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The Hollywood Record

November 3, 1957



 

Editorial: Werewolves Don't Belong in Hollywood


By Charles Brooks, Editor-in-Chief


It seems that enough is finally enough even for the most liberal of studio executives.

Universal executives announced yesterday that they will be canceling production of Wolf Man and Wolf Woman Versus the Mummy.  We at the Record applaud this decision.  Gone are the days when the Wolf Man was nothing more than a monster for Halloween or the subject of b-movie comedies.  Film studios have no business exploiting public fears of Chronic Female Lycanthropy for commercial gain.

Unfortunately, the Wolf Man isn't the only werewolf endangering Hollywood's reputation.

At the Beverley Hills Charity Gala last evening, Mrs. Andrea Lindholm, widow of film legend Tom Lindholm and and owner of Lindholm Studios, spoke at length regarding the status of werewolves in Hollywood.  In Mrs. Lindholm's opinion, until the disease has been cured or at least controlled by medication, Hollywood should not allow werewolves to work on either side of the camera.  We at this paper agree.

In the short history of film, American actresses have been a centerpiece of filmmaking. Beautiful, graceful, demure, and feminine, the American actress presents an example to inspire women across the world.  Werewolves are none of these things.  They present the image of sickness and bestial incontinence.  Even producers of B-movies have little interest in casting werewolves, except to star in the lowest of lowbrow monster flicks.

Infected actresses should step aside and allow real women to take up the torch.  If they cannot be made to see reason, studios should introduce formal rules banning them from productions.  Measures must also be taken to ensure that infected women cannot simply disguise their condition. While the Los Angeles County Health Department currently maintains a list of infected, they refuse to share it.  To that end, studios need to create their own lists of known werewolves and update them regularly.

If werewolves must insist upon pursuing acting jobs, there are a number of opportunities available where their disease can be displayed for educational purposes.  As we understand it, Lindholm Studios has recently entered into contract with the U.S. Information Agency to produce a high-budget public service announcement on Chronic Female Lycanthropy to be distributed worldwide.
Promo material for Werewolves Versus Issue 5: Werewolves Versus Hollywood!  You can visit the official Werewolves Versus website for further information: werewolvesversus.com/ or follow the Werewolves Versus Twitter account: twitter.com/werewolves_vs

In coming days, expect further material, which will delve deeper into the setting.  But never fear - no spoilers here!  All promo material is brand new and spoiler-free!
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