rinaz

For the sake of non redundancy ... I've changed my journal to rinaz.net

Thats all

I know I should update my journal ... I mean, the last time I added in an entry here was april ... I really dont know what to type in here cept maybe I'll just update a little bit on the entry "things I want to do before"

Currently I'm learning how to ride a bike. I guess it was pretty impulsive of me to just go ahead and register for it but I did it And right now I'm on my practical lessons already. It  was kind of nerve wrecking when I had to ride it on the circuit with other learners (motorcycles and cars at the same time) And the first time I got flabbergasted and forgotten to brake to slow down while going round the bends and when a vehicle in front of you suddenly decelerates. I was so upset that I was about to burst into tears because I was so terrified. At that point I thought I was going to get into an accident for sure.

Now I'm not so scared that much - I think practise does make one more confident. And I've a dream bike I hope to get. Vespa GT200 Sooo pretty, I hope that the parts arent all that different from the one that I'm learning right now.

Anyways, I think I'll just stop here for a bit - because again, I really dont know what to type anymore ... maybe I'll continue with this journal later in the night time

Some dreams are nice to dream. But sometimes to achieve a dream ... one have to wake up ... I'm still dreaming

My List

1. Travel to france
2. Learn how to ride a bike and owning one
3. Live overseas for a little bit
4. Become a travel show host (like the travellers)
5. Join a talent contest and sing .. sing .. sing
6. Write a book
7. Learn another language
8. Make a short clip movie
9. Set up a make over francise
10. Learn a musical instrument

Well, intangible or no, this is my (incomplete) list with some of the things I would love to do (and some of the things that would only happen in my dreams)

So what's *your* list?

Her obsession ended as quickly as the rain ... She looked outside of her window as the last drop of rain trickle their last dance upon the glass.

"How could this be?" She wondered to herself. "That a feeling so consuming, like fire,  would suddenly be extinguised ... just like that?" In alarm she wondered "what if love was like that, you wake up to the person next to you, the person you swore to love your entire life, and suddenly you find out that you dont love him anymore"

What next?

Dont mess with the bochup baby!!!

Okay, with that out of my chest, just maybe a few things from me (by the way, bochup means, couldnt care less, heck care, I suppose the literal meaning would be, carefree baby)

Its the one week holidays over here for government schools, I could always go back to work I suppose and do a little (or maybe alot of) paper work and admin or I could go do a photoshoot somewhere (finally gotten my camera back hooray!! and its about time!!) - I miss roaming around aimlessly and getting lost. I've always wonderered about how lovely it would be to have a shot along bugis, there's always a charming feel about the place that appeals to me. A mix of 70's nostalgia that hangs about there when ever I walk around the area. Or maybe the botanical gardens, its been years since I been to that place, I wonder how it looks like now ... the only distinct thing about the botanical gardens that I can remember is that there were some swans in the lake and that there were always people whom would feed these swans.

Or I can always jog again ... I havent done that for AGES! Gawsh ... I *used* to love running, its just the sense of adrenaline that rushes through you when youre running, its kind of hard to describe, best I can compare it is to fire that dances inside ... But ... now that I'm truely out of shape, I would have to hang my jock-of-the-year trophy down

<rant mode on>

I've always been a person who tries to be a logical person, and up till nowadays, I guess I have been a fairly rational person (well I hope I have)

Not gonna be one of those ladies that over analyse and over rationalise and lose sleep over things over trying to figure out things. But I guess its inevitable for females to behave like that once they have the trigger button for it, I suppose. As sure as the rain will fall, the sun will shine and women having premenstrual syndrome ...

Anyways, I noticed that to my horror, I'm becoming to be like one of those over analytical ladies that tends to analyse each and every behaviour of something ... not that rationalising is bad, but when one over reads the lines, thats something kind of obsessive, I think.

Lets just look at this scenario : (not that I'm in this scenario, but, you know what I mean)

man : we've been together for 3 months now ...

woman thinking : uh oh ... he thinks we've been together for too long ... I think he's gonna break up with me, why is this talk going on now?? Is it something I said? I dont look good enough? I know I've been bingeing lately .. does it show? 3 months? Is he bored of me? Why is he doing this to me? Did he meet someone new? I knew it .. that bustard! He's breaking up with me .. He's actually breaking up with me ... AFTER all that I DID for him!!!
woman screaming : I HATE YOU!!!

man : what did I do???

Scary and neurotic, isnt it? Please please pleaaaasee dont let me turn into an 'Ally Mcbeal' type.

The reason why I am comparing this, is because I think I might have a hint of neurosis thats coming up on me ... I cant believe I actually felt a tinge of jealousy when this dudette was talking to my crush and I have never had that before ... not normal I think ... so I think I'll just chill out for abit ..

BOCHUP!!!!!!

<insert another rant>

I am trying my best to stop eating fast food for about a month or so ... hehehe .. after the horrible  experience on saturday ... well, lets just say that I wasnt feeling so well I realised that maybe eating out constantly everyday for the past weeks could be something to do with it ...

Have you ever watched the docu-drame of about this person who ate nothing else but macD's for 30 days? It was in the sundance (if I am not wrong) called "super size me" I cant wait for to see it here, but I doubt that these kind of shows would ever reach singapore shores any time soon (show's which doesnt bring in big buxks hardly do anyways)

BOCHUP!!!!!

Well, I'll just end right now ... so .. yeah ... BOCHUP!!!!!