Yikes, it's been ages since I've checked this account.
I remember popping in here and there, but only to move all my pieces to storage.
Anyway, I'm moving accounts.
I've had this one since 2011, when I'd just turned 18, and while it's served me well and has some great pieces, somehow it feels there's a lot of baggage as well. I've been through a lot the past several years and going back through my archives here only reminds me of everything. Also I can't afford to upgrade to a core account to change my name and all that stuff.
While I'm glad I'm past it all and have moved on, I don't want to be actively reminded about things each time I log in. Journal entries especially induce vivid memories of a version of myself I can't stand, looking back. I was so whiny and needy and desperate for attention, and even though I still act like that sometimes I've matured a lot and know I can handle things infinitely better than I could before.
Everything that happened is still part of my past, part of me, but I don't want to dwell on anything anymore. I've grown, as both a person and an artist, and I want that to be reflected in my online presence. I don't want to be seen as a whiny, sniveling little kid.
I'm turning my eyes towards the future, and that means letting some things go.
I am going to leave things as they are, in a way this profile will be like a time capsule. I've set up a new account and will be fleshing it out in the coming days, but I still wanted to preserve all this. I remember as a kid I'd burn old art and notebooks in the fireplace, like somehow having older, crappier art was a Bad Thing I needed to hide from everyone because you could only have "good art". I wanted to purge this account of everything, a more symbolic burning of old work, but decided against it. Having proof that you've grown in however many ways isn't a bad thing, being able to look back and seeing yourself change as you go through life isn't something to be ashamed of or hide from anyone. I'd much rather be able to say "Hey, I was an awful person, but I've grown up and I'm not that person anymore. I'm working to be better" than just continue with shitty behavior and make excuses for being a terrible person.
I've started a new path in life this year, I've been slowly making waves in my life and the lives of people around me, and I want to continue bettering myself. I'm 25 now and I don't want to be considered the same child I was when I first made this account. My art has picked up a lot the past few years. I'm taking more commissions for a wider variety of work than I ever expected, my skills have improved so, so much, and I've in essence begun making a career out of freelancing. So many things have changed since I last used this site so I feel a fresh start on a new account is the next best step. I've done so much and come so far since the soon-to-be high school graduate made her first post.
I'm starting a new chapter in my life, it's never a bad thing to start with a fresh canvas.
New account is here: kelverse any new updates will be posted there.