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We've got a little under 36 hours to go on the Fairy Tales I Just Made Up kickstarter. We are so close! If you enjoy my sense of humor at all, you NEED a copy of this book! So why don't you pledge a couple dollars, and preorder your very own copy?…

Just look at all this cool bonus swag that's available!

1b50c77192f2b0fb00845ed64ec861ac Large by raisegrate
  • Listening to: Aquera de Brasil - my theme song
  • Reading: The Shadow Hero
  • Watching: Attenborough's 'Put A Bird On It'
  • Playing: a buncha demos I downloaded
  • Eating: chickenless tortilla soup
  • Drinking: so much milk!
Hi Everybody! If you're at all a fan of my sense of humor, you need to check out my new book, Fairy Tales I Just Made Up. It's full of Snarky Bedtime Stories for Weirdo Children, and we're doing a kickstarter to raise the funds to print it.…   You only have until August 5th to kick in a couple dollars, and get your very own copy, so please please please support this awesome project!

Fairy Tales I Just Made Up Sneek Preview by raisegrate

I'll be at the San Diego Comic Con next week - leave a comment if you will be too, we'll wave at each other!

  • Listening to: Aquera de Brasil
  • Reading: Spell or High Water
  • Watching: Arrested Development
  • Playing: Super Luigi Brothers
  • Eating: watermelon
  • Drinking: Plenty of Water
Well! It's been more than six months since my last journal, saying I was moving to Oregon. Now it's time for an update saying I'm moving back to California. Michelle and I are having a baby! A little pumpkin in October.

Living abroad had always been a temporary arrangement, but I think we're gonna end up cutting it shorter than expected because of the NEW BIG LIFE CHANGE. I am excited and nervous and distracted and hungry, it's been a busy time.

I'm also giving a keynote address next week at LITJAM 2014 in Susanville California, so expect an empassioned speech from me on the subject of Following Your Dreams in a few weeks time!

The other big news is that FAIRY TALES I JUST MADE UP, an awesome collection of Snarky Bedtime Stories For Weirdo Children I've been percolating on for a looooooong time is finally finished, and is coming out JUNE 15th! I'll have some more sample chapters and videos, and even an art contest ready to share with you guys shortly, this book is amazing, the best thing I've ever done, and I am so dang proud to have collaborated with so many fine illustrators, old friends and new, to give the book such an amazing variety. If you like my work, you are strongly encouraged to visit and preorder your copy today.Fairy Tales I Just Made Up Sneek Preview by raisegrate
  • Listening to: Rafi
  • Reading: What to Expect When You're Specting
  • Watching: Clone Wars
  • Playing: Ticket to Ride
  • Eating: NOT BAGELS >:(
  • Drinking: My Fav Tea I thought was discontinued!
  • Listening to: Mika
  • Reading: John Hodgman
  • Watching: Vsauce
  • Playing: Munchkin
  • Eating: lots of pantry items
  • Drinking: limeade
Well! I am now married, honeymooned, and living with my lovely bride in Eugene Oregon. We moved from outside LA area, in California, semi-randomly, as part of our new 'adventure based life initiative'. We figured a state away is good training wheels for living in even more exotic crazy places, which seems like a fun thing to do while we're still young and mobile.

I am working on more Divine Whiners, and a book collection once some of these storylines are further along. I'm also still putting the finishing touches on Fairy Tales I Just Made UP (something I've been doing for months, sadly) so that will be published as soon as I can. Top Shelf reports a Spring 2014 release date for Pirate Penguin book 2. I'm writing on my novel, and doing sketches for a Mystery Project of Super Coolness I hope to be able to talk about shortly.

Life is going good! Still getting organized and figuring out what I'm doing exactly, paying rent is a lovely new experience, so figuring out how to blast my finances to the next level is an ongoing concern. Still, I'm not starving, I have the opportunity for vast amounts of new socializing once I make some Oregon friends, and I've got plenty of creative projects I'm excited about to keep me occupied. Plus, a new wife and life partner in the form of Michelle, which is a delightful distraction all  by herself.

Anybody going to the Portland Comic Con next month? Anybody that's a new neighbor of mine, gimme a wave!

  • Listening to: Waltz Music so I can learn how to Waltz
  • Reading: Who Censored Roger Rabbit
  • Watching: New Community
  • Playing: Uh... nothing.
  • Eating: no sugar whatsoever, hopefully no carbs neither
  • Drinking: boring old water
Posting New Stuff to DA has gotten a little trickier for me now, my computer, while very fast and good, is a powermac, rather than an intel based, and so certain programs like Firefox are upgraded as far as they can go, they don't make stuff for my machine anymore. Deviant Art's new upload system just will not work on my computer, I've tried everything. So now when I want to upload, I have to bring the files home and put them on my laptop and upload them on the slow internet, it's jolly annoying. You might be tempted to leave a comment saying 'get a new computer' or even 'not an apple computer' but I won't be listening to those, I don't plan on spending any money thanks.

My wedding is coming up in April, and it's hogging all my available free time and money, as I fully expected it to, and allow it to unbegrudgingly. Still wish everything was magically accomplished and I didn't have to do anything besides show up : )

Had a lovely time at the Doctor Who convention the other weekend, you may have noticed a couple new pieces I created got posted to DA. The Whoniverse stickers are available on my etsy store, if you want to buy them, cut them out, and stick them on your own luggage or laptop or whathaveyou.

I don't plan on exhibiting at the LA Times festival of books this year, I always enjoy having a booth this year, but I've just got too much going on. Maaaaaaybe if they give me a free booth unexpectedly, but I still don't think so. It's been a slow year for events and booksignings, I haven't put anything new out to promote for a while. I'm putting the finishing touches on Pirate Penguin book two AS WE SPEAK, but I don't know when that will actually be released. I've also written an enormously funny book called 'Fairy Tales I Just Made Up' -- it's about 75% done. You can see a sneak preview here on DA. I was hoping to get it done and published BEFORE my nuptials, but it's going to have to wait till after to receive my full attention. Luckily, it's not done yet for reasons outside my control, I'm collaborating with 12 other artists for all the illustrations, and three people aren't done yet, so I don't feel too bad. I always want everything available immediately, but sometimes, you just gotta wait for it.

Somebody asked if Divine Whiners is going to be in book form (my 3X weekly webcomic, which I plaster on DA, so if you're reading this, you should be reading that) -- the answer is 'of course it will be in book form, but I have no idea when. I'm 80+ strips in, which is only about 25 pages if it's laid up in book form, so I won't have the content for a while. Very much looking forward to seeing how this story pans out, as I only have notions of where it's going, rather than a concrete plan. I'll be introducing some of the Hindu deities next. Any gods I haven't used yet anybody's dying to see?

I won't have a booth at the San Diego Comic Con this year either, which is painful, but which I'm sure was the best decision. It costs an AWFUL lot of money to exhibit at the SDCC, and if you work your butt off at the con, you can *maybe* break even if you don't think about the cost of merchandise. It's stressful, and as I said, my wedding is requiring every ounce of cash I can get my hands on. (Now would be the perfect time to buy some merch from me, either from Etsy: or from my website: -- I've got oodles of books and toys and tshirts). Also, I'm taking commissions for a short period, which isn't something I usually do, so if you want me to draw something FOR YOU, send me a note, and we'll chat about it.

Also, the North American Discworld Convention is in July, I'm Art Director, so I've been busy working on Tshirt Desgins, Posters, and the program book cover. I sincerely hope you can go! I sincerely hope I can go! Haven't sorted out the finances yet.

Is that all? I Think that's all. I need to get organized man, I am all over the place lately. Maybe I'll be able to get my act together one of these years.


Merry Something!

If you need to buy cool presents for the people you love, or maybe presents you love for people that are cool, might I humbly/shamelessly remind you I've written 6 or 7 awesome books, and that I also have Tshirts and Plush Toys?

Check em out at my online store:

We've got some really killer deals! Now is the perfect time to give me some money!

I also debated titling this 'cyberman monday' but that wasn't as good.
  • Listening to: Harmontown
  • Reading: The Last Dragonslayer/Moab is My Washpot
  • Watching: Lord of the Rings Marathon
  • Playing: Little Big Planet Karting
  • Eating: too much chocolate like a fat idiot
  • Drinking: Samurai Chai
I find myself unexpectedly flying to the Big Apple this weekend, Oct 12-13-14! I'll be signing at the Top Shelf booth for part of the day on Friday, and probably for a longer chunk on Sunday, which is also Kids Day. I don't have any clues as to the exact times, my schedule is still coalescing into shape. Who else is gonna be at the con? Make sure you come say hi, I'll draw you penguins!

Also, this is my first trip to NY (if you don't count a couple hours on my way somewhere else 5 years ago) -- anything you recommend I go see/avoid? Advice!
  • Listening to: Campfire Drumming
  • Reading: My Kindle! Also Dodger
  • Watching: All the New Shows that Just Started
  • Playing: Lego POTC
  • Eating: Honks of steak
  • Drinking: Cucumber Soda? What?
A New Project!

I decided to write the most ridiculous children's book of all time, and 'Fairy Tales I Just Made Up' happened. I don't know how to include pictures in this journal, but I've posted the cover in my gallery.

I am super excited about this book. For some reason, I'm not illustrating it myself, I've recruited a bunch of my friends to do each different story, so it has a lot of variety. I'm not ready to say who'll be drawing it yet, some paperwork stuff is still in flux, but you will totally recognize them, and the artwork I've gotten back so far is just *fantastic*.

More information, and some teaser pages to come shortly.

Also, you may have noticed, I've started a new webcomic, Divine Whiners, starring the gods Hermes, Quetzacoatl, and Thor. I've always been fascinated by cultures with many gods, as their myths are sort of an enormous soap opera, with all sorts of crazy characters having adventures. There have been a few 'old gods in the new world stories, from Neil Gaiman and Douglas Adams, to A. Lee Martinez and Marie Phillips (who's wonderful novel 'Gods Behaving Badly' is turning into a movie shortly, with Christopher Walken as Zeus!) Well, here's my take, it's probably the silliest one. I hope you enjoy it, please reccommend your favorite gods you'd like to see appear, it's starting with a few characters and growing, I've already got some fun ideas for the Egyptian and Hindu deities.

Also also happy birthday to me last week! I turned old.
  • Listening to: Birthday Mix Tape
  • Reading: The Time Machine Did It
  • Watching: Doctor Who Season 7
  • Playing: Too Much Lego Star Wars
  • Eating: Thai Food Burritos
  • Drinking: Coconut Water
Are you descending upon Nerd Mecca with the rest of the droves? I'll be there!

Booth #2003, come and say hi! Or Else!

I'll be signing books, selling tshirts & plush toys, and being charming. Or Else!
  • Listening to: Whatever Michelle decides to play
  • Reading: The Long Earth
  • Watching: Legend of Korra/Fringe I've missed
  • Playing: games on my ipod in the bathroom
  • Eating: Pear & Queso Fresco Spinach Salad
  • Drinking: Protein Shakes
I should have mentioned this a little while ago, but I didn't so here we are.

I am currently in Calgary, Canada, a special guest of the Calgary Comics Expo! Anybody who lives anywhere nearby, this is the perfect opportunity to come say hi and have me draw penguins at you!

Next week, Saturday May 4th, I will be doing a Free Comic Book Day signing at Gosh! Comics in London. England fans! Same thing like I said about the penguins at Canadians a paragraph ago!

That is all. For now. Anybody who wants to have me come and visit their city or country, you are more than welcome to buy me plane tickets!

  • Listening to: myself humming
  • Reading: Sacre Bleu! - Christopher Moore
  • Watching: Canadian Television
  • Playing: at being personable and talking to people
  • Eating: frickin beef jerky and hot chocolate for dinner
  • Drinking: free bottles of water

Until April 16th, I am doing commissions, so if there was ever anything you wanted me to design and draw specially for you, give me a PM and I'll get doodling. Prices vary based on what you want, but lets say about $20 for something simple, $40 for something complicated? Other than that, totally up to you. My characters, yours, for use as avatars or other things, what-have-you.

Normally, my finances are pretty regular, but I've had a couple unexpected bills occur lately. A crack in my car window, flat tire, my shoes completely falling apart, and a trip to the dentist, all in the space of the same week, not to mention my taxes. This has been an unusual month, and I feel the need to supplement my usual revenue streams.

Speaking of selling, you probably know I have books and plush toys and tshirts with all my characters available on my wonderful webularsite, If you've ever thought of purchasing the Pirate Penguin Vs Ninja Chicken book, with a 50 page never seen on the internet story, Now is the Best Possible Time! So check out my store, at

Cheers! Thanks for enjoying my work!

  • Listening to: Whatever Pandora Decides
  • Reading: A. Lee Martinez
  • Watching: Fringe
  • Playing: Draw Something on my ipod
  • Eating: Lentils
  • Drinking: Water
So! Me and Michelle are engaged! I got down on one knee at the grand canyon a couple days ago, wedding in 2013 sometime. I've been advised not to say "And You're All Invited" over the internets, as we don't have enough chicken for the ceremony, but invitations to people we actually know will occur at somepoint.

Very very happy, me and Michelle are really suited to each other, she not only puts up with all my weirdness, but actually enjoys most of it!
  • Listening to: Audio books I've allready heard
  • Reading: Sherlock Holmes and Mary Russell -- the Moor
  • Watching: Father Ted
  • Playing: tintin vgame
  • Eating: BRIE!
  • Drinking: Hot Chonklit
Lookit this wonderful Halloween themed Pirate Penguin vs Ninja Chicken Fancomic Doctor Mo created!…
  • Listening to: Harry Belafonte
  • Reading: Snuff
  • Watching: Alton Brown
  • Playing: Little Big Planet
  • Eating: Peppercorns
  • Drinking: Chateau SevenUppe Super FreshTM White Wine
So... I forgot that it's October again, and haven't planned any Pirate Penguin vs Ninja Chicken spoooooky stories. I think once in 10 years did I manage to do a cartoon that tied in to a holiday. I don't know what my deal is.

Since we last spoke, PPvsNC book one came out, I've gotten the go ahead to draw book 2, which has to try and top it somehow.  I shall *probably* suspend the weekly Pirate Penguin webcomic while I draw the book so I don't penguin myself out, having a double dose, but something else interesting will undoubtedly take it's place, and help me recharge my creative batteries.

Me and Michelle keep buying more furniture for our little apartment, it looks delightfully crammed, with secret dinosaurs hidden everywhere. Little Big Planet has taken up all my free time, and I'm having lots of lack-of-creativity-guilt.

I have no idea what my next major project will be, I've got about a dozen ideas vying for my attention, and picking which one to focus on is hard. I'm publishing my friend, Scott Meyer's book, the third collection of his webcomic Basic Instructions (the first two were published by Dark Horse) -- so that's making me feel totally legit.

I flew up to Seattle last week to hang with Terry Pratchett and his WonderPA Rob during their signing for Snuff. I don't think an official publication of my Glom of Nit fancomic is in the works, but I'm not gonna get in any trouble (probably) for it either, and they continue to give me projects, I've got a lot more Official Discworld Graphic Design to do in the coming months, which is gonna be super awesome. I also did a review of 'Going Postal' that will be appearing on the library-comic 'Unshelved' at some point.

Issue 2 of the Doctor Who fanzine 'VworpVworp' comes out quite soon -- I didn't make the cut, my Doctor Who comic is gonna appear in issue #3, whenever that is. Once my story is published by them, I can put it online, where I shall probably start drawing some sequels, and infinite amount of material is occurring to me. Wish I could find someone interested in paying for it, I could easily make a career out of drawing that penguinmonster. I could write for the show as well, I really think I capture it's tone well. Some day! I'll have to fake being British...

That's all the update I can think of for now, I'll amend if anything occurs to me. Anybody have any questions? You there, in the back, with the kitten up your nose, is your hand raised?
  • Listening to: Harry Belafonte
  • Reading: Snuff
  • Watching: Alton Brown
  • Playing: Little Big Planet
  • Eating: Peppercorns
  • Drinking: Chateau SevenUppe Super FreshTM White Wine
I've finally cleared out my enormous archive of messages! I always try and reply to everybody, but I've been quite busy of late, and a backlog occurred. Let's see how long it takes to fill up again!

BTW: Anybody gonna be in San Diego next week for ComicCon? Come and see me at booth 2304, OR ELSE.

  • Listening to: Buddy Holly
  • Reading: Chasing The Moon
  • Watching: Stuff
  • Playing: Thud
  • Eating: Scrampled Eggs
  • Drinking: Water Fromma Jug
I'm slightly behind on everything at the moment, pirate penguin cartoons, answering emails and comments, setting up booksignings, ETC. It's a bit crazy around here of late!

In addition to The Usual which occupies my time, I've been the Art and Stuff head honcho for the 2011 North American Discworld Convention! Hands up, everybody who reads these things of mine, and is in to discworld, do you know about the con? It's next month in Wisconsin, Terry Pratchett is gonna be there to sign autographs, and a good chunk of the decoration and free goodies are by yours truly. If at all humanely possible, you should attend! I went to the first one in 2009, and it was the most concentrated weekend of fun I think I've ever had. There are a few memberships left.

In the meantime, forgive my general absence, I'm working hard, but not necessarily on things you're gonna see!

  • Listening to: My New iPod
  • Reading: Rereading Terry Pratchett
  • Watching: How I Met Your Mother
  • Playing: Angry Birds (I Know, Right?)
  • Eating: delicious cream of mushroom pasta
  • Drinking: Pear Vodka cocktail
My friend Josh lives in Alabama, and his house is one of many that was completely destroyed in the Tornadoes a couple days ago. Josh is fine, here's a video he and my friend Joe made in the rubble… -- (Joe is my colorist btw, does all my comics -- his house, 20 minutes down the road is fine, and so he will be able to keep coloring for me!)

I'd like to help Josh, and I am donating some money to him and charities in the area (I've visited that neck of the woods a couple times, have friends there) but I don't have much free cash at my disposal, so here is my idea:

I am gonna do charity sketches. Get in touch with me, I will draw you anything you want, and all the money will be split between Josh and the Anti-Tornado Lazer-Cannon fund (or something, I'm doing charity research.) Sketches are $10, anything more complicated we'll discuss. Send me a DM if you're interested, or email, or tweet or what-have-you.

  • Listening to: Murray Gold
  • Reading: Michael Palin
  • Watching: Day of the Moon
  • Playing: Back to the Future part II (I'm behind)
  • Eating: Raw Vegan Cleansing Diet of Doom
  • Drinking: Vitamin Powder

First of all, I just got a box of my new book Piranha Pancakes in, so it is ready for buying! It makes a wonderful present for anybody you know, including yourself (yourself being the person, I'd wager, you know the best!) even if it's not a seasonal thing, you should still like my book! 100 pages of Raymondy Humor at it's finest.-- I've got a preview of a couple pages up here on DA. Lookit 3 Cover Evolution by raisegrate Piranha Pancakes Preview by raisegrate

If you're still in a buying mood, I also have Pirate Penguin Plush Toys Pirate Penguin Plushie Photos by raisegrate and a Christmasy Steampunk eBook Steampunk Christmas by raisegrate for a couple bucks, to put you in a very silly holiday mood.

Okay, enough consumerism! Hope everybody is enjoying themselves, thanks for enjoying my work!

  • Listening to: Gary Hoey
  • Reading: Mutts
  • Watching: Christmas Vacation
  • Playing: DnD for the first time
  • Eating: Homemade Fudge
  • Drinking: Burpy Cola
My newest book, Piranha Pancakes is now officially DRAWN! It's at the printers, and I should have it back in my hands ready to autograph and ship middle of december. PLEASE BUY COPIES AS PRESENTS FOR EVERYONE YOU HAVE EVER MET, IT IS MAGICALLY DELICIOUS.
  • Listening to: Enevitable Christmassy Music
  • Reading: Fan Mail
  • Watching: Fantasia
  • Playing: Online Risk
  • Eating: French Fries
  • Drinking: Chai Pumpkin Something
My Doctor Who: Penultimate Supper piece Doctor Who Penultimate Supper by raisegrate is one of seven finalists to win a dvd boxset of season five -- can everybody go vote for me on ? It would mean ever so much! Help me spread the word as well!
  • Listening to: Pepper Sunflower Seeds
  • Reading: Gods Behaving Badly
  • Watching: Craig Fergusson
  • Playing: Too Much Tetris
  • Eating: free ham
  • Drinking: water