Published: January 26, 2011
Hello. Long time no see, I guess.
I'm here to apologize for not being able to answer all your messages and comments. I'm really, really sorry. But I want to thank you for your support and your good wishes for this year, too. Thank you so much!
I've been having a rough time since a few months ago. I'm actually facing a huge emotional crisis right now, and I don't know when I will be able to submit something decent. I think any romance related pics will be out of my gallery for a while.
I lost something very important to me, so I'm sad. Well... not actually sad, but I think I have been completely destroyed by this. It's like when someone you love dies, and you can't do anything about it. Your only option is to start grieving their death, or cry your eyes out until you can't shed another freaking tear.
I don't usually follow advices telling me not to cry over someone who doesn't deserve my tears. Hell, if I did, I think I would feel like a sensor bomb. Touch me and I'll explode right in your face. If you feel like crying, then cry. Cry everything you want, even if the reason of your tears is insignificant or meaningless. It's not good to hold it in. Besides, who cares? It's your pain, and you'll get over it, eventually, but you will.
I know crying won't solve anything, but at least it helps you release all your inner pain. It kinda helps you feel better in a way by just letting your emotions flow freely in the form of tears. Now, crying in front of the one who caused your pain is another thing. I personally think we don't have to let them get what they want, but it also depends on the situation. That's just my opinion.
The one I lost is not actually dead (at least not physically), but to me, he now is, and even though I say this, I feel like crap right now. I don't know if I can shed another tear. I think I spent like four straight hours crying over this, and I kinda feel a little better.
Such way to start a new year, huh? But hopefully I'll get over it... sooner or later, but I know I will. Sorry if I sounded like a wimp, I just had the need to vent out my feelings. I'm not usually like this, and I don't like to feel like this. I have to stay and be strong.
Before I go, I want to leave a message for you:
"Don't ever let your heart fall into careless hands. If you do, you'll regret it later."
Just like me.