raycaster

I come to this site mainly to get inspired and view amazing artwork from people around the world. I am in awe by the works being done, while I am doing nothing. My photography has been absent from my life for a long time. I have been doing random headshots or dance student portfolio work, but I have not done any project for myself in years. I am at a point where I just hate pulling out my lights and waiting for a client to show up. I decided to take down a lot of my "paid" services because 1) I can never make a living in photography without doing the generic crap that I hate and drains my soul and 2) no one wants to pay me to do what I want to do. I have a job and photography has always been an outlet, but there was a part of me that wanted to try and make a living at it. I never got into it and now I am at the point where I hate doing anything photo related. 

The other part that makes it hard for me is I have lost my muses. If you notice, most of my work is usually with 2 people. I love working with those two and not having them around makes things less enjoyable. I could find other collaborators to get my visions out, but that process has been tough. I get a lot of offers, but most of the time its by people I do not feel anything from. They are lifeless one-look people that just want to get pictures taken.

So there is a void. Its a deep dark void that has been with me for a long long time. I think now that I have officially made the decision to not take on any projects from people that are in it for their own promotion and where I get nothing from it, I can perhaps open myself up to getting back into creating my own work. I am perfectly happy paying for a models time especially if it takes the pressure of giving them something in return. I hate TFP situations. 

Anyway, just wanted to rant and just say that I am still here looking at everyone's amazing work. I hope to contribute with my own work soon....I need to find a muse again.

Thanks for reading.