I just inhaled that
one way ticket to be
and with it's soft paws
and sharp claws
it filled me
so I'd fight for it
but when I needed it most, my life on the brink
the good times were gone in a blink.
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The dance of life
Fire up the lights tonight.
Dance as if with all your might.
Sing and sway.
fight and play.
its all a game anyway.
And run, hide, escape the mass
climb the trees and smell the grass
the fire, the chase
Find love, find grace
turn and see what your heart can face
set the boundaries, break your limits
Sometimes you win and sometimes youll submit
Waste time, whats worth while
waste minutes with a private smile
but lifes too short to feel hostile
Dance with the stars,
dance with your heart,
dance with your lovers
and don't fall apart
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Patchwork people
I give up my identity
         If I can become your own
If you'l create a patchwork from you
and me,
         all stitched and sewn
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