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About Varied / Hobbyist SiscoLinkUnited States Groups :iconsisco-fans: Sisco-Fans
Cuz apparently no one cares XD
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Deviant for 9 Years
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Newest Deviations

.:Tigerstar In The Dark Forest:. by SiscoCentral1915 .:Tigerstar In The Dark Forest:. :iconsiscocentral1915:SiscoCentral1915 14 4 .:The Tool Bounded By Unraveling Chains:. by SiscoCentral1915 .:The Tool Bounded By Unraveling Chains:. :iconsiscocentral1915:SiscoCentral1915 18 4 .:Just Say The Words!:. by SiscoCentral1915 .:Just Say The Words!:. :iconsiscocentral1915:SiscoCentral1915 13 18 .:Behind Blue Eyes:. by SiscoCentral1915 .:Behind Blue Eyes:. :iconsiscocentral1915:SiscoCentral1915 22 6 .:Shu's Plan:. by SiscoCentral1915 .:Shu's Plan:. :iconsiscocentral1915:SiscoCentral1915 5 1 .:Smile-Bomb:. by SiscoCentral1915 .:Smile-Bomb:. :iconsiscocentral1915:SiscoCentral1915 6 4 .:Fury of the Flame:. by SiscoCentral1915 .:Fury of the Flame:. :iconsiscocentral1915:SiscoCentral1915 27 4 .:Alepou:. by SiscoCentral1915 .:Alepou:. :iconsiscocentral1915:SiscoCentral1915 11 3 .: A Crazy Cat Lady :. by SiscoCentral1915 .: A Crazy Cat Lady :. :iconsiscocentral1915:SiscoCentral1915 38 3 Redesigned: AV-R The Albino Porcupine by SiscoCentral1915 Redesigned: AV-R The Albino Porcupine :iconsiscocentral1915:SiscoCentral1915 29 2 .:Beneath the Rising Storm Clouds:. by SiscoCentral1915 .:Beneath the Rising Storm Clouds:. :iconsiscocentral1915:SiscoCentral1915 20 5 .:Orion's Cave:. by SiscoCentral1915 .:Orion's Cave:. :iconsiscocentral1915:SiscoCentral1915 35 1 .:Silly Cat Boy:. by SiscoCentral1915 .:Silly Cat Boy:. :iconsiscocentral1915:SiscoCentral1915 12 8 .:Of Thunder And Lightning:. by SiscoCentral1915 .:Of Thunder And Lightning:. :iconsiscocentral1915:SiscoCentral1915 19 6 Shu Nebraska (Official Artwork 1) by SiscoCentral1915 Shu Nebraska (Official Artwork 1) :iconsiscocentral1915:SiscoCentral1915 9 3 .:Pushed Buttons:. by SiscoCentral1915 .:Pushed Buttons:. :iconsiscocentral1915:SiscoCentral1915 7 4
Alright, it's finally here!!
ENJOY!! :meow:
:iconshootala1plz::iconbummy1::iconbummy2::iconbummy3::iconbummy2::iconbummy3::iconshootala3plz:

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By the power of Cold Fear's Awesomeness, I got the gallop on, FROM THIS PLANET OUT OF EXISTANCE!!! www.youtube.com/watch?v=QwKgIj… :iconicameplz:

Pride

BE YOURSELF

Made with pride by the DeviantArt community BROWSE ALL ART

Commitment: Restrictive, yet with mostly good intentions.
Why is it that I can't bother to befriend it, yet feel comfortable with Negligence and Effortlessness?
Every decision I make, every action I take, and every sound I create... 
Steers clear from Commitment's words.

The laziness that envelops me takes a hold to the point of it BEING my very being.
And yet, I write this, committed to writing a story in the form of a poem.
Yet, I take the time to eat, drink, and sleep, committed to keep living.
Yet... I do everything else other than the very thing I want to be committed to.
But "Want" is not a "Need". 
Even when I "Need" it feels empty.

I am no Commitment, but a Contradiction
Contradiction with no purpose, partnered with two others: Fear and Intimidation.
Fear loves Anxiety while Intimidation feasts on Judgement.
Judgement is imaginary, yet it fuels Intimidation as though it were real.
The possibility is real as it is imaginary.

As I sit here, questioning why I am committed to typing this, the devil that sits on my shoulder
rears it's hideous head once more, shouting the many truths of myself into my ear...

You are useless.


You whine at the first honest mistake you make.

You push people away because you don't want to be seen as a fool for taking someone's advice.

You think low of your skills the moment you make the slightest mistake in your art.

You can't even bother to work outside of your so called "comfort zone" in order to get what you want.

So why do you insist on trying? WHY are you trying?

How can you make a mark in the world if you don't put in the effort?

Don't you want to make yourself known?!

What are you so afraid of?! 

...

I am afraid of Judgement. 
Intimidation restricts me from wanting to do things out of my comfort zone.
Laziness pushes away commitment...
And the final nail in the coffin is...




I don't like being vulnerable...




I am a troubled Being r
iddled with years of mistakes
Years of miscommunication
Years of a constant struggle to ward off depression
A constant struggle to remember or DO anything
Devoid of attention whoring praise...
Brings in pity parties and yet makes fun of others for doing the same thing...

Spoken like madness mantra,
My heart screams from the abyss for freedom...
Yet, my soul pretends to feel or hear anything...
Every time my heart takes every opportunity to see the outside world, I immediately shut it out...
Just so I don't feel the reality of my own existence...
Just so I don't feel the true weight of my sadness and pain...
Just so... I don't look vulnerable.

To avoid being judged, I do nothing. I say nothing. 
That way no one can judge me.
I'll be free of judgement... yet be judged on the daily.
Judgement does not give me a pass. Not even from my own.
And as Jealousy shows my false friendship with commitment,
it begins to fester into its final, most common form...
"The Green Eyed Monster"

How does one who has never experienced the monster cope with
the horrible mistakes they've made while being possessed?
They don't...
There is no coping.
The monster's minions, Guilt and Regret, won't allow such a thing.
They feed off of my neglected, good natured sibling, Conscience
And pretend to act as though they ARE my Conscience.
I never listened for their pleas for help.

I feel like I'm letting everyone down.
I feel like I'm letting myself down.
I feel like a nuisance to everyone around me.
I feel like tearing myself apart to be free from my own negativity.
The more I age, the more aware I am of my own actions...
This hyper-awareness becomes more intense each year...
and it is painful.

... Why am I like this?
At this point, nobody believes me anymore...
I don't believe in myself, yet I continue to draw with short bursts of "commitment"...
I give up easily because it's all I've ever known.
Because there is too much effort to actually try and stay consistent.
Desperation is the only way I truly "commit"
Because I have no choice....

But why?
Why does that have to be the case?...
Even has I tear apart several pages listing all of the horrible traits I have no way of truly discarding from my DNA
They keep reviving themselves time and time again, as if to taunt me...
Do I enjoy my own self destruction?

My lover, Happiness, is rarely around.
There is always something preventing them from hugging me and making me feel better.
Their hugs are the only thing that make me feel better...
They would also tell me to visit Commitment, but I am always distracted by my own suffering.

I look around my room and it is a junkyard.
I make empty sounds that speak of cleaning it up...
Yet it only gets more and more cluttered by the day.

I am jealous of those who actually do something with themselves.
All of those people who actually tried and succeeded to pick themselves up from the brink of their own destruction...
All of those people who are close friends with Commitment and talk about it on the daily.
While I'm sitting in the dark, cluttered messes of my mind, wondering why I can't be friends with it either...

...

Because I am pathetic.
  • Listening to: *Nothing at the moment*
  • Reading: *Nothing at the moment*
  • Watching: *Nothing at the moment*
  • Playing: *Nothing at the moment*
  • Eating: *Nothing at the moment*
  • Drinking: *Nothing at the moment*

Activity


Here's a WIP of the I Can Talk Meme~!

It's a good thing I don't have animation block anymore otherwise this wouldn't have gone as far as it did
So I read :iconchiibe: ~ Chiibe's Manga / Comic, Manick and this was my reaction to the first chapter.

Haru is such a sweet bean, I love him so much, he deserves better ;3;
If you haven't read Manick, I recommend it a lot! It oddly enough gives me a 90s Manga feel that I haven't experienced since reading Trigun and Trigun Maximum o3o
tapas.io/episode/832787
Doing a livestream of animating a MAP part once again

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Add a Comment:
 
:iconterrarian-warrior:
Terrarian-Warrior Featured By Owner Jan 27, 2019
Wazzup? I like how you made realistic versions of Sonic Characters!

Are there more being made?
Reply
:iconsiscocentral1915:
SiscoCentral1915 Featured By Owner Jan 27, 2019  Hobbyist General Artist
Thanks! I'm glad you like the realistic versions of the characters :D
...
No, not really. I pretty much make the realistic versions of Sonic characters for fun
But I never really went as far as Sonic and Tails in a serious manner ^^;
Reply
:iconterrarian-warrior:
Terrarian-Warrior Featured By Owner Jan 28, 2019
You're welcome!

I didn't mean it in a serious light. I meant, well, for fun as you stated. Similar to how the realistic Sonic and Shadow refs work. If you don't want to, however, that's fine.
Reply
:iconsiscocentral1915:
SiscoCentral1915 Featured By Owner Jan 29, 2019  Hobbyist General Artist
Ah I see :'3
Thanks for telling me what you meant lol
I sometimes have people who watch me primarily for one thing (fan-art)
instead of going with the flow with everything I do via my original works n' stuff
And hell I even get requested to do something even though I don't do requests anymore

also sorry for the late reply ;w;
Reply
(1 Reply)
:iconlenatre:
Lenatre Featured By Owner Jul 6, 2018  Hobbyist Writer
Hyah!
Reply
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