Rest in the House of Your Husband

The Shocking Message



These weekly devotionals I will be posting come from and are copyright to Pam Iannello, my pastor's late wife who went home to be with the Lord on June 18, 2008. They were written by a Godly lady for other ladies young and old so that their walk with the Lord may be strengthened.

Used with permission from New Beginnings Baptist Church.




This devotion is part of the "Tying the Marriage Knot Tighter" series.

A marriage seminar hosted for us by Adam and Eve!


I'm going to share with you today some of the lesson and a little bit more of what I taught during our ladies Bible study hour one Sunday. What prompted me to pursue this topic was an interesting discussion in which a few women were engaged. I was asked whether or not I would ever want to remarry if my husband were to die. This is certainly a thought provoking question and a heart stirring consideration for any wife, amen? I know women who would respond to such a question with an emphatic, "NO WAY!" And I know women who would heartily respond, "Yes, most definitely!" What about you, dear wife? What would your response be? There is certainly a contrast between the two given answers… Now I know you might think this to be a rather morbid topic, but what I want to get at is the heart of the answer you would give. In order to do that, let's turn to the book of Ruth and begin by reading the story of Naomi, Ruth and Orpah who all lost their husbands…

Ruth 1:3-5 (KJV)
And Elimelech Naomi's husband died; and she was left, and her two sons. And they took them wives of the women of Moab; the name of the one was Orpah, and the name of the other Ruth: and they dwelled there about ten years. And Mahlon and Chilion died also both of them; and the woman was left of her two sons and her husband.

Now let's skip on down to verses 8 - 9a which say:

And Naomi said unto her two daughter's in law, Go, return each to her mother's house: the Lord deal kindly with you, as ye have dealt with the dead, and with me. The Lord grant you that ye may find rest, each of you in the house of her husband…"

The last part of that verse really stood out to me - perhaps you noticed it too?

"….that ye may find rest in the house of your husband…."

Hmmm, I wonder how many women today who have husbands that are ALIVE can actually say they have found rest in his house, can honestly claim they have found peace of mind and heart in being married! Is marriage the place of total fulfillment for you dear lady, or the place of total turmoil?? Is it really possible to say that we have found rest in the house of our husbands? If I were to visit you today, would I find tranquility present in your soul, linked to your love for being married, or would I find unrest in your soul, linked to your dislike of being married?

Ladies, when death comes into a family like it did in our story today, it ought to reform what is amiss there! Take a good hard look at your attitude toward marriage at this point in time, toward being a wife, and toward your husband… Would it have to take the death of your marriage to reform your attitude toward it altogether?? Would you say the rest, which Naomi referred to, is solely dependent upon the man to whom you are married?? Do you believe changing husbands would truly "patch up" any inner turmoil you might be experiencing?

Psalm 55:6 (KJV)
And I said, Oh that I had wings like a dove! for then would I fly away, and be at rest.

We are appraising Naomi's wishes for her daughter's in law, but what does her wish reveal to us about Ruth and Orpah's character as wives? Obviously they were good wives, and they were women that found joy in being married, for she encouraged them to remarry. I want you to take note of the fact that Naomi is cheering these widows on at a point when Ruth and Orpah had not as yet found new husbands, so this encouragement of hers has nothing to do with particular men at all! Instead, we see that it has everything to do with them! My point being, they took personal responsibility to see to it they were happily married. Naomi testifies to us in scripture that Ruth and Orpah had both been kind to her now dead sons, and yes ladies, kind even to their mother-in-law! When you truly love your husband, as you should, you will treat his family kindly and with the proper respect. Hence, Naomi's desire was that the Lord would treat these women as well as they had treated their husbands, her sons, and even her.

Let's park there for a moment and think about that point. How well would you be treated by the Lord if He treated you exactly as you have dealt with your husband? Can you honestly say today that you are kind to the man you married? Is there kindness upon your tongue when you speak to him? I would venture to say that your dealings toward your husband would most likely reveal the heart of the answer you gave concerning remarriage! Wives that deal with their husbands kindly and have found rest in the house of their husbands are the ones that usually desire to remarry. And those that don't deal with their husbands kindly are the ones that wouldn't remarry if you paid them! What does that then tell us about being a wife? It tells us that the secret to the joy we find in being married lies WITHIN our hearts, not outside of them!

Psalm 132:14 (KJV)
This is my rest for ever: here will I dwell; for I have desired it.

Ladies, as Christian wives, each of us should desire to come to the place where we can truly say we have found REST in the house of our husbands - rest in the presence of an imperfect man and freedom from marital anxiety! Anybody today interested in the challenge, interested in the commitment that is going to be necessary? Are you truly willing to take responsibility for all your marital attitudes? Has the time come for you to make up your mind once and for all to find your rest in your husband's house? Better guard your heart then, for out of it comes the issue of being a good wife; out of your heart will come the kind dealings toward your husband in spite of the type of man he is - or isn't; out of your heart comes the issue of loving married life…

Proverbs 4:23
Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life.

Keeping your heart is going to keep your marriage - do you realize that, dear lady? Keeping your heart is going to preserve a healthy attitude toward your husband and allow you to deal kindly with him. Keeping your heart is going to stay your focus on the Lord and His character, not on man's imperfections. Keep your heart how? With all diligence! Not once in awhile when you happen to remember, not just if your husband keeps his heart, not only if you have time to keep it, not only if you feel like keeping it - but with ALL DILIGENCE!

Matthew 11:28-29 (KJV)
Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. [29] Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls.

Ladies, see to the safeguarding of your heart continually. If you don't, you'll find no rest in your husband's house, or anyone else's for that matter! God beckons all distressed, discouraged, disillusioned, disappointed, distracted, and discontented wives to cast their cares upon Him and take His yoke upon them instead. The Lord's burdens are lighter and safer for our hearts, affording us the prospect of finding rest in our current circumstances. Naomi's prayer was that the Lord would grant her daughters-in-law a life of continued marital happiness. Don't you want the same? All of us need to realize that the Lord won't grant our longings for a marriage free of all anxieties if we are apathetic about the condition and content of our hearts. Do you need to add or subtract something from your heart today, dear wife? Add kindness? Subtract bitterness? Perhaps you need to do both…

Ephes. 4:32 (KJV)
And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you.

We'll continue looking at the topic of marriage in our next lesson, but while it is called today, search your heart won't you? See if you find any rest there; see if contentment in regard to your marriage dwells within your heart. And if it does not, diligently seek to do that which is right, for there is a rest that Christ would deposit to your soul and to your home!

God Bless,
Pam
Isaiah 60:1&2
Copyright 2000 Pamela A. Iannello
Revised 2003 Meet Ms. Pam

Other Rise and Shine Devotionals
New Beginnings Baptist Church Website