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About Varied / Hobbyist jessicaUnited States Recent Activity
Deviant for 9 Years
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Moms Cats - Speckle Portrait by pitadragon Moms Cats - Speckle Portrait :iconpitadragon:pitadragon 1 0 Crack by the River by pitadragon Crack by the River :iconpitadragon:pitadragon 0 0 Moms Cats - Kenny on The Couch by pitadragon Moms Cats - Kenny on The Couch :iconpitadragon:pitadragon 3 0 Moms Cats - Kenny by pitadragon Moms Cats - Kenny :iconpitadragon:pitadragon 3 0 Moms Cats - Speckle by pitadragon Moms Cats - Speckle :iconpitadragon:pitadragon 1 0
A Confession to Myself
I need to talk, but I don't want any one to know
I need to let it out, but I don't want it to show
You'd think I would have someone to turn to
Maybe I have friends who might understand
But how do I tell them and not feel bad
Then I get "better", but what a difference it made
The mountains flattened out to flat land
But it was only because my feet hurt so bad I couldn't feel the ups and downs
I let the trash push people outside
So now I have a mountain inside
So here I am, not sad, crushed by my self
Pinned by wounds I thought had healed
I'm not sad.
I always thought I'd have someone to talk to, but lately I've been talking to the walls
I really wish I had someone to call, but who the hell wants to listen to it all
And you're gonna say talk to me, but you're not listening
You're not listening
And my issues are a joke
friends, family, they laugh at it all
It's clearly a sign that something is wrong
It's showing and no one is noticing
No One is noticing
But that's ok, I've been here befor
:iconpitadragon:pitadragon 1 0
Graveyard Cross by pitadragon Graveyard Cross :iconpitadragon:pitadragon 1 0 Cleo by pitadragon Cleo :iconpitadragon:pitadragon 0 0 Pond Photo by pitadragon Pond Photo :iconpitadragon:pitadragon 0 0 Bubbles by pitadragon Bubbles :iconpitadragon:pitadragon 0 0 Golden Pumpkin by pitadragon Golden Pumpkin :iconpitadragon:pitadragon 1 0 Cactus Flower by pitadragon Cactus Flower :iconpitadragon:pitadragon 3 3 Ink Fox Spirit  by pitadragon Ink Fox Spirit :iconpitadragon:pitadragon 2 0 Ghost Kitty by pitadragon Ghost Kitty :iconpitadragon:pitadragon 0 0 cat stuffy concept by pitadragon cat stuffy concept :iconpitadragon:pitadragon 0 0 whale doodle by pitadragon whale doodle :iconpitadragon:pitadragon 2 0


Ritual by Shesvii Ritual :iconshesvii:Shesvii 55 14 Beast Wars Longrack Custom by Unicron9 Beast Wars Longrack Custom :iconunicron9:Unicron9 30 8 SA| Credence | Check Point Set II by Wulfeneit SA| Credence | Check Point Set II :iconwulfeneit:Wulfeneit 43 2 Spiderverse fanart by DanielAraya Spiderverse fanart :icondanielaraya:DanielAraya 99 1 Leads-To-Nowhere by Mr-Xerty Leads-To-Nowhere :iconmr-xerty:Mr-Xerty 31 3 HYMNS - Prelude #5 by jannaphia HYMNS - Prelude #5 :iconjannaphia:jannaphia 32 3 Martinus [COMBUSTION] by Littlenorwegians Martinus [COMBUSTION] :iconlittlenorwegians:Littlenorwegians 73 5 soul thief by ShredderDima soul thief :iconshredderdima:ShredderDima 204 5 Bearclaw Pass by ApneicMonkey Bearclaw Pass :iconapneicmonkey:ApneicMonkey 157 8 Daybreaker by alltelleringet Daybreaker :iconalltelleringet:alltelleringet 302 22 Griffins by terriblenerd Griffins :iconterriblenerd:terriblenerd 107 7 Destroy This World Right Now by NanFe Destroy This World Right Now :iconnanfe:NanFe 528 7 Luminessence by NanFe Luminessence :iconnanfe:NanFe 459 6 I don't need a hero by Risata I don't need a hero :iconrisata:Risata 69 46 Cats and Dogs Doujinshi - pg03 by Technoelfie Cats and Dogs Doujinshi - pg03 :icontechnoelfie:Technoelfie 3,251 268 Inuyasha - Confusion by Technoelfie Inuyasha - Confusion :icontechnoelfie:Technoelfie 2,352 200


Its awful to feel like a joke. The never ending butt of a joke that society thinks is so damn funny.
I'm fat, I know it, I never really saw it as a negative thing until recently. It's not something I let hold me back. I hike, I ride my bike, I wander the world on foot.  But damn dosent the world like to put you down for it. I can count the amount of times I've  done something a "fat" person shouldn't be able to do. This comes up alot since I work a physically demanding job.....especially with new people who dont get just how fast the machine is going.
It's so wonderfully frustrating to get to see people like me as the joke in popular media. All with the "love your self" undertones being played in the background. Yeah that's real helpful. It just so uplifting. My size is funny, but I can fix that right......its easy......just diet and exercise. HA!  You know the thing about being fat comes from alot of different isn't always the problem. And well me I'm the winner of the genetic lottery...yay. nothing like having a hormone issue run in the family. Just make everything so damn easy.
And Dating....we're not gonna talk about Dating. 4 years, 3 cats. No relationships. Unfortunately I've been trying. Waste of my time and effort. They just see my body and nothing more. And that's all it takes. Please dont tell me it's just the guys I'm trying or that the right one is out there, ok. Because I'm not going to waste my time any more. I'd rather do something else than try to go on another date.....I'll take my self to dinner, no "strings" attached.
I'm a wonderful mess of trust issues, anxiety, and depression that has crammed itself into a small metal box. I'm tired. Im so tired for pushing forward alone. I feel like I'm wandering in the desert chasing mirages.
And then the world steps in to back it up. With the "fat chick" cliche. She's fat...that's funny, right? Wonderful.


pitadragon's Profile Picture
Artist | Hobbyist | Varied
United States
Art is more than a hobby for me, its my heart and soul. Even with out pencil and paper I still find ways to create art. My favorite method is drawing, but I branch out in to all forms of art.


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squidmaiden Featured By Owner Jun 15, 2018
Thanks so much for faving! Have a nice day ^^
SlingBlade87 Featured By Owner Feb 11, 2018  Professional Writer
Thank you for the fave.

Glad you enjoyed it.
IttoOgamy Featured By Owner Nov 2, 2017
Thanks for the fav
pitadragon Featured By Owner Nov 2, 2017  Hobbyist General Artist
welcome. 😊
cb350four Featured By Owner Oct 8, 2017
Hi pitadragon ヾ(o・∀・o)ノ゙
Thank you for the fav !
pitadragon Featured By Owner Oct 9, 2017  Hobbyist General Artist
Welcome. 😃
SiwySzczur Featured By Owner Jun 17, 2017
Nice gallery:)
pitadragon Featured By Owner Jun 17, 2017  Hobbyist General Artist
thank you. :)
SiwySzczur Featured By Owner Jun 17, 2017
No problem, I like good art:) I invite you to my gallery:)If you like my work, watch me :)
TimesFire90 Featured By Owner Nov 30, 2016  Hobbyist Writer
Thanks for faving!
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