Long story short, I made it.
Long story long?
1. Everything goes as I said it would, including Lou and Ma's Convenience Hut, the dead rodent (two of them, actually), etc., with the exception of finding the dessicated corpse of a deer/forest ranger/superfluous family member.
2. I hiked. There's not much to do in the mountains, but there is a great deal of trail. So I walked to the top of the mountain two or three times ("top" being defined as a high-elevation area with good phone reception).
3. My mom bought a laptop on the way there (long story), and it had...chess. Spent a few hours losing against the computer. Cheating bastard.
4. Old people.
5. Jonathan Strange and Mr. Norrell. *Swoons.*
6. I scaled some awesomely huge rocks; nearly lost a hand (exaggeration alert!) plunging back to the bottom.
7. I became one with nature, by which I mean I got covered in moss and mud and ended up bathing in a river.
So generally, not that bad. I'm still glad to be back, though.