The Shrink Knows Best

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Literature Text

"The Shrink Knows Best"


A tall white guy walks into the office of a social service shrink. The shrink is sitting into his large leather chair, turning his back to the door and the man. The shrink will keep this pose, always stay calm, and never look at the man for the whole duration of the sketch.

MAN: Hi! My name is...

SHRINK: You're a black man who's angry at society for predjudices against you, but you're just using this as an excuse to hide your own shortcomings. It makes them more bearable.

MAN: Huh?

SHRINK: I know that I'm not telling you what you want to hear and that it will no doubt make you angry. But it's not my problem.  It's yours, and it's one you'll have to deal with.

MAN: Er... Ok, I don't know what you're talking about but first thing, I'm not black.

SHRINK: Who are you trying to convince here? Me... or yourself?

MAN: Just look at me and you'll see.

SHRINK: What I see is a man who refuses to aknowledge facts.

MAN: Huh? What facts?

SHRINK: See? Just like I'm saying.

MAN: Look, I don't know what your problem is, but I came here to...

SHRINK: Yes, everyone has problems but you, right? Isn't that always what you've been telling yourself? It's not you having problems with people, it's people having problems with the fact that you're black. Of course, as long as you'll be hiding behind that, you won't have to work on your real problems.

MAN: I am NOT black!

SHRINK: Methinks you protest too much. Fact is: The truth hurts! So the more you're in denial, the more you prove it.

MAN: I'm not in denial!


MAN: *facepalm*

SHRINK: I understand your chosing to be in denial. Few are those who have enough strenght of character to face their demons, and fewer still are those willing to work on them.

MAN: Will you listen to me for a...

SHRINK: Oh, I'm listening, but all I hear is you saying me-me-me. "Look at ME!" "Listen to ME!" "MY name is...!" But what about your kids? I'm not hearing you talk about them. They should be what's important for you.

MAN: What kids? I don't even ha...

SHRINK: You think that by doing as if they weren't there, that'll solve the problems you cause them? Only you can undergo therapy to make their lives better. Because if you don't do it, who will? The real question is: Are you ready to do it for them?

MAN: What are you talking about?

SHRINK: That's something you know way better than I do. So why don't you tell me? Are you afraid?

MAN: This is crazy!

SHRINK: Yes, of course. As usual, Everyone is crazy but you, and you're the only sane person in the world. Same old, same old.

MAN: Now wait a minute...

SHRINK: See? Didn't I tell you you'll get angry because I'll tell you things you don't want to hear? Well, guess what? My job is to help you, and I'm sorry but stroking your ego is not part of it.

MAN: That's it! I'm outta here!

SHRINK: That's your answer for everything, isn't it? Ok then, go ahead. Take the easy way out again and flee from your problem just like you always do, instead of facing it like an adult. It's easier for you, isn't it?

The man exits the office and slams the door.  The shrink turn his head to face the public.

SHRINK: *sigh* No matter how hard you try, you just cannot help those who dont want to help themselves.
Inspired by many social service workers I had the misfortune to be confronted with.
© 2009 - 2021 requin
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