Shop Forum More Submit  Join Login
Nothing Personal Assistants by schizmatic Nothing Personal Assistants by schizmatic
This is why I can only respect an artificial intelligence that's actually smart enough to make fun of me -- as I smash it into a million pieces in mindless primate rage.

Image: schemantics.com/files/nothing_… Page: schemantics.com/comics/1043

Schemantics: A Webcomic Of Intelligent Weirdness - Store - Archive
     Like on Facebook, Follow on Twitter
Add a Comment:
 
:iconintegratethesurface:
IntegrateTheSurface Featured By Owner May 20, 2017
Haha. Those assistants would be out of a job! I don't need crappy electronics telling me how to run my life. They're not my parents.
Reply
:iconelectricgecko:
ElectricGecko Featured By Owner Jan 31, 2017
Hey!  Pizza for breakfast is the breakfast of kings!
Reply
:iconjohn-martin:
John-Martin Featured By Owner Jan 9, 2017  Hobbyist General Artist
That's something they need to develop an app for: smashing online gadgets.
Reply
:iconschizmatic:
schizmatic Featured By Owner Jan 9, 2017  Professional General Artist
And the smashed gadgets should include your phone when you've installed too many apps for your own good.
Reply
:iconjohn-martin:
John-Martin Featured By Owner Jan 10, 2017  Hobbyist General Artist
The app to end all apps ...
Reply
:iconboesemani:
BOESEMANI Featured By Owner Jan 8, 2017
Is it bad that I read this while eating breakfast...
and breakfast was pizza?
Reply
:iconschizmatic:
schizmatic Featured By Owner Jan 8, 2017  Professional General Artist
So long as you also have a dozen deep-fried donuts and a pound of sugar water with your breakfast pizza, you're good.
Reply
:iconboesemani:
BOESEMANI Featured By Owner Jan 9, 2017
The smart-ass appliances will be all over it, though.
Reply
:iconmrtenso:
MrTenso Featured By Owner Edited Jan 7, 2017
The thing I fear is something like that:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=LRq_SA…
Reply
:iconschizmatic:
schizmatic Featured By Owner Jan 7, 2017  Professional General Artist
My greatest fear is that the entire enterprise of human technology is a "major wobbly."
Reply
:iconquantuminnovator:
QuantumInnovator Featured By Owner Jan 6, 2017
Artificial intelligence has gone too far when it's starts criticizing your food preferences.

Microwaves could become more technologically sophisticated. If you can give your cell phone a custom ringtone, you should be able to customize the sound your microwave makes when your food is ready. There is one Selena Gomez song that would be the perfect song for when the microwave is done, with these lyrics: "When you're ready, come and get it...."

Maybe microwaves could also feature integrated spectrometers, so that you could program specific power and time settings for foods with specific spectrometric profiles. It would save time, and encourage people to come up with their own recipes.
Reply
:iconschizmatic:
schizmatic Featured By Owner Jan 6, 2017  Professional General Artist
And if your food's overcooking, the microwave could play "Burning Up." Or worst-case scenario, "Burning Down the House."
Reply
:icongoeliath:
goeliath Featured By Owner Jan 6, 2017  Hobbyist Digital Artist
but pizza is good though...
Reply
:iconschizmatic:
schizmatic Featured By Owner Jan 6, 2017  Professional General Artist
Like pizza and vodka is really any worse for breakfast than Krispy Kreme and Starbucks.
Reply
:icongoeliath:
goeliath Featured By Owner Jan 6, 2017  Hobbyist Digital Artist
EXACTLY!!
Reply
:iconel-fracasor:
El-Fracasor Featured By Owner Jan 6, 2017  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
You'll never feel completely alone at home with your food appliances yapping about your habits :D
Reply
:iconschizmatic:
schizmatic Featured By Owner Jan 6, 2017  Professional General Artist
I'd just pretend my appliances were haunted so instead of being annoying robots, they'd be like magical ghosts. X)
Reply
:iconel-fracasor:
El-Fracasor Featured By Owner Jan 6, 2017  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Fine, just keep pretending that until one day, one of those smart guys will give you a heart attack during an inappropriate time in the toilet :faint:
Reply
:iconschizmatic:
schizmatic Featured By Owner Jan 6, 2017  Professional General Artist
Ha, that ghost would literally scare the living sh*t out of me. X}
Reply
:iconcatsupeye:
catsupeye Featured By Owner Jan 6, 2017
the stupid people need the smart things jaja!!   Stupid Me!  OHMIHGOSHITSUGLYBOORGAH 
Reply
:iconschizmatic:
schizmatic Featured By Owner Jan 6, 2017  Professional General Artist
That would explain the widespread use of smartphones. X)
Reply
:iconcatsupeye:
catsupeye Featured By Owner Jan 6, 2017
heyyyyyyy!!  jajaja!  Iphone maniac emoticon 
Reply
Add a Comment:
 
×
  • Art Print
  • Canvas
  • Photo
  • Art Gifts
Download JPG 562 × 433




Details

Submitted on
January 6, 2017
Image Size
111 KB
Resolution
562×433
Link
Thumb

Stats

Views
268
Favourites
14 (who?)
Comments
22
Downloads
1

License

Creative Commons License
Some rights reserved. This work is licensed under a
Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-Share Alike 3.0 License.
×