sgrildrig

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Happy Vernal Equinox!

Well, we've supposedly left winter behind us.  It's spring now, believe it or not.  I celebrated by not wearing my coat, which was probably a bad choice during the morning, since it was well below freezing, but felt good in the afternoon when it was pretty warm out.

I'm not sure it's bikini weather, though.  Not that I'm prone to wearing a bikini.

There's a sliver of light on the horizon at this hour.  That's good and bad.  It's good, because I really like the longer days.  But I sorta prefer when it works its way into the morning.  I have a bad habit of crashing early.  It feels silly to sleep when it's still light out.

That's not going to stop me from crashing now, though...

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"That's the last time I let you make the travel arrangements."
"Hey, we got here, right?"
"Yeah, but with five layovers?"
"It was cheaper that way."
"We could have driven here faster."
"Sure, but this way we got free drinks and pretzels."
"But no luggage."
"It'll show up eventually."
"Whatever.  Where's the rental car?"
"I didn't get one."
"What?  How the hell are we getting to the place?"
"I'm calling for an uberuber."
"You mean an uber."
"No, an uberuber."
"What the hell is a...OH MY GOD!"
"Hey, she's arrived.  That was quick."
"Run!"
"Don't do that, she'll have to chase you."
"What the hell were you thinking!?"
"Shhh, she's doing this to make some money."
"GET ON MY HAND OR ELSE."
"Come on!"
"What's the 'or else?'"
"Don't ask questions you don't want the answer to."
"Fine."
"WHERE TO?"
"The downtown Basingstoke Hotel, please."
"OKAY."
"Shouldn't she be watching where she's walking?"
"Just let her do her job."
"LISTEN TO YOUR LITTLE FRIEND."
"Right.  Okay.  I'll be quiet now."

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"Aha, I've found your stash!"
"Wait, what are you going to do?"
"I'm going to drink the growth potion!"
"You can't do that!"
"Try and stop me!  Uhhhh..."
"What?"
"Which one of these is the growth potion?"
"They all are."
"Seriously?"
"Yeah.  I go a bit nuts when making them."
"Fine.  I'll take this one!" glug glug P'TOOOIE!
"Hey, stop spitting my potion out."
"What the hell flavor was that?"
"The green one?  Kale."
"I thought it was going to be lime or mint."
"No, it's kale."
"That's stupid."
"Hey, make your own damned potions."
"What's this yellow one?"
"Spaghetti squash."
"Ew.  The red one?"
"Beets."
"Are these all veggie flavors?"
"Hell no.  What do you take me for?"
"Ask me again when I'm colossal.  What's this one?"
"Black licorice."
"You're evil."
"I like those flavors!"
"Is there any orange or cherry, how about apple?"
"Nope, nope and nope."
"What's this one?"
"Uhhh, tuna flavor."
"I hate you."
"So are you going to leave my potions alone now?"
"Not a chance.  I'm gonna find one I can keep down."
"Stop disparaging my stuff."
"What's this purple one?"
"Eggplant."
"Fuck you." glug glug glug glug "That's vile!"
"Go raid somebody else's stuff next time."
"How long does this crap take to work?"
"Two or three days."
"Oh my god.  You're the worst."

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<randomrant>

I've been convinced to watch HarmonQuest.  Golly, that takes me back, though I don't think any of the groups I joined were as focused or organized as they are.

My first character was a half-orc named Duh.  He had lots of strength, lots of constitution, and pretty much nothing else.  His first melee involved having a thrown knife embedded in his chest.  He was so happy to finally have a weapon.

I did some DM'ing too.  That was weird.  I'm not really made for herding people around, but somehow I muddled through.  The math drove me crazy too.  Fortunately none of us were all that concerned about the strict letter of the rules.

I've pondered more than once what it would be like to rp in that style.  Imagine the look on a giantess's face when she grabs a tiny person, only to have them to get a really excellent saving throw that allows them to squirm free.

I have to believe that would be really frustrating.  Anywho, that's my thought for the night.  As you can probably tell I'm running out of energy.  Time to crash...

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An omni idea:  five places for a giantess first date

Romantic Dinner
I've pitch the dinner downtown thing before.  How about something different, like a nighttime tryst by the escarpment next to a waterfall?  Instead of a candle, a cheery bonfire.  Some soft background music coming from the car.  She sitting next to the cliff with one arm resting upon it, and you sitting close to the edge with the fire crackling behind you.  A fondue seems appropriate, something she can dip morsels into.  Make sure it's not too hot in case you end up being used as a dipping stick.

Drive-in Movie
The problem is that there aren't many of these left.  However you're likely to find that's not a problem for her as she cheerfully removes the roof from the local theater.  It's a good idea to warn the staff so that they can have enough popcorn ready.  Be careful what movie you offer to see with her.  Godzilla: King of the Monsters might be a risky choice.

Visit the Site of Her First Rampage
It's a chance to get to know her.  Find out what she likes.  And try to judge what your chances of survival will be if she ever gets pissed off at you.  Pay special attention to whether she's more interested in flattening buildings or squishing people.  See if she's spared any particular locations, like churches.  Be sure to compliment her destructive tendencies.

Growth Date
If she likes to spend some time slumming around at mundane heights you may have an opportunity to witness what she's like as she grows increasingly gigantic.  If she enjoys a bit of gentle fun invite her out on a hike, or a visit to some remote wooded area.  If she suggests demonstrating her ability at some downtown locale you might want to check out any previous rampage places as indicated above.  Make damn sure you call her the day after.

Wine Tasting Tour
Just be sure to avoid this idea during grape stomping season.  No sense in giving her any ideas.  Also, it's probably best not to visit too many places.  A drunken giantess may be adorable, but the phrase "taking your life into your own hands" springs to mind.  Only it won't be your hands your life is in.

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