Dead in the middle of the night seemed a good time to update my situation for some reason, so for those still curious, here's the relatively good news:
The good news: that hunch I had? CONFIRMED. There's no surefire way to tell that it's the 100% cause, but based on the doctor's immediate observations, there's an incredibly high chance that if I get this fixed, I won't be in pain much longer. The bad news: ssssssurgery. I've gone under before, but that was for my teeth. Since I'll be bedbound for a while, I'm opting to do it after graduation from college. I'm asked whether I want to go to grad school or go into working after this semester, but believe me, it's really hard to see a day into the future when you feel like I do! I think I'll ride the wave of post-surgical good feeling straight to a gym membership or something when I'm able, haha.
I'm going to be inactive since the thesis deadline is creeping up on me blisteringly fast and I'm freaking out about it a little bit...I feel like I'm never going to get this thing finished. Can I finish writing and illustrating a book in literally a month??? One that requires research and an accompanying paper? I hope so, I have to.
As for a Raiden update, he's totally lost any lethargy. You walk up the stairs to his terrarium and he chases after you inside of it because he wants to be tong-fed crickets. His sight isn't very good, but he's having a great time being a lizard like he should. Good geck. Steals spinach. Will bite anything that resembles a spinach. Spinach. Why do you like stealing your insects' feeder food, you noodly nerd.
UPDATE not for me but for lil' Raiden: Raiden's eye blockage was removed (it was....disturbingly large) and he's on a bunch of medications now to see if he can regain his vision. His cornea is damaged, but his eye seems like it MIGHT still be viable if the little guy goes through a rigorous route to recovery. He's doped out in his terrarium, which is going to have to get another overhaul. It feels bad to have done care off of misinformation, but you wouldn't believe how pervasive bad care tips are throughout the reptile community. Raiden also got officially sexed (male and female geckos have different care in some regards, and it's hard to tell the difference) and the result was.....they have no idea. Maybe Raiden's hermaphroditic?
Either way the recovery for the little guy is gonna be a little bumpy (read: take home shots), but the worst is over, so we can finally have very directed care and a healthy lizard. Still no news to report about myself other than my back's still killing me.
I was waiting until I had some answers to write this, but tbh, despite being on the runaround for a very long time, I still have nothing.A little more than a year ago
I decided I was going to lose some weight, so I walked around everywhere I could, but I took a tumble straight into rough concrete and had to wrap my knees in gauze to shield the public. I'd been doing a fair job up to that point, but this directly or indirectly brought on a super debilitating wave of misery that's had me in and out of doctors ever since. First it was leg pain, which was understandable, because I had to drag the leg for so long. I went to chiropractic and eventually physical therapy. By this time, my back had also gotten godawful, so physical therapy went above and beyond to try to address it. The leg got better. My back got so painful that I could barely leave the house for a few hours at a time.
I just got an MRI done and read my results. One hundred percent normal. No severe issues. No skeletal or muscular or nervous problems. I should be in flawless health, essentially. But regardless, I'm in soul-shattering pain almost as soon as I wake up, and it gets worse the longer the day goes. I constantly fidget and make frantic motions to relieve the pain that have left me ashamed to go into public.
I know I'm a little stunted, to say the least, but given that there is no reason for this to exist, I'm out of answers. I think everyone around me is either convinced I'm lying or that this isn't as bad as it is. I don't know what's worse, being told there's nothing wrong when there absolutely is, or being told that you're overexaggerating and lazy. I WAS WALKING FOR FUN BEFORE ALL THIS HAPPENED. I was doing well. Now I can't even unload my own dishwasher and I'm at the near-end of college so I'll have to be out on my own insurance with no proven inability to perform tasks and in the competitive job market (and considering that healthcare was changed again overnight, apparently, I'm worse off than I thought I was!)
All this garbage and I still have to be at a vet's tomorrow to take my lizard in for a possible surgical appointment to save his vision, since the little dude's aging, fighting medication, and freaked out while shedding and hurt himself. If that wasn't emotionally torturous enough, I've got to be in a car for hours on top of hours for the next few days to get there and back and to and fro, which is going to put me in physical pain again where I can't have medication support (it has a dizzying, weakening side effect). This won't stop. I'm just glad I don't have classes I have to leave the house for this semester, but what I do have is a supermassive graduation project.TL;DR
I'm an adult with an unexplained debilitating medical condition that's about to become independent from family healthcare (when getting healthcare is probably going to be as easy skiing through tar) and a pet I'm very attached to is probably going to be operated on tomorrow.
I wish that something was visibly wrong because AT LEAST I'D HAVE A TREATMENT PLAN, Y'KNOW. One can only suffer so much before their mind gets numbed.
EDIT: It's been asked and I have figured I might have one more option left. I'm from a family tree that has two sides of it turning out really short. On one of those family groups, there has been an operation to reduce back pain. She was elderly when this was performed, but I think we might have the same problem of being overgrown/developed for our body frame. I've always felt like my body tried to be taller but could never grow the extra few inches it needed. if this doesn't pan out I'm looking like I'm out of options :/ I felt like a titan when I crested above 4'11".