Three days ago, you wrote this journal
, and as much as I hate to admit it, reading it, as well as the comments beneath, has made me strongly question the worth of my relationship with you.
Don't get me wrong. I still think you're a fountain of inspiration, someone who has a piece of advice to offer for almost every situation - well, at least every situation relevant to most people associating themselves with you. But with this journal, you effectively shot yourself in the foot, particularly the part about the "unsung heroes" and how you insist the WSW needs more of these. Fair enough, but there are two things so very wrong with the way you phrased your arguments. Nothing that hasn't been brought up by others (specifically, but not limited to
), so I'm just rehashing already-said stuff, but here goes.One:
I'm not talking about those kinds of heroes: the ones who resolve the crisis after it happened.
I'm talking about the unsung heroes: the ones who prevent the crisis from ever happening.
What I hope you realize is that this is the internet. It's hard enough in real life to tell what a person is thinking, but online, when all you have to go by is text written by that person, it's so much easier to hide things. When it comes to understanding people, you are, among the rest of the WSW, second to none. However, when someone has an issue, they tend to bottle it up, not allowing others to find out what's wrong until it's too late.
You seem to expect everyone to be able to read minds; over the internet, no less. But what's even worse is that, from the way you worded your journal, and from the way you worded yourself during that argument with SDV
, you're not willing at all to give those who at least make an effort to resolve a crisis after it's occurred (because, as I said, they couldn't possibly have had a way of knowing it was coming
) any appreciation. And that would just be a very binary way of thinking: "Either you resolve the crisis before it can even start, or you might as well not be helping at all."
That may not have been your intention to say, but it's exactly how it came across.Two:
No quotes, because this one's practically all over your journal. You claim to be literally the only one who pulls their weight around the WSW, and that notion is just utterly deplorable. It's kind of intertwined with my first point in that it seems that you're completely disregarding those who are at least trying to put the fire out. Some may be doing it for the glory, but did it ever cross your mind that there may be a lot of people in the WSW who... oh, I don't know... LOVE THE STATION WAGON and want to resolve crises to the best of their abilities (which, by the way, don't involve the clairvoyance you demand) out of their love for the group?
Many members feel like the WSW is a second home, and that's a fact. For many (even for myself, in the short time I was riding along), it has changed their lives for the better, and that's a fact. To those helping (or trying to help), your journal may have very well been a hefty kick in the nads, and that's... well, not exactly a fact I could easily back up, but it's certainly how I feel about it.
I'm not even going to address the general tone of your journal, because AlgaeNymph
put it quite nicely
. So let's move on to my greatest worry.
I didn't actually realize it until ScarletDevilVocaloid
pointed it out, but it's hard to get to know you on an emotional level. Looking back at my own experiences with you, I don't think I've ever talked to you about anything but ongoing crises in the WSW (like right now) or stuff I made. To me, you just don't seem very compatible for talking about other, random things. The fact that I hardly even see you online thanks to incompatible time zones doesn't help in the least. And that's problematic. We may be getting along on the rare occasions we actually do get to talk, but I can hardly consider you a friend in the same way I consider FullHitPoints
to be one. A guy who I hang out with almost every day, who I've been effectively bonding with over several dev sessions, who I've had many occasions where we'd laugh like absolute retards for minutes on end, but also who I've had my fair share of strong arguments with that would threaten to kill the friendship. That's the mark of a great friend, yet it's what you are not. As I said before, you're a fountain of advice and you're also the definition of a good leader. But at the same time, you're also very aloof. I can't really put my finger on why, but perhaps it's that you're so successful, it makes people look up to and revere you, yet at the same time keeps them in awe and thinking they're not worthy of being close to you. We both know that's bullshit, but that's likely what keeps people at a distance. Perhaps it'd be prudent for you to can Spaz the Workaholic and bring out Spaz the People Person. You claim to have social skills, and while I certainly don't doubt that, now would be the best time to put them to use. Get down from the high horse that people think you're sitting on and mingle with the common folk. Unfortunately I don't really have any advice for how to accomplish that, but there's like 500 other people in the Wagon you can ask. All I know is that it is indeed very much possible to become close and personal friends with someone you regarded as something of a celebrity at first.