The Stephen King Drinking Game (We All Float!)

2 min read

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sbkMulletMan's avatar
:iconwutplz:… :iconballoonseesplz:

I have now actually done this.

:iconspidersplz::iconsaysplz:Oh, Good GOD Man, that's been known to KILL people!
1 Shot for the story taking place in Maine (might as well just take this one as the DVD is loading up)
1 Shot for the Monster's origins never being explained (at least in the movies)
1 Shot for the 1-Dimensional Bully with no redeeming values
1 Shot for the same Bully characters seeing Violence & Murder as the only answer
1 Shot for Rednecks
1 Shot for Abusive Assholes
1 Shot for Alcoholics (sadly, the last 3 are often separate, even if they're all rolled into one)
1 Shot for a disappointing or anti-climactic payoff at the end (A SPIDER?!)
1 Shot for the bland or disappointing ending (so his wife's fine. Whoopdeedoo)

And I even took the liberty to throw in my own shots.

1 Shot for "The Magic Negro" (King may have invented this one and it sure gave Morgan Freeman a Career)
1 Shot for the knitted friendships formed by the protagonists
1 Shot if the story ties in to The Dark Tower series (A Toast to The Turtle!)
1 Shot for something that's supposed to be scary, but just ends up stupid or funny (the dog)
1 Shot for a Crappy, Unfaithful or Disappointing Television rendition of an otherwise good King story (I think only 3 films may be exempt from this rule, and IT isn't one of them, even if it is fun!)
2 Shots "Just for the Hell of It" during the beloved Library Scene (WA-HA!)
And 1 final shot just in case we may have forgotten anything!  

Thankfully, this movie was so long, I had time to recover in between shots, especially later in the movie, so I only really got half-drunk.

And compared to how I was a year ago, that's one hell of an improvement!  This time, I was laughing my ass off and having fun!

...why are you all spinning?
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you all forgot to mention take one shot for the child who's psychic for reasons that are never explained