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Literature
Outcast
You’re standing beyond the boundary
Looking in
And you’re clinging desperately to something you’ve
Never been
There must be something here
You can call your own
But you’re always standing on the outside
All alone
The world comes crashing down
At the break of day
And you’ve tried so hard to tell yourself
That you’ll be okay
Memories slip through your grasp
As you fade from time
But you can’t forget the one thing you could
Never find
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:iconrahdiyan:Rahdiyan 2 0
Literature
Zel'nair
I'm walking down this crumbling road
Again
The world keeps changing
Yet it's all the same
The fading daylight cannot hide
These scars
One more 'tomorrow'
Fades to 'yesterday'
But still I'm marching on
There is a light in the distance
It leads me on
It calls my name
And guides me on my way
And while I long for tomorrow
I want to leave this life
Give up this path
And throw it all away
Today
What point in fighting
When you're all alone?
Each life's a moment
Then they fade to grey
You'd think by now
I'd have a heart of stone
Yet each new meeting
Makes me long to stay
But still you call me on
There is a wind blowing onwards
It knows my past
It knows my fate
Yet guides me anyway
And when I long, full of sorrow, for home
You lift me up
And push me on
And call me by my name:
Zel'nair
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:iconrahdiyan:Rahdiyan 1 0
Literature
Untitled
Here the wind that blows
 has always called my name
Here the shining rays
 peer out from falling rain
Waiting in the dark
 and dreaming of the dawn
Hoping in my heart
 that I can carry on
Holding in my hands
 a quiet memory
Of a promise made
 and a path to take
In the cold I hold it close
 and listen carefully
To the words I spoke
 long ago
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Happy 16th, Deviantart! by Rahdiyan Happy 16th, Deviantart! :iconrahdiyan:Rahdiyan 0 0
Literature
Beyond the Horizon
Clouds radiated across the sky in sweeping arcs, crystalline white against luminescent azure. As far as the eye could see, just sky and land—a flat, gray-brown expanse, the horizon so unbroken by trees or structures that the wind galed almost constantly across it. He had never seen a place so empty and unmoved. If not for the wind and the clouds shifting over head, he may have believed the world had stopped, frozen in a breath of time.
His older companion smiled down at him, a hint of mischief in silver-green eyes.
“You seem surprised; surely, you did not believe the mountains went on forever?”
He shook his head.
“I knew the mountains end; I’ve seen the ocean, and walked through forests and rolling hills. But this…?”
He shook his head again. He had no words for how it made him feel.
“There is much to the world that you have yet to experience or learn about,” his companion informed him.
Those eyes, ageless with wisdom, gazed across t
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Literature
Drowning
Sitting on the bottom looking up.
I struggled as I sank, limbs thrashing, hands slapping the water while I tried, desperate, to keep my head over the surface. It didn't look so much to everyone else, but the panic was real, too real to cry out for help. I'm drowning; I don't have air to waste screaming. They just keep swimming over head, oblivious.
So here I am, so far down you won't see me unless you're looking in the right spot. Don't expect a wave or a smile. I'm too tired for that. I can't reach up for a hand extended downwards, but don't mistake it for giving up. I'm not ready to accept defeat.
Still holding my breath despite the pain.
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Literature
Why Do I Take These Quests
Oh give me a home
Where no Druffalo roam
'Cause they're slow and they smell really bad
And if there's one more word
About guiding the herd
I'll stab you and burn down your home
Why do I take these quests?
They're always tedious at best
I don't need your sword
And if I wasn't bored
You can bet that you would be ignored
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:iconrahdiyan:Rahdiyan 0 1
Literature
Pain is Easy
Pain is easy.
You know where it is, where it comes from. A sliver in your finger. Stubbed toe. Broken arm. Heartburn. There’s more than one kind. Sadness. Guilt. Grief. But there’s still a reason, and regardless of how and how long, you know why.
Depression is ‘pain’. Not physically. It’s like a hole that can’t be filled. Everything could be perfect for you, but you can’t shake it. It can’t be torn out, or cut off, because it’s a hole. Holes are empty. Depression is empty, and it’s heavy. A burden you want to run from. Surround yourself with the good things. Try to forget. The hole doesn’t vanish, but some things can help to prop it up so the emptiness doesn’t bury you.
Anxiety is not pain.
It doesn’t have a reason. It can’t be poked and measured anymore than depression can. You can’t tell where it is. You don’t know what it is. You try. You try so hard. Everything is exploding, in an
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:iconrahdiyan:Rahdiyan 4 2
Phoenix Fire Duet by Rahdiyan Phoenix Fire Duet :iconrahdiyan:Rahdiyan 0 2
Literature
We Live
Let us pause a moment, and ponder. For a few minutes, forget the tree, the presents, the same old songs.
This isn’t a time of parcels and packages. Not a time of things. No single thing could compare to the message of hope and peace already left to us.
It doesn’t matter if you believe in the babe in the manger. It doesn’t matter if you believe he is the son of God. It doesn’t matter even if you believe the story of Christ to be any more than that—a story. Real or not, that’s your choice. But the lessons to be learned are more than who he is. The story, the tale, the hope, is not what he is, but what he did.
He wasn’t rich. He must have lacked many of the comforts afforded to others. He wasn’t one of the ‘popular’ group—he was, in fact, hated by those in power. But his own lowly station didn’t stop him from showing love. Compassion. Understanding. He saw others in need and gave them everything he could
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Kaze's Journey by Rahdiyan Kaze's Journey :iconrahdiyan:Rahdiyan 2 4 Arch Nemesis 2 by Rahdiyan Arch Nemesis 2 :iconrahdiyan:Rahdiyan 0 1 Arch Nemesis by Rahdiyan Arch Nemesis :iconrahdiyan:Rahdiyan 1 1
Literature
Stranger in a Crowd
Frozen in place.
Solid.
Broken.
Soundless in the silence.
Cold.
No heart to beat,
no breath to quicken.
Empty.
Hollow.
Music wakes not sleeping ears;
fragrance forsakes lost smell;
and all the world goes on in glory,
careless as they pass me by.
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So, the last several months have been an interesting experience for me. Some of you know already, but back in March of this year, I was diagnosed with Breast Cancer. Whee (not). Things actually haven't been too bad, though, because 1: I have awesome people helping me out, and 2: I really haven't been worried about it the whole time I've been going through chemotherapy. In fact, I've rather been quite cheerful the whole time.

It's kind of hard to explain without going into a giant story time that I'm not sure I feel like posting here. But to sum it up, for the past several years, I've been in this giant anxious/depressed state that was hard to get anything done with. I was actually to the point of feeling suicidal, though I never got so far as trying to harm myself. Then some things happened last year, including me going to a self reliance course, getting out of the relationship that was apparently causing me a lot of the depression, and getting myself a modest job that was allowing me some income and feeling like I had some worth again, even though I sort of dreaded going, just because of the whole 'PEOPLE!' aspect of it. (Let's face it, unless you one of the lucky few, you're just plain going to have to work/interact with people while working.) I even have my own car, now.

Things were looking so good, in fact, that I decided I was going to try going back to school this year. I'm only four classes away from finishing up an art degree, and about the same if I want to finish an English one, as well.

And then last March I went and finally got this lump checked out.

I'd known it was there for about a year and a half before that, but as mentioned, I was suicidal. It felt like it wouldn't matter if I died, so if it was something that might lead to that, I didn't care. Unsurprisingly, it's cancer. Breast Cancer. Stage 3.

Most people probably would have been freaking out at that stage. Especially since I'm so young to be getting it (I'm only 30, after all). A lot of people seem to think that it's the end of the world. But if anything, it was... a relief, I guess. This wasn't just some 'in my head' problem. The suspicion I'd had for over a year was confirmed. It was kind of liberating, actually.

Granted, going through the chemotherapy for the last three and some months has been a bit of a drag. For the first four rounds, I was feeling generally sick and tired for days after each one, and had this perpetually awful taste in my mouth; for the last four, I'd get this wonderful (read sarcastically) aching in my muscles and joints. I've got some bills to worry about, I had to stop working because my job and chemo just wouldn't have mixed well at all, but I've had a lot of support the whole way. I've had time where I can just be chill and no one expects anything from me for once. I've written thousands of words of story, hundreds of thousands, even, because the pressure is off. The only things I have to worry about (for the most part) are keeping my appointments and where I want said story to go. (It's seen a lot of editing, and there will be MUCH more to come).

And the people who see me at church are always saying how I look so cheerful. I'm so happy, so strong, so upbeat. I've been divorced and have cancer for crying out loud, and I'm feeling better than I have in years?

Yeah, all I can say is that I was seriously broken for a while, and I've found a way to start picking up the pieces. That's really the only thing that I can see that would cause that.

My only gripe is that with surgery, radiation therapy, and another surgery after that sometime probably mid-November, I won't be able to start going back to work and school until next year. I had sort of been looking forward to finishing at least one of those degrees sooner than later. Guess it wasn't quite in the cards, though.

So, I'll keep writing, and sketching character designs, singing songs, playing Final Fantasy XIV, and working on recovery. Who knows, with some luck, Outcast might actually take off, and I'll get a decent income. But I'll have to figure out how to sand out the flaws and rough patches before I'll be comfortable with sharing it with the world in general. Feels like I'm on the right track, though.

Up, up, and away! *dodges another baseball*
  • Reading: The Riyria Chronicles by Michael J. Sullivan
You’re standing beyond the boundary
Looking in
And you’re clinging desperately to something you’ve
Never been

There must be something here
You can call your own
But you’re always standing on the outside
All alone

The world comes crashing down
At the break of day
And you’ve tried so hard to tell yourself
That you’ll be okay

Memories slip through your grasp
As you fade from time
But you can’t forget the one thing you could
Never find
I'm walking down this crumbling road
Again
The world keeps changing
Yet it's all the same

The fading daylight cannot hide
These scars
One more 'tomorrow'
Fades to 'yesterday'

But still I'm marching on

There is a light in the distance
It leads me on
It calls my name
And guides me on my way

And while I long for tomorrow
I want to leave this life
Give up this path
And throw it all away

Today

What point in fighting
When you're all alone?
Each life's a moment
Then they fade to grey

You'd think by now
I'd have a heart of stone
Yet each new meeting
Makes me long to stay

But still you call me on

There is a wind blowing onwards
It knows my past
It knows my fate
Yet guides me anyway

And when I long, full of sorrow, for home
You lift me up
And push me on
And call me by my name:

Zel'nair
Here the wind that blows
 has always called my name
Here the shining rays
 peer out from falling rain

Waiting in the dark
 and dreaming of the dawn
Hoping in my heart
 that I can carry on

Holding in my hands
 a quiet memory
Of a promise made
 and a path to take

In the cold I hold it close
 and listen carefully
To the words I spoke
 long ago
Untitled
Lyrics I wrote to go along with what I could remember of a song from Wild Arms 5. In a way, you could say it's a character song for Avril, but while I did use inspiration from her story, it also applies to myself and my own characters.
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Rahdiyan
Sarah Jones
Artist | Student | Varied
United States
I'm an aspiring author/artist/music writer who loves anime and video games. I tend to procrastinate a lot, but once I get an idea in my head, I run with it to the end.

And what I'm currently running with is a book series. A lot of my art is related to whatever I'm writing at the time.

Current Residence: The other side of the Moon
Favourite genre of music: Game Soundtracks and J-Pop
Favourite style of art: Anime/Manga
Operating System: Windows 7
MP3 player of choice: iPod
Personal Quote: "Omoide no naka de chitto shiteite kure" ~Cloud, FFVII:AC
Interests

Comments


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:iconrollingtomorrow:
RollingTomorrow Featured By Owner Jun 8, 2013   General Artist
Hello! :iconexcitedhiplz:

:la: Welcome to :iconwriters--club:! :la:

We're glad to have you as a member and look forward to seeing your contributions! :typerhappy:

We also hold a lot of contests with great prizes, so keep your eye out for them! :iconlaspinplz: We also have a Critique Program for our members to submit to and receive detailed feedback on their work from our admin team. :D
Reply
:iconrahdiyan:
Rahdiyan Featured By Owner Jun 9, 2013  Student General Artist
Thanks! I look forward to being part of the group.
Reply
:iconcaptainstabby:
CaptainStabby Featured By Owner Sep 30, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Thanks for the :+fav: on Speedpaint: The Blossoms I.
Reply
:iconfurvert101:
furvert101 Featured By Owner Sep 11, 2009
are you taking photoshop classes, or what?
Reply
:iconrahdiyan:
Rahdiyan Featured By Owner Sep 12, 2009  Student General Artist
Technically, I've taken three. We covered the CS2 version in my 11th grade photography class, and then I've taken two art classes UVU that went over CS3 as well. The rest I just worked out through experience.
Reply
:iconfurvert101:
furvert101 Featured By Owner Sep 12, 2009
oh, ok... i was taking photoshop classes like... 2 years ago. now im getting magazine features, and getting ready to look for some freelance work. ^^
Reply
:iconrahdiyan:
Rahdiyan Featured By Owner Sep 13, 2009  Student General Artist
Sweet. Good luck with that. From what I saw of your stuff, you shouldn't have any trouble. There's so much! :D
Reply
(1 Reply)
:iconshirakasshikai:
ShirakasShikai Featured By Owner Jun 2, 2009  Student
It's a cool pic. Hope you get some recognition for it. Ganbare!
Reply
:iconshirakasshikai:
ShirakasShikai Featured By Owner Oct 6, 2005  Student
I have anger.
Reply
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