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mike and I have taco night every so often, and the time before last, he wasn't paying attention to what he was grabbing when shopping for taco stuff. he simply grabbed whatever pack of flour tortillas that was on sale.


that is WAY too much for only two people to eat, and I knew I'd get sick of making soft tacos or burritos just trying to finish the entire package. I told mike to help me eat them, but he's a picky eater, so not much could be done. I, however, desperately tried creative ways to use these tortillas because I did not want to waste them. here are the things I tried and their result.

- peanut butter and jelly burrito: not horrible, but it is a LOT of penut butter and jelly compared to a sandwich. might be better if I used much less. also, very messy and sticky. I decided it was a nope.

- the poor man's crepe: putting frozen fruit inside microwave tortilla... again, not gross, but not worth making again unless I actually took the time to like... fry the tortilla in cinnamon or something.

- omelet-like tortilla with cheese, tomatoes, and mushrooms: BEST. THING. EVER. even if it's microwaved. so, instead of wrapping the ingredients in a sheet of prepared egg, you use a tortilla. put cheese inside, dice some cherry tomatoes, slice some mushrooms, close the tortilla, and microwave. I was SHOCKED at how amazing it was.

- tortilla pizza: both mike and I tried this one, and we both were really shocked at how good it actually is. you do it in the oven, though, so in order to make them, I need mike's help... you have no idea how afraid I am of hot things.

- chocolate pudding tortilla wrap: not disappointing! definitely better then the poor man's crepe (the crap, as Michael calls it) or the peanut butter and jelly burrito. I wonder how it'd taste with butterscotch pudding...

- the poor man's crepe with chocolate pudding: the success of the pudding wrap made me think of adding it to the not as good fruit crepe. so chocolate pudding and frozen fruit wrapped in tortilla? messy, but a huge improvement to the first poor man's crepe.

I feel like there was one other thing I tried, but I can't remember. I got the pizza idea online, so I'm very glad I came across it. hopefully mike looks at the package count from not on! now, I'm gonna go prepare a butterscotch pudding wrap... wish me luck.

have any of you made something interesting out of a flour tortilla?
  • Drinking: water
black face is wrong. we all know this. but what if a white person wants to cosplay a black person/character? is it wrong for them to take the time to use makeup to get the features as exact as possible? we dress up as people/characters we like (usually), so would darkening the skin and making it look realistic still be considered racist, or a sign of admiration and dedication to the person/character?
  • Drinking: arizona tea

I've decided that Orbit, Jerry's late brother, is still alive. His body couldn't  be saved, so his soul went to Jerry, and Jerry let Orbie share his body instead. That's why Jerry is still so happy even though he is the only rat in the cage. He has his brother inside of him, and they are sharing the body, both enjoying the love that their parents give to them. And they take turns being in control too, so that they both get to play and explore. They may not be able to wrestle or cuddle, but they have each other, and as long as they are happy, that's all that matters.

I know there's no proof this happened. I know it's probably fantasy. I know it's pathetic. but I don't care. I DON'T CARE. I'm going to break my code of honor just this once and convince myself that this is true until I completely believe that it is. Orbie is alive.

  • Drinking: arizona tea
so, if Pluto isn't a planet anymore....

does that mean that Sailor Pluto isn't a Sailor Scout anymore?

these problems matter.
  • Drinking: arizona tea
guys, I just need a reason to feel better about something. I just need to know...

how many of you agree that rape is disgusting and wrong? (rape includes bestiality and necrophilia.)

I just need to find some human decency somewhere.


okay, here's what happened, and I'm only explaining it because I've been punished for it.

there's an adult game content site called LoversLab, and I go there to get adult content for TS4. some time ago, I saw someone had made "forced sex" animations, and I reported it. I got warning points for reporting it (they called it spamming the report button), and said that the only thing that isn't allowed is child porn, which is reasonable and, uh... EXPECTED. but I was APALLED that they didn't consider adult rape as bad as child rape. unfortunately, I had to let it go.

yesterday, I found someone made... ZOOPHILIA animations. what does this mean? raping your beloved pets. I reported it. I got more warning points for it. the people who posted it, and others who downloaded it started bullying me, saying that "it was just a game," and "it's fiction," and "it's a way to live out their fantasies." I was even told by the moderator who warned me that rape and beastiality are nothing but "fetishes." NO. fetishes don't hurt people unless the people involved WANT to be hurt (BDSM and the like). I have fetishes. I like femboys, I like yaoi, I like twinsest, I like being bitten, I like my hair pulled, and I like being choked. some people have a feet fetish, which I think is gross and weird, but still, it's not hurting anyone, and I'm sure plenty of people think MY fetishes are gross and weird. RAPE IS NOT A FETISH. IT IS A CRIME. note that when I refer to rape, zoophilia is included because they cannot give consent, they often get REALLY hurt by whoever raped them, and sometimes... they die. I LOVE animals, I get along better with other species than my own, I have so much empathy for them, only a small amount can go to humans, usually victims of abuse. even seeing an animal get hurt (not like tom and jerry style, more like the gory stuff) in a cartoon grosses me out, and seeing live action shows of animals getting maimed or killed makes me cry, even though I know it's fake, even if I can TELL the animal is a prop.

I expressed my opinions on the matter, how enjoying these kinds of animations makes you just as sick. because these animations are porn. I make my sims fuck all the time and enjoy watching it (especially when a male sim says something in simlish that sounds like "marry me," it's so cute), and I make sure to download animations which show that, even if it's aggressive sex, both/all sims involved ARE ENJOYING THEMSELVES. because... how can sex be fun if someone's not enjoying it?! but the idea of raping innocent animals makes me even sicker than raping other humans, which already makes me feel sick, especially since it's one of my biggest fears because I consider sex between me and my significant other sacred; it's an expression of love between us. now, I'm going to say something that might come off as offensive, BUT I am not condoning human rape in any way. the reason why animal rape hurts me more is because... at least humans have done SOMETHING evil in their lives. HOWEVER, I only believe the humans that deserve to be raped are rapists themselves, no matter what crimes someone has committed, if they're not rapists, I do not believe they should be raped. and yes, I sometimes use rape as a story element in some of my stories, but I ALWAYS express how wrong it is, and most important of all, I do not give details unless the victim discovers that they like it. many people think that's horrible, but even if the character consents to it during, it ensures that both/all characters involved are indeed enjoying themselves. I've only ever done this with two three characters (I suddenly remembered Taffy). one is in a story you guys don't know about (and trust me, the character who raped him constantly gets shit for it regardless, it is NOT glorified), and Kale, who is sweet and kind to everyone, even after Dominic kidnapped him, and Kale is quick to fall in love. I am still not advocating the action of force, I use Kale's best friend, Maddie, to express that THIS IS A PROBLEM, that it's horrifying, and Kale has made a horrible decision by choosing to be Dominic's pet. Taffy is a porn star and prostitute, and literally NOTHING bothers him, so even though he did not technically choose to have sex with the man, it was more like, "well, I have sex all the time, that's what I'm for!" and he equates the experience to shower sex, which, if you've ever had it, is not like the movies. it's crowded, awkward, and a decently unpleasant and comedic experience. so basically, Taffy was telling the man nicely, "you're not very good at this!" and again, I actually skipped all details, and use the other members of Hard Candy to express that, even if it didn't bother Taffy in the slightest, it was still wrong and a serious crime.

but even in fiction... it's the reason I can't watch The Hills Have Eyes again, it's the reason I partially regret watching 13 Reasons Why, and why I see Bryce in my dreams and constantly tell people, "Bryce raped Hanna Baker," or even try to kill him. and if you guys read my dream about Randy on my wordpress... well, you'll know that, after brutally killing someone I loved, he held a gun to the back of my head, violently raped me, shot me in the spine, and now I'm nearly always crippled. I woke up crying, and am still scarred by it. and I still see Randy all the time, though sometimes I love him. that was a DREAM. I was raped in a DREAM, I am not actually a rape victim, and that was enough to traumatize me because it was so real, so detailed, and so painful, I couldn't actually tell if I was awake or not. but if that was enough, can't you imagine how it must feel to have that happen to you in real life? those of you who are victims know... you don't have to share your story if you don't want to, I understand.

but why would that be entertaining to watch, whether the people are just pixels or not? why would you fantasize about that? how can you justify yourself? what I said on the thread was me asking these questions and trying to reason with people...

but then I got a warning point for "abusive behavior," and it came with this message:

"You are getting a warning point that will last for a month because you don't like something that is allowed on this site.

You will not be able to post or respond to any topic for a week.

If you don't like a mod just skip it. If its content is not against our rules it will stay."

it's not because I reported it, it's not because I complained or pleaded my side (civilly, mind you), it's because I DON'T LIKE IT. again, what makes this better than child porn? why is this allowed if child porn isn't? they are all equally horrible! I honestly want to leave the site, but at the same time, it's one of the only places I can go for quality adult content for TS4, and I have uploaded some of my own. I want to take the moderators' heads and bash them against a brick wall over and over again. last night after being told it was "okay," I cried. right now, I want to cry, my throat is tight and my stomach hurts. I'm only giving you this story because of the injustice of the punishment I have received.

why is it wrong for me to think this is horrible? why am I BULLIED for being a decent human being? WHY IS THIS OKAY?

  • Drinking: arizona tea
I am becoming heavily convinced that dreams/nightmares can trap you in sleep. I stay up pretty late and am ALWAYS tired, so I usually sleep in until like three. that also may have to do with low moods and lack of exercise. however, there are times when I am having elaborate nightmares where I don't wake up until between five and eight in the evening, depending on if Michael gets to come home for lunch or not. not only that, but I feel more exhausted than I would if I slept until three. right now, I seriously feel like I'm going to pass out, but I CAN'T go back to sleep, I need to do stuff, I slept the whole damn day away. mike always wakes me up to say goodbye before he leaves for work, but sometimes I'm so sleepy, I just slip right back into the nightmare I had been having before. and god... our sheets are hot pink, so our white mattress has a huge pink stain because of me sweating Will Graham style.

worst part is, I'm aware that I'm dreaming about 98% of the time. last night, I tried to reason to myself, because my dreams are so REAL. I tried to remember going to bed. I said, "alright, this isn't real. you're not here. last night you said goodnight to Michael, and then you went to bed. you're still in your bed in Idaho. you are NOT here." then there are the times when I make as much of a fuss as I can to try and get myself to move or make sounds in real life so that Michael knows to wake me up, but that only works 2% of the time. my dreams will try to trick me by making me feel like I'm being shaken awake, and sometimes i'll believe I'm awake until like... a random box flies into the air by itself. my projections will often try to tell me the dream is real. it's bad enough that part of my theory is that dreams are glimpses into other universes, but mine try their hardest to keep me asleep.

a lot of things happened last night, but the most vivid one was where I was tied to a wall, and Annatier slowly crept closer to me while humming the tune that I use to summon/transform into her, and when she got close enough, she used a knife to create slices in my body, and then started sewing my flesh to the wall while I was still alive. it hurt so bad. I couldn't calm her... well, she WAS calm, but I couldn't make her stop. she told me, "now you'll finally stay put." a literal trap.

I don't remember what the last thing I dreamt about was before mike woke me up on his lunch. I feel really sick right now, maybe I SHOULD go back to sleep. but if I sleep, i'll probably just have more nightmares, and I JUST took a bath to get all that goddamn sweat off. god, I hate sleeping.

have any of you guys ever been trapped in sleep by dreams?
  • Drinking: arizona tea
someone brought something up to me when we were discussing Minkie Pie's design.

First and foremost, all Muffins fans know why I designed Minkie the way I did; she's Pinkie's sister, so obviously she looks like her, they all do. Her mane is the way it is because she's never had it cut, so it's long and plain. When I designed her, I NEVER expected people to think she was a recolor of Pinkamena... I mean, the differences are so obvious. Pinkamena's swoops over, is shorter, doesn't fully cover one eye, hangs over her back so that all of the hair's ends are on the same side of the body. Not to mention the number of lines in her fringe, which is two.

Minkie's mane doesn't swoop, it lies flat on her head, it's MUCH longer, covers one eye unless her head is angled certain ways, it doesn't hang over her back, so the ends of the hairs fall to both sides of her body, and she has three lines in her fringe. To see ALL differences in full, go here:…

Most of the confusion comes with her first vector, as, even though it's different, Minkie's design wasn't as... precise... as it is now, same with Inkie and Blinkie. All new characters have their "beginning" appearance, where you suddenly notice how drastically the solid design differs from the original. Honestly, to me, modern Minkie doesn't look like Pinkamena, and many of you would agree. The people who insist that they're identical are obviously very unobservant and wouldn't be able to tell the difference between a king snake and a coral snake (red on black, you're fine, Jack. Red on yellow, you're a dead fellow.).

Still, that hasn't stopped people from harassing me about it. Many people love her design because it's simple. Unfortunately, many pieces of fanart show Minkie's mane much shorter than it is (it's better to be too long than to be too short). I like Minkie's design because it makes sense and tells her story, but at the same time, I wish people would shut the fuck up and open their eyes to the differences right in front of them... actually, I should swap Minkie's and Pinkamena's colors to show the difference with the same palette... ANYWAY...

I don't WANT to do this, so I probably won't, but I still want to hear what you guys think. *inhales... exhales...* Should Minkie Pie cut her mane before the series ends? OR should she start wearing it differently? Please refrain from being rude in the comments to me or others.


so, I've made some decisions. you guys really helped me, you all made excellent points, and you made me realize that I shouldn't change things just because some idiots like to be idiots. so here's my decision... it's been some time since Minkie was freed, right? think about children who have never cut their hair. many are scared, thinking it will hurt. what if Minkie is the same way? then her mane would've grown even LONGER. so I've decided that her mane is indeed longer than what I've previously drawn her with. I will make a vector showing it.

some also mentioned that, at the end of "the final crusade STING," Minkie had a sort of revelation that she truly is alive. and remember when twilight mentioned how pretty her eyes were when both were visible? I'm thinking a simple clip to move her bangs from her face a little, but that's it. SUBTLE changes that makes sense and have reason. she's cheered up a considerable amount since her escape due to being with ponies who love her, and she loves them. what do you guys think of this decision? and maybe she'll put her hair up every so often depending on the story and situation, like tying her hair in a knot like she did in "free like a pegasus."
  • Drinking: water
unfortunately, my drawing of Harry in lingerie has been deleted by DA. I sincerely thought it would be fine since I cut off half of the picture, and artwork off-site is out of their jurisdiction. I disputed it, but the dispute was denied, and I can't afford to try and get them to change their mind. I'm actually glad my dispute actually went through this time, last time it completely disappeared from their database. ANYWAY...

any adult themed artwork that gets removed from DA can still be found on my website, but only if you're 18+. but even though this annoys me, I have to give DA some positive feedback. the dispute system is A WONDERFUL CONCEPT. the fact that they implemented that saves all our butts because, instead of just banning you if you unknowingly upload deviations that go against DA policy (or rather, the version of the DA policy that that specific staff member has invented), they give you an opportunity to dispute the removal, and your account is still safe. I think they can tell the difference between purposefully breaking policy and not. it still irks me that the rules differ from staff member to staff member, but whatever, you can't win all battles.

DA, please create a sister site called DeviantAdult or something that's purely for mature content. XD that will never happen. i hear geese outside my window... GEESE. didn't get that in California.
  • Playing: pokemon let's go
  • Drinking: arizona tea
so I just tried pokemon let's go today, along with the pokeball plus, and they are so cool! I got the eevee version, and I was a bit disappointed that my eevee is female, but that's okay. it's like... the way pokemon go should've been and more. the pokeball plus also comes with a mew, so that's cool, but it's so cute, and the perfect controller, and the further I get into the game, the more I love it. eevee does have its anime call instead of the call from the games, but that's okay, because it's cute.
  • Drinking: water
because of those shitfaced crossdresser hating bitch brats on colors! 3D, the staff actually thinks that the character in this drawing...

Mature Content

Femboys Get No Love by Reitanna-Seishin

... is a minor. they said, "it was removed because somebody reported it, and it's sexual in nature, character appears to be a minor." oh, so in YOUR fucking opinion, a CARTOON character looks like a minor, so it IS a minor? I SPECIFIED HE WAS AN ADULT, YOU FUCKING SHIT HEADS. come on, what KID is that hung? what CHILD has those curves? that ass? those thighs?! I'm sorry, but NO child looks that delicious! I mean, if you take good care of yourself, you start to look delicious in later teens, so I mean, if they think the character is seventeen, that's hardly a minor. it shouldn't matter though, because I stated early twenties. actually... I was contemplating him being a new member to Hard Candy, who are all in their twenties, but then I decided that six was enough. still, I liked him, he's sexy. kids aren't sexy. in fact, it's REALLY creepy that they would automatically think a sexy character is a kid. that shouldn't be your first thought. and compared to my picture... all of the things in the colors! 3D gallery that are worse than mine? with actual nudity? yeah, fuck you, hypocrites. I'm gonna draw more conservative clothes over my picture and submit it again. what, you have a problem with a MAN dressing up as a sexy girl? does that BOTHER you? what, he's not transgender, so he's not ALLOWED to dress that way? what is it? is it cisphobia? is it sexism? is it homophobia? is it racism because he's black? PICK YOUR FUCKIN POISON! why are you people so... RETARDED?! yeah, I said it! I know, "retarded" is not a good word to use when calling someone stupid, and no, being mentally retarded doesn't make you bad. I grew up in a time period where we DID use "retarded" as a word to mean stupid, and it's been really hard for me to grow out of it, but you know what? there HAS to be something wrong with you if you think a cartoon character is only an adult if its proportions match an actual human adult's. FUCKING. STUPID. I'm irrational right now. FUCKING STUPID. it's people like this that make me want to bash their skulls against a brick wall repeatedly until they fucking understand things properly. there are SO many cartoons with adult characters that look like minors, and anime is a HUGE offender of that! YOUR OPINION ISN'T FACT! I am the artist! I said he's an adult! therefore, HE'S A FUCKING ADULT!! jesus MOTHERFUCKING christ! get a fucking reality check!

Rage Stamp by Reitanna-Seishin
  • Drinking: water
alright, I don't usually do this, but this kid or whatever is pissing me off to the third degree. this has to do with my "Femboys Get No Love" drawing.


26 Oct, 2018, 6:08 pm

That's transphobic of you.


26 Oct, 2018, 7:02 pm

hi, I don't understand what you meant by your rude comment on my drawing. crossdressers and transgender individuals are completely different.



26 Oct, 2018, 7:40 pm

Re: 1. It's sexualizing trans people, do your research. Though cross dressing and transgender people are different, they are closely linked together.
2. It's fetishising under aged boys
3. Back to the trans topic, the act of 'trapping' is to fool people into thinking you are a woman in order to fool a man into having sex with you, therefore it sends a bad message to people who aren't familiar to the topic transgenders. It's wrong and I think this post should be deleted
4. As a trans person, this greatly offends me, because the depiction of transwomen in this type of fashion is revolting.
5. This is pedophilic, delete this.
6. You are sexualizing. A. Young. Boy.


27 Oct, 2018, 3:13 am

XD are you seriously an idiot? traps are called that because they are boys who look so much like girls, you will only find out they are boys if they tell you, or you see them naked. there are reverse traps too. they have NOTHING to do with transgender, because transgender people aren't typically crossdressers, they dress like cisgenders do; according to their GENDER. and do you seriously not know the difference between traps and SHOTACON? i never specified the boy's age, but he's meant to be in his early 20s. you need to do some research, especially since you claim to be transgender. why are you so TRIGGERED? "trap" does not mean underage, you moron. and for the record, i hate shota. get your facts straight and shut up.


27 Oct, 2018, 9:02 am

Re: "shotas" are little boys, you idiot. "Traps" are underaged boys. It's pedophilic. You are disgusting for even trying to defend yourself.


27 Oct, 2018, 9:07 am

Maybe you need to get your facts straight. Maybe you should have put a disclaimer in the description of your photo instead of calling him 'boy', 'femboy', and in not triggered. It seems like you are. Getting pissed off when a transman finds offense in your drawing. I just think you are a pedophile. Lol


27 Oct, 2018, 9:09 am

A hit dog will hollar, and the dog definitely did here.


27 Oct, 2018, 2:59 pm

you. are. a. MORON. how young are you? sure, there are underaged traps, but not all traps are underaged! so if a guy is legal, you can't call him a boy? does that mean that, because I'm a woman, I'm not a girl? nearly all of my trap characters are of age, and the few who are not are very close to coming of age. I'm 27, so I like to keep my characters in their twenties as a way to maintain my youth. shota refers to sexualized underaged boys, and loli is sexualized underaged girls, both of which I am not okay with. besides, do you REALLY think a young boy is THAT hung? in fact, before I saw your stupid comment, I uploaded the picture to my DA and said in the description, "adult traps are even more rare than shota traps, and that pisses me off. I dunno, I'm weird. then again, there are people who LIKE shotacon, so at least I'm not THAT bad." and for the record, my boyfriend is 30 and very hairy. we've been together for 8 years and plan to get married soon. just face the fact that you're WRONG on every level, and leave me alone, or i'll report you for harassment.

I have NEVER heard of traps being defined as young boys. sure, there's shotacon with young boys being traps, but that doesn't make all traps young boys. I have Hard Candy, all of which are in their twenties, Lonnie is eighteen, Jamie I believe is either eighteen or almost eighteen, and Harry is fifteen, which IS a minor, but is old enough to decide whether he wants to have sex or not. I was 14, so yeah. but I treat him like any adult anyway because, regardless of his age for story purposes, both he and Draco are men to me. obviously some people think that, because of Boku no Piko having a thirteen year old boy crossdressing, all traps are young, but that is very much not true. I mean, if any of you go on to pornhub (you don't have to admit if you do or not), and you look up "trap," "femboy," or "sissy boy," you get PLENTY of results. and, news flash, underaged porn is ILLEGAL, so obviously the youngest boy on there is eighteen. that's how they get away with titles that include the words, "young teen."

the person claims to be transgender, but I think he/she is a transTRENDER. I doubt they understand what it's like to be transgender, and they are just some young kid who think it's cool to be "different." this hurts REAL transgender individuals because, like people who fake mental disability, it gives the non-fakers a bad name, makes other people think the ENTIRE group associated with the term is faking. I know plenty of you are transgender, and this behavior makes you sick. it makes me sick too. and this person is PISSING ME OFF because of their idiocy, and their insults based on false information about hentai, porn, and gender terms.

so even though I don't usually do this, I'm gonna go ahead and say, if you wanna have a go at him/her, there they are. this case is different. don't defend me, defend the facts. it's up to you. I think they are one of those SJW that take it too far on tumblr and gets angry at anything that could possibly be offensive to anyone.

on a side note, here's my understanding of crossdressing vs. transgender. okay... so I am a female, and I identify as a girl. I also dress like a girl on most occasions, I don't go out of my way to look like a boy, so I am cisgender and not a crossdresser. I am a feminine woman. an example of a transgender person would be a male who identifies as a girl or a female that identifies as a boy, right? so let's take a male that identifies as a girl. she's a woman born as the wrong sex, right? born into the wrong body, so even though she's male, she's still a woman, so dressing like a woman is not crossdressing, she's just dressing like cisgender non-crossdressers do. if she dressed like a boy, she would be a woman who is crossdressing, correct? am I wrong? that's how I've understood it this whole time... if you're born as a woman, but your sex is male, it doesn't make you a boy, you're still a woman. you don't magically become a woman AFTER a sex change because the surgery changes your body, not who you are. I'm just trying to imagine myself born as a male, but also as the woman I am, and it doesn't make me any less of a woman in my eyes. though honestly, vaginas REALLY suck, so I dunno if I'd want to keep the penis? but then mike wouldn't be attracted to me because he's straight. I'm just so jealous of males because it's so EASY for them to orgasm. that's not the only reason I'm jealous of males, but still... AM I WRONG?! please tell me I'm not wrong! but don't lie to me, if I'm wrong, I need to know...

  • Drinking: arizona tea
what's the point of continuing this mod if I can't get the models to work? I can't get any help with them, can't even get a response on the undertow forums... I'm sitting here trying to put all of this work into something that's obviously destined to fail. I hate it when I do this. I get all excited about something, completely forgetting that I'm not good enough to accomplish anything but mediocrity. I KNOW I'm good for nothing, so why do I fucking try? why do I ever tell myself, "I can do this!" I'm a failure, and I always will be. but it doesn't matter how much I know this, i'll eventually get excited about some other project and fail at that too. that's why I'm not putting much effort into Xtraordinary Girl! what's the point? I was born to fail. this mod is a disaster, and I should've known better to not have started it.
  • Drinking: arizona tea
I'm going to list all of the SCPs I need to replace in Containment Breach. I'm blanking on what they should be replaced with, so maybe some of my diehard fans can give me some ideas.

148 (both forms):
789-J (audio trigger only): scp-containment-breach-unity-e…

items I need to replace...

ballistic vests:…

obviously anything I replace these things with have to have similar purposes. for instance, the butt ghost is found in a toilet, and upon getting close to it, it says, "I am the butt ghost, I am going to eat your butt." so I need to figure out a different audio that can play there. you also get an achievement for it.

and in case anyone has this idea, I already thought of making 1499's dimension into the UNKNOWN quadrant. I would make everything white, and all structures and 1499-1 invisible. but I dunno, that doesn't seem like much fun? and I can't think of an item that could literally transfer you to the UNKNOWN quadrant... also, to help narrow things down, here are things that are already replacing stuff.

Nina the Lotrid
Dr. Rotkodd
Edgar the "you messed up on your drawing" fuzz
Sugar Dragon
Nightmare Mist Specters
Unleashed Charmer
Chocolate Contentment
Acid Chews
The Rage Box

and I've come up with some new things to replace a few smaller items that aren't worth mentioning.

IF YOU HAVE A NEW IDEA, I will consider making it canon in the Reitanna Fiction universe and mention you in the credits of the game. I don't have room for Others of other characters, and the things need to be weird enough to not understand how they work. you may refer to this as well:…

I don't expect a miracle, but some help would be appreciated.
  • Drinking: arizona tea
I just went through ALL of my photoshop fonts like ten times looking for the one I used for Annatier's document, and it's like... GONE. I even tried some online font identifiers, nothing. I'm sitting here like, "I JUST used it, how the hell is it NOT here?" I analyzed every single letter, lengths of serifs, scaled similar fonts to overlap and match the one I used... NOTHING. it's some kind of mix of Courier, Fixedsys, and System, and I know it's one I got for free because I don't buy fonts. it is absolutely INFURIATING. how can it not be there??? I can't just change fonts between documents, no matter how similar they are! I could recreate Anna's document... UGH!! WHERE DID IT GO???!!!
  • Drinking: arizona tea
I am in desperate need of assistance for my SCP: containment breach mod, but I can't seem to find any answers to my specific problems. I REALLY need someone who understands Blitz3D to help me, perhaps someone who has modded this game before, and NOT just texture swapping, I mean new models and everything. please help me, or maybe give me some links as to where I can find help.
  • Drinking: arizona tea
sorry, no title came to me. I just wanted to remind everyone... if you see someone talking shit about me, please don't show me. my mind doesn't let me just shrug it off, not even when I tell myself it doesn't matter. I know it doesn't, but my brain doesn't listen. it's just... if someone wants to fester in their own hate, it's not my problem, and it's certainly not yours. plus, if you guys like me, you wouldn't want to show me something that made me feel sad, right?

on a related note, if you guys find any slander about me online, and you go, "I didn't know about that! she's terrible!" come to me for the facts, alright? haters tailor stories to their own narrative, leaving out details that negate their claims. I will always tell you what's true and what's false, and if you're civil, I will be too. never trust anything bad that's said about me, just get your information from the source.

unfortunately, the world is not kind. there are people who like to fill their ego by bringing others down. they waste their time on a complete stranger like me, while I'm doing something productive like learning how to 3D model and program games. I don't need to bring other people down to feel good about myself, I have a decently good life for someone who has been through what I have. and you guys should also remember that. remember that there will always be people better than you... but there will also always be people you're better than. I know there are a lot of people reading this will low self esteem like me, with personal problems that make us behave in ways we don't want to behave, but as long as we're not hurting anyone, as long as we aren't the ones to start drama, and as long as we're doing everything we can to be happy, we're fine. we're allowed to be human, even if our brains are wired incorrectly. not only that, but we're allowed to be honest about what's wrong with us. I would literally chop off both my legs to be cured of my mental problems, but there IS no cure, only therapy, only things that can make us feel better, and medication that at least dampens the symptoms. we know we are far from perfect, we know our problems don't make us special, they just make life harder. people will always find a reason to hate you, even if it's for illogical reasons. even if your brain can't allow you to just shove it off, that doesn't mean they're right.

and as an addendum, if you see someone talking shit about me, you don't have to defend me. they call you guys my "white knights," and that's weird, since it's been a long time since I've "sent" my fans on someone, you know, back when my maturity levels were much lower than they are now. what they say about me might offend you as well, but it's not your problem. if you REALLY have to say something, just say, "you're wrong," but that person WANTS to be flamed, so don't give it to them. you guys are NOT my "white knights," my "soldiers," my "army," or whatever, you guys are my fans and friends, and you have no obligations to stand up for me. your heart may be in the right place, but you, with that kind, honest heart, cannot understand the ways of these hateful people, and anything you say will not change their minds, and in fact, might make it WORSE. they literally think I send you guys out to attack my haters. don't give them more reasons to think that.

I want to thank everyone who continues to support me, even if I'm annoying, even if I have a lot of problems that I complain about, even if I rant about useless things. I also want to thank anyone, fan of mine or stranger, who is kind and spends their lives doing things that they love to do, positive, non-hurtful things. we don't have enough of you. I wish I could change the world. I wish I were perfect. reality says I can't do either of those things. but with the internet, there will always be sheep who hide their faces from the people they harass, because they know that they'd be cowering in fear in person. let them fester in their cess pool, and remember... the hurt doesn't last forever. even if you can't shove it off now, you know you'll get over it at some point.

the only good thing about having chronic short term memory loss... XD I just have to remind myself that I'm alright. my mind loves to panic over these things, and I have to convince it that everything is fine. it would be impossible without my effixor. that stuff saved my life.
  • Drinking: water
so, if you've been following my recent deviations, I'm going back to modding SCP Containment Breach, except instead of making it colorful and funny to fit my personality, I'm making into a story that's actually a sequel to the unmade game, Five Nights with Annatier. see here:…

the story to that game, which may never be made (we'll see), is that a new facility is opened up in Wayward City, and the owners ask Reitanna to let them study Annatier. you don't play as Reitanna, as she is "phone guy," you play as a security guard... obviously. but Annatier didn't consent to being locked up and studied, so she starts to cause trouble.

in this mod of SCP CB, the facility has been expanded, extra safety measures are set in place, and this time, the owners ask Annatier to be apart of it again. she accepts, but ends up getting bored and decides to stir up some trouble. Sei and Rina are also there by request, and you play as Reitanna, so is staying in the facility with a number of other people to help with testing and study. it's not much fun, though, and the "guests" are more like prisoners.

I need a name for this facility. I'd love for you guys to help me out with this. the only idea I have is, "Encephalon Study and Test Facility." LAME. ESTF.
  • Drinking: arizona tea
so I went to see my new psychiatrist yesterday, and as always, I had to answer many, MANY questions, as well as sort of summarize my life story. we were actually there longer than we probably should've been because she wanted to know more about me, and she said I was "fascinating." she's not the first professional who has told me that. I had someone comment on youtube and said, "as a criminal investigator, I'd love to just sit down with you and listen to you talk." I told mike about this, and he said, "well, yeah. you're perfect for study, you're the type of person people write papers on." I dunno, it gave me that shameful feeling of being special in some way. I mean, I'm NOT, but it still felt kinda good. I mean, it's okay to feel special every once in awhile, right? or should I be punishing myself for the feeling like I do if I'm too proud of something?
  • Drinking: water
hey guys? um... if I get snippy, or bitchy, or upset with any of you for like no reason, please don't take it too seriously. it's been hectic trying to get an appointment with a psychiatrist, and I FINALLY have one on Wednesday, but that means I haven't been able to get my medication, so we've had to ration it out by cutting pills. I've been noticing the difference in my behavior because of it, and I just want everyone to know that, if I don't seem like myself, it's because I'm not... or I am... which one is the real me? the one without the meds or with?
  • Drinking: water
I was sending a text to Sempai that said, "are you okay?" because paranoid Reitanna is paranoid. "Are" had a red line underneath. I was like, "are you serious?" so I selected it, and it gave me a bunch of corrections, as well as "add to dictionary." do you want to know what one of the corrections was? "Are." same spelling, same capitalization, it was exactly the same. I clicked it, and the red line went away. GO FIGURE.

anyone wanna share some hilariously stupid autocorrect stories?
  • Playing: The Sims 4
  • Drinking: water