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Affigogender (1)

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Published: March 18, 2017
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Affigogender

The prefix affigo (pronunciation: /afˈfiː.ɡoː/) comes from the Latin for: I imprint on, I attach to.

Affigogender is a term for people who were raised with an assigned and imposed gender. They may choose to hold on to and live as that gender (which characterizes a cisgender person), or they may disagree with their gender assignment (which characterizes someone who can identify as transgender). [1]

The flag contains the following colors: black, symbolizing the mourning for bad things caused by the imposition of gender; blue and pink, representing the cisnormative and exorsexist/binarist imposition of gender; and white, a request for peace from gender assignment and imposition.

Term created in 2016 by Rexistencia Não Binária (Nonbinary RExistence, a Brazilian collective).

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anonymous's avatar
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Pastelmemer's avatar
PastelmemerHobbyist Digital Artist
For those confused: this does apply to most people, but the growing rate of proper gender-neutral parenting without an assigned gender has made this refreshingly less common, though most anyone old enough to be on deviantart were most likely not raised this way.

So, this is for those who have had a gender that was both assigned legally and enforced by their parents, family, friends, school, etc.
Yelpingfox's avatar
YelpingfoxHobbyist Digital Artist
I'm not sure I understand the purpose of this. Forgive my ignorance, but how would a gender be 'imposed' upon someone? The way you describe it makes it sounds like it applies to basically everyone.
Pride-Flags's avatar
What pastelmemer said 
"For those confused: this does apply to most people, but the growing rate of proper gender-neutral parenting without an assigned gender has made this refreshingly less common, though most anyone old enough to be on deviantart were most likely not raised this way.

So, this is for those who have had a gender that was both assigned legally and enforced by their parents, family, friends, school, etc."

This was made as a set along with accipiogender [Link], which I haven't uploaded yet since I don't have a HQ version yet.
I'm not sure how useful these terms will be but might as well upload them anyway
Yelpingfox's avatar
YelpingfoxHobbyist Digital Artist
I'm still not entirely sure what you mean. Does it mean people who were raised a certain way because of their gender, like they were told to act a certain way?
Pride-Flags's avatar
Well there's like the parents that are like "This is Jenny she's a Girl and we get her Girl Things and we may or may not impose strict gender roles on her because she's a Girl and that's all she ever will be" and then there's parents that are like "This is Sam, they like playing with barbies and dump trucks and aren't going to gender them based on what their junk looks like and let them decide because they know themself better than we do and we don't want to restrict their future and choices because of outdated gender roles." Since there's more parents nowadays doing this gender neutral parenting thing that it might be useful to have terms that distinguish between the two.

Does that make more sense? 
Pastelmemer's avatar
PastelmemerHobbyist Digital Artist
Not quite.

Almost everyone is *medically/legally* assigned a gender at birth based on their genitalia, or in the case of intersex children, by whatever genitalia theirs resembles the most, or just arbitrarily chosen for them. Most children are raised *socially* in correspondence with this medical assignment- their legally assigned gender is also imposed on them by whoever is raising them. Their parents will use certain pronouns and gender terms from birth as opposed to waiting for the child to be old enough to understand and express what gender(s) they actually identify as. Most people would fit under this term/flag, as it is a harmful practice that is only now beginning to change with gender-neutral parenting. This term is meant to acknowledge the hardships associated with having a gender imposed upon you by your parents, which nearly all of us have gone through.

Nowadays, some parents choose to raise their children gender-neutrally, as opposed to how most of us have been raised. Gender-neutrally raised kids have had their parents use they/them from birth until the child expresses their own pronoun preference, and their parents would not call them a boy or girl or use gendered language on them until the child indicated a preference.

In short, this term refers to those who had their parents go "well this kid has been medically assigned female/male based off of their sex characteristics, so I'm going to raise them as female/male and make them adhere to whatever gender roles I associate with that gender." In all likelihood, you were raised this way. I was. It hurt me a lot. I'm glad that some kids are being spared that experience now as society changes and parents actually let kids express their feelings freely without having already been put into a box based off of their bodies.
Yelpingfox's avatar
YelpingfoxHobbyist Digital Artist
I don't understand how calling a child "him/her" based on their genitalia could have such a negative effect? I mean, when they're old enough to decide, if they happen to want to be the opposite gender, just be good parent and say "Okay, we'll call you that from now on." Just because you use pronouns that apply to them unless they decide otherwise doesn't make it harmful. Calling them them/they might make them feel like they have to decide something, which might result in them making a hasty decision they'll regret. Gender isn't a decision for everyone, and that's okay. 

I do understand having gender roles imposed on you, that sucks. 
Pastelmemer's avatar
PastelmemerHobbyist Digital Artist
Gender can change. The child should be raised with the knowledge that they always have the freedom to change their pronoun and gender preference, whenever they want. There's no hasty decision to make, they can try things out freely.

They/them is just a neutral pronoun set. The only reasons a child might feel apprehensive about them is because of transphobia or because they prefer other pronouns, but they can always talk to their parents about this. Gender-neutral raising parents aren't going to care if their kid talks to them about their gender feelings.

I think it's important to remember how different the entire experience would be being raised neutrally with supportive parents.

Also, using pronouns based on genitalia is cissexist. Anything implying "penis = he" is something that needs to be removed from social constructs. There's nothing different or weird about they/them compared to any other pronouns, especially if the kid is raised knowing that all pronouns are equally valid. This is a child raised in a non-transphobic environment, they/them is normal to them.
Meadowfoxx's avatar
MeadowfoxxHobbyist General Artist
I believe it does, but some children are raised very ambiguously (I was, at least) and I believe this does not apply to them, only to people who had strong gender-based influences on their lives growing up.
I may be wrong, however.
Yelpingfox's avatar
YelpingfoxHobbyist Digital Artist
Hmm, all right. That makes sense.
anonymous's avatar
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