Finals are finally over and I found out I passed my math class so I can relax about that. I failed this class in the summer so I had to take it again and I'm so glad to move on. I don't have my other grades yet, but I know I did well in those classes, so I'm not worried.
Now... I know I have been on hiatus for months now. I've stopped writing my fics and stopped replying to rps, only to occasionally post something. I am sorry for this. I have been struggling with things in real life for months, between failing my math summer class last year
, having learned for months on end about so many instances of discrimination going on in the world
(since I've been stigmatized for being Autistic and having secondary anxiety, I'm no stranger to being discriminated against), the fires back in October
, and my mom getting a bulging disc, I've stopped taking care of myself. I've been craving junk food, stopped sleeping well and I've lost motivation to do even things I love. All I want to do is sleep and binge-watch videos online. In short, I am severely burnout.
That is why I have just vanished and I am so sorry everyone. It is now summer vacay and there are going to be some changes. I'm going to spend at least the first week of summer resting and recovering from the school year. Then I will start planning out my fanfics more and see if I can find a routine that feels good for my health. I want to start replying to my rps again after recovering because I really love rping with my rp partners and I miss you all.
I also miss writing, and I am going to post a Transformers one-shot inspired by "Days in the Sun" from the 2017 Beauty and the Beast to get back into writing.
I'm also going to try Pilates as a form of exercise because I read that it helps with mental health and builds lean muscle. I want to stop feeling physically weak. If any of you have ever tried Pilates or know someone who has, some advice would be appreciated.
I do have a summer course again this year, but it's online and not as invasive. It is about children's health, safety, and nutrition. So that will be much easier to deal with.
My family will also be going on many day trips and at the end of July, we'll be going on the first real vacation we've had in years. I think we all need it.
Bottom line is, this summer I am focusing on self-care and climbing out of the burnout pit. I also want to work on self-improvement so next school year(my last year at the JC) is not as stressful.
But don't worry, these months haven't been all bad. Some good stuff has happened. I got straight A's last fall and was awarded "Dean's Highest Honors."
I also got to observe and volunteer in a TK classroom this semester and it really cemented for me that teaching young children is what I should do at least for the next season of my life.
I'm going to read, "What Teachers Make" by Taylor Mali, a book about why teachers are so important and what they can do for kids. I also bought a great study bible and I was invited to join the Phi Theta Kappa honor society.
I think overall, the future is bright.
I'm also going to get an Ask The OCs blog up on Tumblr sometime this year after I've been writing for awhile, so some advice there would be great too. It will be mostly text response based since my motor skills impairment keeps me from drawing, but if anyone wants to do profile pics for my OCs, I'd be eternally grateful. My Autism blog on Blogger will be updated again too.
To those of you who read all of this, thank you. I'm not trying to whine or complain or brag, I'm just trying to be honest about my hiatus and what has been going on with me. Thank you so much for listening and for being so patient with me.
I hope to talk to you all more often and to start being creative again.